Friday, October 1, 2010

One Pill Makes It Friday-Update Too

So, today I’m going back to NASA’s lab to have my Quad-core CPUs re-treated. Toes says it’s all my fault; that I probably got the “swine flu” as punishment for my capitalist pig activities. I don’t know, Raj says I can’t get the swine flu, butt I still feel like crap and really do need to shut down for awhile.Normally I would let Raj take over and do tutorials, but he’s been afflicted too.

Anyhoo, I’m dictating this to Little Mo, so please excuse any typos, as well as any unwarranted rants, insults or run on sentences: normally he’s just a gatherer.

If I had to get sick, I guess this is as good a time as any. Everybody’s in a big giant funk, rats are jumping off the ship so fast we may need to bring in some children’s fat behinds for ballast and stability. Big Guy’s all wee weed up and smoking about a carton a day, Lady M is threatening to confiscate Fancy Nancy’s botox for going home without giving SEIU it’s big school lunch payoff America’s school children the healthy, nutritious lunches they deserve, and I am really going to need to be at full strength for these last few weeks leading up to November.

I thought I’d pass on a few linkys I ran across while curled up in my jammies.

  1. RightChange.com: A great website promoting America’s founding principles (and us too! we’re linked right under the good Michelle (Malkin) way cool!). right change bannerAnother new rightwing source: I think they’re taking over the interweb. They’re the guys who do “Late Night With The Obamas” over on RIGHTNETWORK (which you already like the crap out of and where we’re also linked right under the good Michelle), and they’ve got a bunch of other funny animations too.
  2. Andrea Shea King’s blogtalkradio show The Radio Patriot featuring Bill Miller (author, The Tea Party Papers) and Jeff Bruzzo of Project Shining City.andrea shea king They’ll be talking about the 10-2-2010 Restoring America Rally at The Great Adventure Theme Park in New Jersey where the featured speaker will be Glenn Beck. It’s about an hour long and you can listen to it or download it to your hard drive, like I did, here “The Andrea Shea King Show – Restoring America Rally”
  3. If you’re still not sure of the wisdom of our new strategy (kicking our own base’s ass) then you should check out our own Jill’s take (Pundette half of Pundit & Pundette):
  4. I don’t want to get all serious and bodyguard on you, but if you don’t have 24/7 SS stormtroppers “keepin’ your back” like I do, and you probably don’t, Barbara Curtis at Mommy Life has a list of “Must Reads” that you must not miss. I would only add Gavin de Becker’s first primer “The Gift of Fear”. I know it sounds creepy, but it might save your life, or the life of someone you love. Trust your instincts: God gave them to you for a reason.
  5. Back to the lighter stuff, if you haven’t read them yet, P.J. O’Rourke’s two articles at RIGHTNETWORK are well worth a read. Big Guy think he likes PJ, because his name begins with “O” and because he wrote a book called “Eat the Rich.” It’s on his desk, butt he’s never read it. “O”bviously. orourkebio

Now Raj says I have to do an update re-boot to quarantine the viruses found so far. I hope it’s the anti-virus software causing hallucinations, because it’s getting a little, ummm, rabbit hole’y around here.

O'MAD HATTER& red queen at desk Watermarkedy

White Rabbit: Jefferson Airplane

Hope to be back soon, but I’ll be checking in to see what all my MOLs, MODs and FOMs have turned up so I don’t get too far behind.

Thursday, September 30, 2010

Blessed are the poor, for they shall inherit the wealth of the not-so-poor.

I have a brief recap of Big Guy’s newest “Stop Whining” tour for you:

There was A HUGE rally in Madison Wisconsin on Tuesday,  energized by hundreds of college students who haven’t yet figured out that eventually they’re going to have to get jobs, buy their own health insurance and pay for all the stuff Big Guy  is “stimulating.”

08 again

The backyard barbeques are not going quite as well. The questions are getting more pointed, and BO’s answers are getting longer. If you’ve seen Big Guy without TOTUS, you will know that this is usually a bad combination.

question

In order to deflect attention from economic issues, which seem to be one of the things the stupid people are whining about, Big Guy decided to get back in touch with his faith, which we have now firmly established to be Christianity by choice.

