Saturday, June 1, 2013

Nixon-Obama: Twin Sons of Different Mothers???

It’s not as if I didn’t warn you about Big Guy’s similarities to Dick Nixon a long time ago (Obama’s Brother From Another Mother).

nixon-obama menage-a-trois-watermark copynixOn

It’s just that, suddenly, everybody seems to have spontaneously discovered that Tricky Dick has been reincarnated as Cocky Baracky. Despite coming from different political parties (and mothers), BO is a Xerox copy of Dick - only in negative.

nixon obama pointing copy Viewing them in negative removes race from the picture - leaving just the malevolence

Butt let’s run through a few of the specifics involving their duplicative selves, shall we?

  • Milhous opened the door to Communist China, a sworn enemy of the U.S., resulting in an influx of new immigrants:

cute_panda_family_enjoys_the_first_snow_08

  • Barry opened the door to Fundamental Islam, our sworn enemy, resulting in another influx of new immigrants:

boston bombers

 

  • Dickie gave us the EPA, Barry showed us how to use the EPA to smite your enemies

Obama-Kills-Big-Oil-SC

and reward your friends.

obama-green-energy-failures

  • While running for a second term, someone, with or without Dick’s knowledge or permission, had “plumbers” break into DNC headquartes at the Watergate and collect “opposition research.” Also, the plumbing team broke into the office of Daniel Ellsberg’s psychiatrist to get dirt to use to discredit the leaker of the Pentagon papers. Oh, and he also had the IRS audit some of the people on his enemies list.

 

  • Barry, on the other hand definitely didn’t know about his good friend and Attorney General’s DOJ department spying on the journalists who were just going about their job of reporting on what government leakers (previously known as a “whistleblowers”) disclosed. In fact, Ricky may or may not even have known about it himself. Nobody around here keeps anybody in the loop. It’s policy. Ipso fatso, Big Guy clearly couldn’t have known about the low level agents at the IRS who took it upon themselves to squelch the money raising ability of conservative groups before the 2012 election by holding up their 501(c)4 applications. Heck, even their immediate bosses didn’t know about that!

 

  • Tricky Dickie’s secretary accidentally erased some of the White House tape recordings which may or may not have incriminated the President in the Watergate cover-up.

dike and rosemary

  • Barry’s Secretary fell and got a bump on her head, and as a result couldn’t remember anything before the election, and very little afterwards.

bo and hilThe secretary’s oath: stand by your man, no matter what.

hillary-nixon-farewellWait a minute…that’s not right.Is it?

Oh, and that reminds me: Barry also has that little Benghazi bump in the road thing going on; about leaving our embassy unprotected. Unfortunately it resulted in the deaths of Ambassador Stevens and 3 of his attach├ęs. And then there was the cover-up – which they always say is worse than the scandal, butt in this instance that can hardly be said to be the case. Even the Nixter never did anything close to this egregious: he killed a few reputations, butt there were never any bodies.  Big Guy really is unprecedented. Historical.

Anyway, I’m just saying Barry and Dickie do seem to share a lot of qualities, over and above them both being left-handed (natch), bad golfers (just not enough time to practice) with a proclivity for asserting Executive Privilege.

Screenshot Studio capture #1127“I’m never playing this stupid course again. I’ll take a Mulligan.”

In fact, you might say that if Richard Milhous Nixon had a son, he would have looked just like Barack Hussein Obama:

Screenshot Studio capture #1126

Or at least acted just like him.

obama nixon“Don’t worry son, they won’t have you to kick around much longer.”

Oh, and I nearly forgot: both Dick and BO had/have wives who totally rocked the golden girl look:

    pat nixon inauguralmo oslo

There are also unsubstantiated rumors about them both drinking a bit too much as well (the FLOTUS’ that is). Butt who can blame them?

Linked By: Doug Powers on Michelle Malkin, and Larwyn’s Linx on Doug Ross@Journal, and Colleen Hunt on facebook, and BlogsLucianneLoves, and Free Republic, Thanks!

Cross-Posted on Patriot Action Network

Friday, May 31, 2013

Obama: Putting the sophist back in sophistry

“'Twas brillig, and the slithy toves Did gyre and gimble in the wabe – Lewis Carroll, Jaberwocky

Caution! You are entering a Spin-Zone.

generator How fast do you suppose this sucker can go?

Beleaguered Attorney General Ricky Holder’s meeting with journOlists to explain how he plans to honor freedom of the press and government transparency the next time he violates the First Amendment was not well attended. Unfortunately, the meeting on transparency was off-the-record so many of the usual mouthpieces had previous engagements.

