Saturday, December 14, 2013

Obama’s Fundamental Transformation of Photojourn-O-lism Is Complete: Selfies!

This is a week The Really Big Brains™ are anxious to put away in the circular file.

First, amidst allegations that Big Guy’s “most transparent administration ever” has consistently provided less access to the press than the Bush (“Miss Me Yet?”) administration, Jay-Jay initially just yucked it up, hoping the baying wolves would go away.

jayThe truth will set you free. Or as my boss says, “What does that mean?”

Ultimately though, he was forced into implementing a default tactic he learned at the Alinsky School of Propaganda and Prevarication: blame the victims. He accused the new media for the demise of the old media’s traditional press corpse role:

"A lot of this had to do with the fundamental transformations in the media, of which we and other institutions are participants," Carney told reporters. "But we did not create the Internet."

Well that’s good.

internet_brokenno internetWhat the Internet would look like if the Really Big Brains™ had created it

So for those of you who don’t speak journ0list, allow me to translate: “we don’t really need you guys so much anymore, as we are now running our propaganda and self-serving photo ops through our own social media.” Boy, this “transformational” crap can really swing around fast and bite you in the butt! Don’t worry though, JJ quickly smoothed everyone’s feelings over by telling one of his patented Big White Lies™:

“I can commit to you that we are working and have been working on expanding access where we can,” Carney said. “Let me be clear, that is the view from the very top.”

lies etcNews and views from the VERY top

Had he asked, I would have warned him: never-ever underestimate the fury of a woman or a journalist scorned.

you know obama's gayWoman Scorned: It Gets Ugly - h/t Gerard

UPDATED W/ The Money Quote: "Michelle Obama glowered straight ahead, as stony and merciless as the 15-foot statue of apartheid architect Dr. Hendrik Verwoerd that once stood guard outside the government offices of the Orange Free State. Eventually, weary of the trilateral smooching, the first lady switched seats and inserted herself between Barack and the vivacious Helle. How poignant that, on a day to celebrate the post-racial South Africa, the handsome young black man should have to be forcibly segregated from the cool Aryan blonde." Mark Steyn via American Digest

the white washing of Jay jayJourn0list scorned: Despite the Great White Washing, Still Ugly. - h/t Twitchy

Without a single word, with nothing more than the insertion of a red ellipse, a scorned member of the new media (the un-dead press-corpse) pointed out JJ’s mendacity. 

Butt that was hardly our worst headache last week. That distinction, of course, belonged to the self-inflicted selfie-scandal. As is often the case with issues of this sort with the Wons, it was a rightwing driven, racist, sexist, overhyped non-issue. Allow me to make my case; first everybody takes selfies!

The Clinton’s take selfies:

clinton selfie8783b230-3edb-0131-1275-7e870142d9c0clinton selfies

Joey Biden takes selfies:

joe-1024x555

Lady M and the Wee Wons take selfies:

130811_michelle_bo_obama_ap_605

sasha-obama-recital-malia-obama-selfie-gi

I know, I know: you’re saying “butt MOTUS, that’s different from taking smiling selfies at a funeral!”

 obama-selfie

Agreed. Butt I have proof that so-called “funeral selfies” are all the rage. See for yourself:

Screenshot Studio capture #1569

Yes. It has come to this. Apparently Big Guy and his little friends were just riding a tasteless meme.

Screenshot Studio capture #1568Although, at least these young narcissists seem to realize it’s wrong.

So that’s all I’m going to say about the Mandela memorial. Period. Because anything more and it would just get weird.

So let me close out today’s post with this lesson to be learned from the week’s News Follies: Don’t be that “Selfie Guy!”

For one thing, it’s addictive, and for another, it makes you look the fool.

Obama_Selfie_Chairs_LeakedOleg is back in business

And that’s all I’m going to say about that as well. Period.

Linked By: Charlotte Crain, Patricia Redd Dobbs, Abby L Call, Susana Patrick, Sarah Snow, Clint Counts on facebook, and @Standlow, @holymolyrocky on twitter, and BlogsLucianneLoves, and NOBO2012 on Free Republic, Thanks!

Cross-Posted on Patriot Action Network

Friday, December 13, 2013

Sometimes Being the Winner Sucks

And the Winner of this year’s Biggest Liar Award is…at least I think that telling the Politifact’s Lie of the Year makes you the Liar of the Year, right?

lie of the year

Period.