He’s also using the backyard meet and eats to promote his own twist on the Christian faith: it combines the best parts of Christian doctrine with the best parts of Black Liberation Theology and Marxism’s central concept of redistribution of wealth.  Big Guy calls it the Obamacare Progressive Unification Church (OPUC).

He’s hoping that the Pope will name him Patron Saint of Free Health Care before the election, because that will probably pull all of the Catholics into his camp.

obama-christ Patron Saint of Free Health Care

While based on the precepts of the Prophets Marx and Reverend Wright, OPUC wasn’t an official religion until it was codified last March in a 2000 page document by the church council of elders.

24healthspan2-cnd-articleLarge

Like all great faiths, it requires adherents to defer to a higher power (the government). In return, that higher power (government) promises you eternal HOPE and CHANGE. And free healthcare.

In order to be a member of the sect, you must accept certain precepts on faith:

  • that you will be able to keep your own insurance,
  • that you can keep your own doctor,
  • there will be no federal coverage for abortions, 
  • that there will be no rationing of procedures or services,
  • there will be no death panels, and – here’s the one that really tests your faith -
  • that it will decrease government’s health care costs as well as your own individual premiums.

Surprisingly, even with so much to offer, Big Guy’s still having a hard time selling it to the regular backyard ‘folks.’ Although that’s probably because they’re all lazy, stupid and whiny.

Because we have so little time left to “get our message out,” we’re tapping into our administration’s preacher in chief: that’s right, Lady M. She’ll be launching her proselytizing campaign on behalf of our beleaguered legislators on October 13th. (watch for a whole new wardrobe)

michelle

In addition to the gospel of OPUC,  she’ll also be preaching the virtues of a diet of organic vegetables, low fat and low salt. For obvious reasons, she’ll not be attending any of the backyard barbeques.

OPUC even has their own new facebook page! Be sure to check it out  and leave a comment: but no whining, please.

Oh, and one last thing. Although our current colleges and universities are doing an admirable job of teaching many of the concepts and principles of this new religion, Big Guy is thinking of establishing his own religion-based institute of higher education: OPUC-U.  When he finally leaves office, BO will be taking over the chairmanship of The Living Constitution: Judicial Activism for Social Justice department.

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

We Need You, You Ungrateful, Lazy, Stupid, Whiny Son of a B****h!

We have apparently regrouped and developed a new strategy for holding on to Congress after the mid terms.

Big Guy kicked it off with his interview in Rolling Stone which will hit the newsstands Friday. He told the troops that they need to get off their dead butts and get to the polls in November to vote for more change. "It is inexcusable for any Democrat or progressive right now to stand on the sidelines in this midterm election, Buck up.” Just because they haven’t gotten everything they wanted, like free tuition and legal dope, is no reason not to rock the vote.

I'LL NEVER VOTE AGAIN-big copy Ziggy is sorry: “I THOUGHT HE’D PAY FOR MY SCHOOL AND LEGALIZE DOPE. I AM VERY SORRY. I WILL NEVER VOTE AGAIN.

And last weekend John Kerry tried to help out too, by telling democrats that they just don’t get it. “We have an electorate that doesn’t always pay that much attention to what’s going on so people are influenced by a simple slogan rather than the facts or truth or what’s happening.”

Hey John...bubbie...that was the horse we rode in on, remember?

 

john%20kerry-spermJohn Kerry doing one of the world’s dirtiest jobs

This all comes on the heels of Joey B’s appearance on the Rachael Madow show where he told our constituents that they’ve got to stop whining. Our lefty blogosphere went nuts, so Joey had to go back on Ms.NBC the next night to correct the “stop whining” comment to “buck up,” which is now our official ass-kicking anthem.

It’s probably because I’m still not firing on all of my re-capacitator-trons, but the exact strategy of this campaign is not perfectly clear to me – which is something that Big Guy always likes to be. All I’ve got so far is we’re switching our aim-blame away from GWB and the Republicans to our own base. Which seems a bit risky, based on the blogosphere’s initial reaction to Joey’s remark.

Here’s how I think it’s supposed to play out: we call our loyal base Lazy, Stupid and Whiny to guilt them into voting for our guys. Next we find 4 more motivators to get the vote out, for the full complement of 7 dwarfs. Then Prince Charming wakens our Sleeping Beauty from a deep, drug induced sleep, and we all live happily ever after.