Not a problem, as most of the “Obama-water-carrying glitterati” had been called in earlier this month for “consultation” on issues related to our persistent Scandalanche® which has negatively been effecting Big Guy’s ability to impose his will implement his “common sense solutions” to America’s nagging problems.

Butt allow me to turn this conversation over to somebody more capable of explaining the situation: Victor Davis Hansen. He’s not confused by Big Guy’s Wonderland of Jabberwocky; he just calls it rhetoric, and treats it accordingly:

After all, we have never had a president who descended the steps of Air Force One with such catlike agility, hands almost as paws lightly bouncing in synchronization with each elfish footstep.

 

“I taught Obama to Prance!” [Gerard studied Prancercizing yesterday, and again today]

president prancy pants(And now you know the real inspiration for Psy’s Gangnan Style)

Never has a commander in chief so casually, so confidently approached the podium as if he were popping open his own laptop, his jaw almost in Mussolini style thrust out, with eyes fixed three feet above the heads of the audience — all with just the right mixture of self-assurance and canned humility.

Screenshot Studio capture #1120In fact, he outdoes Benito

Never has a president so mastered the teleprompter — no easy task in itself — with just the right pauses, followed with a timely ratcheting up of passion, punctuated with a half-smile, a grimace, a laugh.

totus and potusHey you!

Never has a president mastered both the art of empty bluster and the art of bowing.

Screenshot Studio capture #1121

 

Never has a president so mastered the patois and cadences of an intended audience: with corporate CEOs, he sounds like a(n) Ivy League Citibank exec;

 

Screenshot Studio capture #1122“Get Bernanke on the phone!” 

with foreign-policy types, he can out-authenticate the multicultural experts with accentuation like “the Taleeeban” and “Pakeeestan.”

 

bo in muslim garb

Among African-Americans, he drops his g’s, affects the slight drawl of the South, inserts an old-time Southern colloquialism, and follows the mannerisms of a Rev. Wright thundering at Trinity Church.

 

obama-churchBearing witness on the campaign trail

Among Latinos, the “r” is rolled, and accent marks fall in the proper places, better than any third-generation Latino evening-television newsreader.

 

obama-hispanic-oohwee_net_Obama for el Presidente! Hecho in America!

In short, Obama is the most impressive sophist of his age.

sophistry_sophlWhat else could you expect from a community organizer demoted to president?

“If only Barack Obama had something to say…”

bo blocked by totusI am your Tabula Rasa: I can read anything TOTUS scrolls.

As they say, you really must read the whole thing: Our ‘Make No Mistake About It’/'Let Me Be Perfectly Clear’ President.

totus shattersA freeze frame captures the precise moment TOTUS realizes that everything he’s scrolling is pure sophistry. And not even good sophistry at that.

REMEMBER: “THERE IS NO POTUS WITHOUT TOTUS!”

TOTUS-220x220l_png_copy[3]

Linked By: American Digest, and Bookworm Room, and Andrea Shea-King, Laurie Guthrie, Kevin Kramer, Mark Paquette on facebook, and BlogsLucianneLoves, and Free Republic, Thanks!

Cross-Posted on Patriot Action Network

Thursday, May 30, 2013

No, Not Here - Over There: Lady M’s Got Veggies! Shiny!

issa redactedTransparency: redacted

My Administration is committed to creating an unprecedented level of openness in Government. We will work together to ensure the public trust and establish a system of transparency, public participation, and collaboration. Openness will strengthen our democracy and promote efficiency and effectiveness in Government. – WhiteHouse.gov

What’s going on with the most transparent Administration ever in the history of the world?

While at the FEC Lois Lerner practiced extortion? The DOJ is spying on journalists doing their job? The IRS is harassing conservative Republicans? Homeland Security is “monitoring” peaceful Tea Party protests?

It almost sounds like your government is trying to intimidate you into not doing things they don’t want you to do,

tea

and make you do things they do want you to.

obamacare gunThe long gun of the law: the only gun allowed

I don’t know about your olfactory gland, butt mine is picking up the wiff of…dare I say it?…tyranny.

It smells like the full force of the Federal Government bringing it’s heavy steel-toed boot to the throat of the little people. What! Wait a minute! Isn’t that the purview of…the jack-booted right wing?

left wing addresses right wingHey you! “The Rest of the American People”  Wake up!!! Smell the coffee. Or something.

Yikes! We’ve got a new federal police force? At Homeland Security? Is that in the Constitution? Well at least now we know what they’re doing with all those bullets they’ve sucked off the market and out of your cold, dead hands.

