Saturday, December 25, 2021

Merry Christmas 2021

And, lo, the angel of the Lord came upon them, and the glory of the Lord shone round about them: and they were sore afraid. And the angel said unto them, fear not: for, behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people.

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For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Savior, which is Christ the Lord.  And this shall be a sign unto you; ye shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger. And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God, and saying, Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men.

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Raj and I would like to wish all of our wonderful friends here a very, very Merry Christmas. We all deserve to set the world’s burdens aside and simply embrace the beauty and miracle that is Christmas.            

We send our love to each of you and wish you all a wonderful Christmas. Fill it to the brim with all the merry and the bright you can muster. For we are blessed.

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And even though it’s Christmas it’s still Caturday, so:

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Friday, December 24, 2021

Christmas Eve 2021

My Christmas Eve posts of the past have been some of my favorites, starting with the very first one in 2009. You remember - the year the Obama’s decided they simply must continue their family tradition (est. 2008) of spending 2 weeks over Christmas at a luxury resort in Hawaii on somebody else’s (ours) dime. Raj did a short video of that trip that I think I’ve used every Christmas Eve hence so tradition demands I use it again. Mele Kalek-Obama: (iMotus, make several cameos in this short musical so watch for me!)

Amazingly the opening sentence in that 2009 post is still mostly true, only the dates have changed:  

Santa and his elves are hanging around D.C. just long enough this morning to vote on how much they’re going to charge for shipping and handling on this year’s free gifts.

Then there was the year that the seeds of the BLM movement were sown and it became clear that there was no winning the Left’s race war.

I can’t keep up with the ever shifting sands of racism and political correctness. One day Santa is okay, butt his sidekick, Black Pete is unacceptable. The next day it’s Santa himself is unacceptable: too white, too fat, too privileged:

white chocolate santa

In the twinkle of an eye, only black Santas matter:

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Some years we did mostly recipes and cute stuff to eat and drink:

elf cupcake

marshmallow polar bearsinstructions here

Or sometimes I focused on highly inedible cute stuff like these adorable Marshmallow Men that came with their own Christmas story.

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Warning! Cute little men made of confections are NOT, repeat, NOT edible!!!! And likely not a good idea if wee ones are around. Those wacky magazine editors in the 60s – they had absolutely no regard for human life.

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I’ve tried to keep Christmas Eve as politics-free as possible, but that grew more difficult as the country’s deep divide grew ever deeper and people began to dread even seeing certain rpeople/relatives over the holidays:

I see the country is as divided over Hallmark movies as it is over politics. It’s like asking people whether your  eggnog/Tom and Jerry should be dusted with nutmeg or cinnamon.

Of course your Dem and Never-Trumper relatives think that everything, including Christmas, is about President Trump. Remember Newsweek’s top Christmas week story back in 2017?  How Trump and the Nazis Stole Christmas To Promote White Nationalism. Things have only grown worse since then so let’s hope families either abstain from discussing politics or simply refuse to engage in bait-setting scenarios with warring members of their tribe. A truce for Mom’s sake would be nice.

Then last year came the cooties.

Alas, COVID has pretty much solved that problem in most blue states for us. By more or less banning Christmas gatherings of more than 6 people it should be easy to avoid bumping elbows with the enemy camp this year. But do pay attention as that is how the left prefers to settle all grievances: strictures and mandates.

And if our betters get their way they’ll never leave. And that brings us to Christmas Eve Present doesn’t it? Progressives are still rallying around the Day of Grievances (now expanded to every day) and (surprise!) some locales still are still under strictures and mandates that some want to expand and worsen.

Raj and I have decided to Christmas in our Rocky Mountain bunker, where we are currently under a 3 day heavy snow storm warning. It’s the first time ever, and only the second time – last year being the first as Raj was still having issues with knee replacement #1 – that we haven’t done Christmas with large extended families. Since we’ve never been here for Christmas I don’t have any actual Christmas decorations here. I spent more than an entire day unstringing/restringing 2 pre-wired Christmas trees I bought nearly 20 years ago that stopped working maybe 5 years ago. I’m convinced they were wired by institutionalized psychotic Chinese slaves. Raj took pity on me and helped with the second tree. There are no ornaments and they are sloppily strung, but it’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas around here.

trees3Charlie Brown has nothing over me. Oh, and I hate LED lights

So now that my “decorating” is done I’m going to make cookies and hot chocolate.