I believe Oliver Stone had a hand in writing the script. He’s got Big Guy cast as Sleeping Beauty, unclear on who he has in mind for Prince Charming yet. Butt I sure hope he doesn’t expect Lady M to play the evil stepmother, because she’ll never go along with that. And I sure as hell don’t intend to do the “mirror, mirror” bit.

It used to be that when the Dems went into a “message-fail” mode our fallback position used to be hit all the MSM talking head shows and tell everyone that “we’re just not getting our message out.” It basically means the same as “our base is lazy, stupid and whiny,” but it never seemed to get everyone’s panties in a bundle.

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Bubba Speaks From the Rabbit Hole

I still haven’t quarantined the virus for a full  reboot, butt I saw this and just had to post it, before it turns into another big speculation-fest. Big Guy is not, repeat NOT leaving the Democrat party for the Tea Party:

We all know why the Mad Hatter is not running on the Tea Party ticket: He’s a Democrat and he’s already got a job.

pres mad hatter copy

And besides, we have our own “tea” party here every afternoon.

Monday, September 27, 2010

Sick Day

Don’t panic! It doesn’t have anything to do with my recent investigative reporting, butt I seem to have picked up a virus. Raj says it’s a common enough bug, butt it requires a little down time and chicken soup.

So, I won’t be posting for a day or so while I fight off this fever. I’ll be back as soon as I can.

Hugs & ♥s

sick MOTUS copy

Sunday, September 26, 2010

Deadlines Datelines and Dead-ends

DATELINE “DC”: Cub Reporter MOTUS Reporting

MOTUS REPORTING FROM MUSEUM copy

Appropriate Background Sound Effects

The interweb is buzzing with speculation following the release here on MOTUS’ blog, of an unauthorized video of President Obama in an unguarded moment. The video, obtained from a secret source, appears to show Big Guy secretly enjoying what some have suggested might be, a “Monica rope line” moment with old law school chum, Gregory “Greggers” Dingens. That little post appears to have triggered a firestorm of reporting, analysis and speculation that has lit up the interweb from HillBuzz, to iOwnTheWorld to RIGHTNETWORK. Where’s Drudge on this?

crossfire_304155_1[486456] Monica & Bubba Rope Line Moment-iOwnTheWorld

aaobama1Obama & Greggers – RIGHTNETWORK 

Sources tell this cub reporter that Greggers is a former defensive tackle, from Notre Dame. I don’t know about that, but he sure is a big bruiser. I had my mole, Little Mo, dig into this and he found Greggers player profile from the Fighting Irish Monogram Club website:

dingens player bioGreg Dingens '86, who played defensive tackle under Gerry Faust, joined the Monogram Club Board of Directors in 2008. The three-time Academic All-American and 1986 Byron Kanaley Award winner graduated magna cum laude and earned Phi Beta Kappa honors at Notre Dame. He received post-graduate scholarships from the NCAA and the National Football Foundation. Dingens, who graduated cum laude from Harvard Law School in 1992, has spent his entire career in Chicago. He currently is a partner and the head of investment banking at Monroe Securities Inc., a boutique investment bank which covers the community banking sector, and a general partner of Siena Capital Partners I., L.P., a private investment fund that invests in community banks.

So I asked myself, “What’s a nice, Catholic, investment banker from Chicago doing at a UN delegate’s reception sponsored by Big Guy?” We know how Big Guy feels about Wall Street investment bankers, although there may be a loophole here, because Monroe Securities is located on North Riverside Plaza, not Wall Street.

Then I remembered Big Guy, Mo, JoeyB, Harry Reid, Fancy Nancy and the rest of the Team celebrating the latest Senate legislative “colonoscopy”: Creating Small Business Jobs Act of 2010. The celebration started Thursday, just hours before the big UN reception. A nosey cub reporter might ask, “could there be a connection?” Let’s have a look.

The “Creating Small Business Jobs Act of 2010” aka “Mini-TARP” provides, among other goodies, a $30 billion lending fund for small business. Ok, are you still with me? The $30 billion will be administered by “Toxic-Tax-Cheat Timmy” Geitner, and will be awarded to community banks “...deemed strong by regulators.” 