So I think you can safely add Politifact to the ever growing list of the IRS’s audit clients. Right behind Spirit Airlines:

spirit obamacare themed ad

That Obamacare themed ad was bad enough, butt this…this is just irresponsible. And in bad taste.

spirit ad24260-1386874110-8Oh no! They didn’t go there! Oh yes they did.

And apparently these irresponsible practitioners of free market capitalism have forgotten how the rules work under Big Guy:

BbUCDV8CMAEm1Xw[2]

Which is to say, we change the rules as we see fit and punish you if you don’t keep up. Take Obamacare for example; Kitty changed the rules again yesterday, extending the deadline for actually paying for your January 1, 2014 coverage from December 23 to December 31.  I should note that maybe a teeny-tiny portion of the reason for moving the date is due to the fact that we, uh, still haven’t built that end of the system yet.

pic_giant_120913_SM_Theres-No-Obamacare-Comeback-YetUnder-ConstructionBecause paying isn’t the most important part when you’re busy transforming the country

So here’s fair warning to all you evil insurance companies: keep up with us because if you screw up and fail to process claims from anyone who said they had placed their Obamacare plan on layaway before the end of the year, it’s going to be your fault.

Meanwhile, back on the home front, I see Minority Leader Pelosi busily lined up support for the bipartisan budget deal despite it not going far enough to fund and support all the usual Democrat causes. Understanding their concerns with the lack of pork, she nevertheless instructed her team to buck-up and “embrace the suck:”

Leading by example,

pelosi_034Damn, that sucks!

The minority leader told her members that the deal may be unsatisfactory but they should “embrace the suck.”

#getcovered.it sucksjpg

Scheeze! What the heck do they think we’ve all been doing for the past 5 years?

Obama Lemon

 

Screenshot Studio capture #1563

Linked By: The Crawdad Hole, Emma Tucker, Abby L Call, Swan Spirit, Mireille Buser, Janet Moorhead, Sandy Peterson, Michael W. Johnson, Mark Eckenrode, Kathleen Franklin Avant, Joanne Woodward, Colleen Sheehan, Emma Tucker, Donald P Domke on facebook, and @TurdBurglestein on twitter, and BlogsLucianneLoves, and NOBO2012 on Free Republic, Thanks!

Cross-Posted on Patriot Action Network

Thursday, December 12, 2013

Team Obama and Team GOP Play Prevent Defense: Drumsticks All Around

Well that was fun, butt it’s back to work today.

Michelle Obama Obamas Return Home South Africa jBqB9Gb5FD_lHappy, Happy, Happy!

I can’t believe that people are still talking about whether Lady M was really mad at Big Guy for his sophomoric antics at the memorial. I’m not going to discuss this any further, because I don’t want to be accused of being a racist. I will, however, direct you to a close up of our return to the Big White.

Michelle Obama Obamas Return Home South Africa LFyDj-ELJXBlLook closely: that is NOT smoke coming out of her nose/ears.

Suffice it to say I spent the evening in the bunker. Butt with so many new issues on deck, we’ll just let this one run it’s course.

Up first: yesterday’s latest Kitty hearings. First, you will be relieved to know that the Secretary of HHS has requested that her HHS Inspector General investigate what went wrong with the launch of Obamacare:

Health and Human Services Secretary Kathleen Sebelius…is asking the department’s inspector general to investigate the contracting process, management, performance and payment issues that may have contributed to the flawed launch of HealthCare.gov.

Although it sounds like House Oversight Chairman Darrell Issa thinks it’s perhaps gone beyond the point where Kitty investigating Kitty will suffice:

(Issa) sent to Sebelius today, HHS “hostility toward questions from Congress and the media about the implementation of ObamaCare is well known.  The Department’s most recent effort to stonewall, however, has morphed from mere obstinacy into criminal obstruction of a congressional investigation.”

Summary: Kitty brought new glasses and a new bag to the hearing, otherwise it was just more of the same old…well, you know.

Screenshot Studio capture #1558

I meant her necklace and squirty pin, what did  you think I meant?