As for Christmas Eve Future  - well, who knows?  I say we all go to sleep tonight with hope in our hearts and dream a little dream. Maybe, just maybe there really is a Santa Claus out there to grant our wishes. 

[santa_monkey2%255B5%255D.jpg]Merry Christmas Eve Janice the Elder, wherever you are!

I wish you all good health, good travels, good friends and good cheer and a very Merry Christmas Eve, wherever your sleigh may take you.

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Thursday, December 23, 2021

This Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things: Socialist Christmas Edition

Weren’t we just talking about Sweden’s Gävle goat aka Gävlebocken 2 weeks ago? Why, yes, we were.

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Unfortunately, Sweden's giant straw yule goat is like catnip for arsonists; it’s been torched again.

sweden yulegoat burning 2001

The Gävle Goat spokesperson says she doesn't understand why people want to destroy it. I see her point, BLM doesn’t even have a field office in Gävle. A lot of people just shrug it off as part of the tradition. Socialists - of all colors and stripes – do seem to enjoy destroying tradition.

washington statueAppropriately enough, this defaced statue stood in Druid Park

The problem might be the Swedes commitment to postmodern deconstructionism. The very first year the goat  statue was installed (1966) someone burned it down on New Year's Eve. Through the years assassins - one dressed as Santa Claus and one as a gingerbread man — have shot the goat with burning arrows, doused it with accelerant or simply flicked their Bic. In 2010, someone attempted to abduct it with a helicopter. And in years where it’s too damp with snow they’ve been known to resort to smashing and stomping it to death, the ultimate expression of disapproval. During its 53-year-history, the goat has only survived unscathed 15 times.

sweden-yulegoatThe bones of the goat are all that remain after the torching

Some people have suggested that perhaps the whole concept of a horned, cloven hoofed animal representing Christmas is what drives grown men (current suspect arrested is 40) to vandalism. Nah, I’m going with it’s the socialism. 

fox-news-tree-on-fire-2-.pngWarning: progressives remain deeply committed to bringing socialism to our shores.

Socialism is why we can’t have nice things anymore. I don’t want to be more like Sweden.I want to be more like America (was). And remember: Rudy the Red-nosed Reindeer is also a horned, cloven hoofed animal representing Christmas. Don’t shoot Rudy with arrows.

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Wednesday, December 22, 2021

3 Days Till Christmas: Let’s See Your Eggs

joy tot he world birdie

It’s feather and hens day around here.

eggs chicken

So, with apologies to Robert Herrick, allow me to say:

Gather ye eggs while ye may.

Old time is still a-flying;

And this same egg that smiles today

Tomorrow will be fryin’

  

Let’s see some Christmas Day breakfast recipes from you slackers: for goodness sake there’s only 3 days to make our plans!  I’ve posted my Pear Gruyere Strata a zillion times already, there must be  other festive Christmas breakfast make-ahead dishes out there. Let’s see them. Otherwise we’ll be stuck noshing Grinch kabobs again.

christmas grinch kabobs

Tuesday, December 21, 2021

Winter Solstice 2021

It has come to my attention that today is Winter Solstice in the northern hemisphere: the planet’s tilt brings the South Pole closest to the sun meaning the North Pole is tilted away from the sun,hence the Arctic Circle is shrouded in darkness for nearly a full day and the rest of the northern hemisphere experiences the longest night of the year.

CLEAR WINTER NIGHt web

Of course that means that today also marks the beginning of lengthening days and shortening nights – so yay. And as for Joey and his “dark winter” well, put it where the sun don’t shine.