Community banks...community banks...I know I just saw something about that...Oh, yes:

Greggers “...currently is a partner and the head of investment banking at Monroe Securities Inc., a boutique investment bank which covers the community banking sector...”

So let me see if there might be some dots to connect:

  • Senate rams gains passage of Big guy’s mini-TARP on Thursday
  • Mini-TARP provides $30 billion lending fund which will be awarded to “community banks” by Toxic-Tax-Cheat-Timmy Geitner
  • Big Guy attends UN delegate’s reception Thursday evening
  • At UN delegate’s reception, he bumps into old Harvard chum Greggers, who is not a UN delegate, butt is a partner in a Chicago securities firm specializing in the “community banking sector”

Damn! Dead-end: a cub reporter’s nightmare! Oh well, I wouldn’t have been able to connect the dots anyway, since it’s above my pay grade.

Back to you Walter.

imagesCAH54IB4

Footnote: Here are a couple more dots I found that can’t be connected either.

  • Some critics, who know more about bureaucrat-speak and legislation than me, say that this bill won’t help small businesses much, nor create many jobs. In fact, it appears that  most community banks don’t want anything to do with it. So who does benefit? Another dead end. 
  • Shore Bank, a community bank in Chicago (with Tony Rezko and many other Obamanite connections) was seized by the FDIC in August for insolvency, and its assets acquired by a consortium of Wall Street bankers and reincarnated as Urban Partnership Bank. Probably nothing here either, you know how urban conspiracy theories go.

Failsafe Election Strategies

After such a busy week, we’re laying low this weekend. In advance of hitting the campaign trail, we’re inspecting all of our containment systems. Some of them seem to have stretched  beyond the “failsafe” specs and are in need of some seam reinforcement.

3Backup containment system beginning to show some stress fractures at the Clinton Global Initiative.

Butt that reminds me: did you get a chance to hear BO’s introduction of MO at Bill’s Global Initiative?

President Barack Obama gushed with pride here Thursday as he introduced first lady Michelle Obama for her speech at the Clinton Global Initiative, telling the crowd that she’s the “moral center” that guides him through the noise of Washington and reminds him why he's there;

Well, I guess that’s one way to put it.

obama-umbrella

Assuming that’s the case, maybe we’ve identified part of the problem. I could see about having Raj reprogram both of their GPSs.

Big Guy wasn’t done yet, going on to praise Lady M as “a partner to me, and the best mother that I know.” Not to nitpick, but given what I’ve heard about Big Guy’s mom, that’s not exactly high praise.

ANN_DUNHAM_OBAMA_SOETERO_NUDE_2 Stanley Ann Dunham Obama Soetero, in her “art photo” days

Anyway, the Bill shill was probably the high point of the week. The UN assembly was a little vexing, with the Mad Iranian going off again like a looney tune, dissing the U.S. right after Big Guy graciously extended his hand in a gesture of  outreach.

Plus, BO was already off his good mood because the economy improvements he ordered hadn’t arrived yet, and he was counting on them to help with the upcoming elections. Unemployment: unexpectedly up again last week. GDP growth rate, unexpectedly slowing – when Big Guy specifically ordered it to speed up.  There’s gonna’ be a lot of “homework” assignments on Monday.

But there is some good news: August existing home sales were up!  August was only the second lowest month in 15 years. July was the lowest.

bojo So, as Joey B would say, “we’re headed in the right direction.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

Not that anyone around here is worried about the elections. Although Clarice’s Pieces today has our team all wee-weed up about November and 2012.

We just have to redouble our efforts to get the votes out. And if If Doug Ross is right about this:

Most of the findings focused on a group called Houston Votes, a voter registration group headed by Steve Caddle, who also works for the Service Employees International Union. Among the findings were that only 1,793 of the 25,000 registrations the group submitted appeared to be valid. The other registrations included one of a woman who registered six times in the same day; registrations of non-citizens; so many applications from one Houston Voters collector in one day that it was deemed to be beyond human capability…

all we have to do is get a hold of that Steve Caddle and get him to train the rest of our SEIU volunteers.

09_barney_and_friends