So sad: leaving Hawaii. It’s kind of like leaving Las Vegas, only not as empty handed.
Butt we’re back in D.C. now; the eagle officially landing at 6:50 am.
We wrapped up our last full day in Big Guy’s alleged birth state with a nice adult-only dinner (and nice adult beverages) at Nobu Waikiki Sunday night:
Nobu specialties: yellowtail sashimi jalapeno and miso marinated black cod
Then we went back to the compound in order to let staff pack up for our departure last night:
Rested. Ready to take on any of those wascally Weepublicans, all of whom "support the failed policies of past." As opposed to the failed policies of the present.
And here we are – back in freezing, gridlocked Washington:
And happy to be here! We are so ready to get back to work
on for the American people! In fact, Big Guy’s unofficially launching his reelection campaign tonight with a live Web-feed video chat with his Iowa caucus delegates. So we’ve got our priorities straight. There’s no way we can get our job done around here if we don’t first get reelected.
Besides, does anyone really think that Iran is serious about all that saber rattling? And even if they are, don’t worry, if the Iranians actually decide to close the straits of Hormuz or fire off some nuclear warheads, we’ll buy them off by giving them a few more of our super-secret fighter jets to play with.
Anyway, back to the exciting campaign, here’s a little sneak preview. As you know, we’ve been floating a lot of different WTF strategies, butt now we’ve settled on a theme: Blame the Republicans. And their Do-nothing Congress. (H/T Teddy Roosevelt) Combined with constant reminders of the “breathtaking greed” (Wall Street, Republicans, Romney – get it?) that drove us into the ditch in the first place, the boyz around here figure they’ve nailed it. Our polls indicated we were losing traction with the “hang it on Bush” meme, butt nothing augers for a huge populist win like a good old fashioned class war.
Here’s how Peter Wehner explains it:
…the president is planning to step up his offensive against an unpopular Congress, concluding that he cannot pass any major legislation in 2012 because of Republican hostility to his agenda. He intends to “hammer the theme of economic justice for ordinary Americans rather than continue his legislative battles with Congress,”
even though, as Peter notes, Big Guy got almost everything he asked for during his first two years:
Moreover, Obama, during the first two years of his presidency, was enormously successful in getting his agenda enacted into law. He got almost everything he wanted, which some of us believe is precisely the problem. And to the extent that we’re facing a “do-nothing” Congress today, the responsibility lies with the Democratically-controlled Senate, not the GOP House. These days the Senate (which has not passed a budget in more than 900 days) is the place legislation goes to die.
Butt in an electoral campaign, truth is always subservient to the expedient:
But to really enter the Twilight Zone, consider these two priceless sentences from the Times story: “Winning a full-year extension of the payroll tax, Mr. Earnest said, will still be a top priority. He noted that House Republicans were now also arguing that it should be extended for a year, after some initially opposed extending it at all.”
Come again? On December 13, the GOP House passed a full-year extension of the payroll tax cut – and was promptly criticized by – you guessed it — the president. Obama favored a much shorter, two-month extension. House Republicans, under intense political pressure, eventually agreed to the two-month extension. Now the White House is declaring a full-year extension is a “top priority.” Yet as recently as three weeks ago the opposition to the president’s “top priority” came not from House Republicans but from Obama himself.
We are now reaching the point in which the president is running a truly post-modern campaign, in which there is no objective truth but simply narrative. Obama’s campaign isn’t simply distorting the facts; it is inverting them. This kind of thing isn’t unusual to find in the academy. But to see a president and his campaign so thoroughly deconstruct truth in order to maintain power is quite rare. The sheer audacity of Obama’s cynicism is a wonder of the modern world.
So you see what we’re up against: more GOP lies and distortions. Butt really, who doesn’t love a good post-modern campaign?
Were just having a little trouble settling on our official 2012 campaign poster. Which one do you like best? I can’t guarantee we’ll go with the one that gets the most votes, since I understand we’re waiving certain democratic rules until we get this country back on the right track, butt it might make you feel better to cast your vote anyway.
Poster Candidates for our Post-Modern WTF Campaign
#1, compliments of ThePeoplesCube:
Alternate contact: AttackWatch.com
Or, Poster #2, compliments of, well, moi:
Polls will remain open until 11:59 ET Wednesday, and as always, Chicago rules apply.