Anyway, it being December 21st (and happy birthday to my nephew and sister-in-law) that means that there are only 4 days till Christmas and I find myself here in the snowy mountains with no tree, no decorations, no plans or supplies for Christmas dinner and still suffering a bit from the trip, the altitude and the lack of humidity. One simply does not pluck a flat-lander from a state surrounded on 3 sides by water and plop them into a high mountain desert with zero humidity and expect their sinuses not to revolt.

But like a withered flower placed in a vase of warm water I’m slowly rehydrating. The whole house humidifier takes a full day to spread it’s moisture about and I forgot to turn the portable humidifier in the bedroom on the night we arrived and suffered for it all day yesterday. Things are much better today, thankfully, as I have a lot of shopping and errands and trimming and other Christmas tasks to tend to.

So even if it’s not cold and snowy where you are, may your solstice be beautiful, hushed and solemn.

     Copy of The cold was our pride, the snow was our beauty. It fell and fell, lacing day and night together in a milky haze, making everything quieter as it fell, so that winter seemed to partake of religion in a way no other season did, hushed, solemn. ~ Pa

And may your Christmas plans make themselves. Since I don’t think mine will I need to get my butt in gear. Those cookies aren’t going to bake themselves. Especially without any sugar, flour or butter in the house.

scottie dog cookiesAren’t they cute?

Okay, unless you’re Robin, these cookies aren’t going to get made at all. I’ll be lucky to squeeze out a few Spritz.

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Monday, December 20, 2021

Time to Hunker In The Bunker

We landed at the Rocky Mountain bunker yesterday afternoon. We were blessed with 3 days of fair skies and no weather events other than the usual wind gusts of 60 mph going over the Continental Divide between Cheyenne and Rawlins WY. 

I can report a few things from the road: gas is expensive everywhere, even in Wyoming where it was once a fraction of the price in other states. As the bargain prices began to disappear a few years back I can only assume their legislature passed a higher gas tax.

It’s hard to believe there is a shortage of truck drivers. In all the years we’ve travelled the I-80 corridor east to west I’ve never seen more semis on the road than this trip. We left on Friday and encountered  an unbroken line of tractor trailers on I-94 from Detroit to Chicago and it didn’t thin out much from there. Saturday, generally a light day for truck traffic, was more of the same from Iowa to Cheyenne. Sunday, more of the same in Wyoming which in the past is a wasteland with little traffic any day of the week. Maybe that’s why they raised their gas tax.

Otherwise the labor shortage seems real. A quick milk, eggs, bread run to the local grocery store upon arrival revealed that they are offering jobs at $24 an hour to handle incoming freight – that’s nearly $50,000/yr to move boxes of food from a truck to the storage area. And I will guarantee you the sign will remain up for weeks if not months. People  around here didn’t like to work even before the cooties provided government bonuses to stay home.

While there were people in masks, masks everywhere I’m pleased to report the vast majority of Americans appear to have eschewed them in favor of free face.

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And finally, I can state categorically that I’m getting too old for this. I’m still exhausted this morning although I went to bed on EST not MST, Also, I’m still feeling a wee bit oxygen deprived, although that could be due to a caffeine deficiency as well. So after my coffee and a post my immediate plans are to go back to bed.

I do hope you’ve all got your Christmas plans in place and have completed your Christmas shopping as time is growing short. 

christmas shopping time line

Sunday, December 19, 2021

Let’s Go Brandon: Christmas Edition

The real cause of the “supply chain problem” threatening to muck up Christmas this year has been revealed.

Christmas supply change

To make matters worse Santa tested positive for the cooties and has been placed in isolation for 10 days so won’t be able to make the rounds this Christmas Eve. The powers-that-be replaced him with Brandon, who doesn’t seem quite up to the task as he can’t find his way out of a brown paper bag with a bread crumb trail leading the way. 

And the eight tiny reindeer? They’ve been replaced by the best team of donkeys Brandon could find for his fantasy flight: Inflation, Immigration, Taxation, Stagflation, Cancellation, Negation, Agitation and one tiny Haitian.

My suggestion: Do your own shopping this year; and don’t leave your gifts under the tree this Christmas Eve as Brandon is more likely to take your presents than he is to leave them. He gets confused these days you know.

LET’S GO BRANDON!