Screenshot Studio capture #1559

Next, we need to discuss the amazing bipartisan budget agreement reached last night! It’s really good news – no more government shutdowns and everyone can go home for Christmas! Nobody butt House leadership really got their Christmas wish, so everyone’s equally unhappy: conservatives are still wishing for some real cuts and progs are still wishing for some real tax increases on the “rich” (those increased airline fare taxes don’t really count, they're “fees”).

I understand conservatives are objecting that this was a sellout on the part of Paul Ryan and company. Butt then I heard Congressman Ryan tell Sean Hannity: “Guess what? Elections have consequences!”

Who knew?  Other than Big Guy who, I believe, was the first President to crassly gently point that out to Senator McCain and company in early 2010:

“The election is over, John,” I WON. Deal with it.

Secondly, elections have consequences only if the electorate doesn’t vote the bums incumbents out at the first opportunity. Which they frequently don’t when the opposing team is playing prevent defense* like team Romney Ryan did.

*a defensive strategy used in football when the defense believes the offense must pass the ball…the goal of this strategy is to "prevent" the offense from gaining any significant yardage or scoring a touchdown in a single play, hence the name of the strategy. This defense will allow the offense to gain yardage within a limit that still prevents it from gaining the yards it needs to score.

mitt bo candy finger pointingDon’t try to score on the black man: you’ll get a 15 yard penalty for being a racist

Amazingly, it looks like the GOP has opted to continue their prevent defense right through the midterms, holding the Progs to a measly tax gain now.

The advantage of using the prevent defense is it enables the defense to manage the gains the offense makes without giving up any big plays.

Let’s just hope they don’t give up too much yardage in the process.

The disadvantage is that if enough insignificant gains are made, the offense may actually reach the ability to score with a single play.

we won chinese versionLike they did last time.(“We Won”, Chinese edition)

Far be it from me to criticize. After all what do I know about football? Let’s ask somebody who does:

There are many coaches who do not believe in using the prevent defense simply for this fact. The famous NFL coach and later broadcaster John Madden once said, "All a prevent defense does is prevent you from winning."

I’m sure John would have needed all of the drumsticks from one of his famous 6-legged birds in order to properly acknowledge all of the contributors to this budget deal turkey.

madden turkey leg award copy

Linked By: Larwyn’s Linx on Doug Ross@Journal, and Leanora on Hillary Is 44, Dennis Belcastro, Abby L Call, Jack Cunningham on facebook, and BlogsLucianneLoves, and NOBO2012 on Free Republic, Thanks!

Cross-Posted on Patriot Action Network

Wednesday, December 11, 2013

Baby, It’s Cold Outside

 

drudge

Don’t bet on it.

Despite it being summer in the southern hemisphere, by all reports the temperature dropped below that record low in Johannesburg yesterday. I’ve gathered a series of images showing the gathering clouds that blew in the cold front.

As you can see here, some people are more sensitive to the falling barometric pressure that indicates an approaching storm. Some however are totally oblivious.

Screenshot Studio capture #1556

The insensitive ones are completely caught up in their own activities when all of a sudden – BLAM!

525340425

The deep freeze arrived like a fury:

tumblr_inline_mxkm8xpRJi1qij8k6“The -135.8-degree temperature is more like you'd see on Mars on a nice summer day in the poles,"

Or perhaps a fury scorned.

Screenshot Studio capture #1555

As soon as the full force of the storm cell appears, self preservation skills begin to kick in:

 Screenshot Studio capture #1557“Lord, please don’t let me hurt him too bad; we still have to go to Hawaii later this month.”

Screenshot Studio capture #1557Helle: “If I’d known Hurricane Michelle was going to strike, I would’ve brought an umbrella.”

Despite rolling up her sleeves to deck one of them, Lady M eventually calmed down and decided to use the teacher’s method of dealing with these situations; she just made them change seats.

Obama-flirts-with-Denmark-PMs-seat switch“And another thing, Helle, I hate your people’s stinky little fish sandwiches.”

Whew! That was a close one! Big Guy sure doesn’t seem to do learning. This isn’t the first time he’s been caught in the middle of Hurricane Michelle. You all remember the Thalia incident don’t you?

Unfortunately, Jimmy Kimmel captured the whole thing for the Presidential library:

So maybe the interpreter for the deaf at Nelson Mandela’s memorial was a complete fake, whose signing of Big Guy’s speech was complete nonsense (hee):

South_Africa_Mandela_Interpreter_sff_TH170_20131211065440Fraudulent signer/interpreter with…Barry. Hee.

butt Big Guy’s apologies were sincere; both the one he delivered to Raul, and the one he delivered to Lady M.

And hopefully all this blow back we’re getting over this international incident will teach Barry an important  lesson on proper protocol when headed into a storm: always remember to bring your umbrella.

umbrella bo.1bmp

That way you can avoid these awkward “clean-up after the storm” shots.

mandela11n-15“Yeah, baby, you’re still my number one beard.”

Maybe I should nominate him for another Noble for this peace accord?

Linked By: Larwyn’s Linx on Doug Ross@Journal, and Abby L Call, Grey Havens on facebook, and @ValCSilver on twitter, and BlogsLucianneLoves, and NOBO2012 on Free Republic, Thanks!

Cross-Posted on Patriot Action Network

Tuesday, December 10, 2013

Castro, Mandela, Obama: Which Doesn’t Belong and Why?

This jet-lag is killing me, butt I just thought you would want to know: Lady M arrived to honor the late Nelson Mandela in one of her signature mini-me’s.

99cbc12986857d29450f6a706700d02dThe Wons arrive at Waterkloof Air Base, South Africa

And as you can see, it’s raining. And Lady M had to carry her own umbrella. Apparently this country still has a way to go before accomplishing complete racial equality, if you know what I mean and I think you do:

Was7544462 

As might be expected, Big Guy’s remarks were awesome:

“For nothing he achieved was inevitable. In the arc of his life, we see a man who earned his place in history through struggle and shrewdness; persistence and faith.”

Fine traits indeed - struggle and shrewdness; persistence and faith. And I will say, BO seems to have nailed the persistence part, to the point of being a pest. And I guess 1 out of 4 ain’t bad. Anyway, here’s my takeaway from the speech: “nothing he achieved was inevitable.” So, unless Big Guy gets to work on the schtruggle, the shrewdness and the faith parts, his legacy may not be inevitable either. Hold that thought. It my sustain you.

Butt today’s memorial was historic for more reasons than just Big Guy’s speech eulogizing Mandela as a “great liberator.” He also unveiled his new foreign relations policy by extended his unclenched fist to Cuba’s Communist President, Raul Castro: the first such gesture between a US President and a Cuban head of state since, well, you know, the Communists fought “inequality and poverty” and won.(?)

obama bows shakes hands castroEl Presidente, meet El Presidente

And since he also reprised his “Bowing to Foreign Monarchs and Dictators” policy while shaking hands, I guess we have a pretty good indication of what BO wishes his legacy to be. (UPDATE: More “Bowing to Foreign Monarchs and Dictators” at Fausta’s Blog here.)

Oh, and what a relief! Lady M had time to have her hair done and change clothes (for the third time since leaving Washington). She wore an occasion appropriate outfit for the actual memorial service: short, black and lacy. I thought you would want to know.

untitled

Oh, and Val-Jar was with us!

Michelle Obama Celebrities Attend Official ksLUhlY8vaAlUh, Oh! I said short, black and lacy, not “racy”

Former President and Laura Bush were there,

Screenshot Studio capture #1554

No, wait, that’s them right behind the Clintons:

525337701“Miss me yet? I thought so.”

Anyway, back to “the Speech:” BO urged the world to carry on Madiba’s legacy, like he is, by fighting inequality, poverty and discrimination:

"We, too, must act on behalf of justice. We, too, must act on behalf of peace. There are too many of us who happily embrace Madiba's legacy of racial reconciliation, but passionately resist even modest reforms that would challenge chronic poverty and growing inequality,"

He’s talking to all you old white guys still trying to keep the black man down. And you know who you are: the cranks who invented the term “Obamacare” - the racist way for old white guys to refer to the Affordable Care Act. Tune in later when we cover in more detail precisely how increased premiums, higher deductibles, limited access to doctors and top shelf hospitals, and restrictions on prescription medicines “challenge chronic poverty and growing inequality” (hint: it’s called “re-distribution”).

Until then, let’s all just think happy thoughts as we reflect on legacies of the black man’s schtruggle, fighting “inequality and poverty.” Obama’s schtruggle, that is, not the other guy’s.

 

obama-umbrella“Now what, Einstein?”

“I think we’ll just have to raise these taxes a bit higher.”

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Cross-Posted on Patriot Action Network