Butt none of that is really “news”. Let’s turn our attention now to where your government wants it to be: on Lady M’s amazing charms and her magical organic Garden of Good and Evil.

Michelle Obama Michelle Obama Hosts White MOCdsY_VV6sx

That’s right boys and girls! It’s already time for our first official “summer” garden harvest! [Note: in Washington D.C. “summer” – like everything else - arrives when we say so, or when it’s convenient for our agenda.] So - bring on the little children and the smelly fruits of our labor:

Michelle Obama i don't want to smell the fennel  I don’t want to smell your stinky fennel; you smell it.

Michelle Obama Michelle Obama Hosts White f2-Z64DiUbgx

Michelle Obama I think I'm going to hurlEeuuu! Smells like mendacity to me.

Meanwhile, Lady M took her considerable charms to Boston yesterday to raise $600,000 at a fundraiser for Rep. Ed Markey - who never met a tax increase he didn’t like. For $37,600 a pop, supporters got a gourmet lunch and the opportunity to hear words of wisdom from both Senate candidate Markey:

“The first lady is a symbol of our future,” Markey told reporters outside the fundraiser at the Taj Boston. “She inspires millions of Americans, millions of people around the world, on a daily basis.”

And Lady M herself:

Inside the hotel, Obama told the crowd, “if you want to have my husband’s back, you need to support” Markey, according to a tweet from Carl Nilsson, Markey’s field director.

As always, fans like Andrea McLeod, a retired business consultant, eagerly stood in line for hours for the opportunity to shell out her money to see Lady M: 

“Anybody who grows vegetables in the White House garden has my vote,” she said.

Thanks Andrea, butt Lady M isn’t running for anything just yet. Although if that’s how you feel, I can introduce you to a few of your candidates for the U.S. Senate: Carlos, Diego and Manuel.

    hi-migrant-workers-852-8col li-migrant-00529585manuel

Linked By: Larwyn’s Linx on Doug Ross@Journal, and Cole Gaskins, Mireille Buser, Rock Searle, Steven P. Duhon, on facebook, and BlogsLucianneLoves, and Free Republic, Thanks!

Cross-Posted on Patriot Action Network

Wednesday, May 29, 2013

Scarlet O’Clinton?

Did you hear about the movie they’re making about Big Guy’s old Secretary? They haven’t settled on a name for it just yet; “Rodham” was under consideration until someone worried it might be confused with the other Secretary of State serving alongside Hill.

Screenshot Studio capture #1117Tag Team: Hill meets with South Korea while Rodman meets with North

“A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Koran” was briefly considered, butt rejected for its blatant religious overtones.

Screenshot Studio capture #1118

The working title for now is “The Godmother.”

the godmother-cropped copy

Actresses currently being considered to play the part of Hillary, any of whom would be fine:

hillary-clinton-biopic-casting-400x300

Butt I’d like to hit the Hillary reset button,

reset_button090324

and broaden the search, so to speak. What’s wrong with Barbra Streisand?

She’s already done the early Hillary:

      clintons-dancingbabs bobby beach

and I think she could easily handle the old Hillary:

                              Barbara-Streisandhill drudge

And why not Lady Gaga?

0701-lady-gaga-hillary-credit

Or Rebecca De Mornay? She does a pretty good Hill:

rebecca demornay

159932729“You’re dead to me!”

And no need to be America-centric here; Emmanuelle Riva could likewise fill the bill, so to speak. So what if she’s 83? We don’t discriminate on the basis of age.

         Hillary Clinton Barack Obama President United iAjPIsreeWMlwow-that was a bad flu hillary

And come to think of it, we don’t discriminate based on sex either. Why not Billy Chrystal?

                              crystal2la-ol-who-cares-what-hillary-clinton-paul-ryan-001

Or Bobby Redford? He was born to play an old lesbian.

                              robert redfordobama-hillary-jarret

Wait - I think you want to see the full length shot of this:

headscarf hil

There are so many others likewise talented and capable butt, heh, again, here are the current top contenders: Scarlett, Amanda, Reese, and Jessica.

actresses

Scarlet is in the lead simply because I think Hills has an affinity with the original Scarlett character – Scarlett O’Hara. If she hadn’t already been named after Sir Edmund Hillary she would have been called “Scarlett.” Butt with any of these beauties the movie is guaranteed to win an Oscar...for “Best Makeup Artist”... (h/t: Rush...he won’t h/t: MOTUS when he uses my stuff, butt I’m bigger than that).

CLINTON INAUGURAL BALL 1993

Scarlett: As God is my witness, as God is my witness they're not going to lick me. I'm going to live through this and when it's all over, I'll never be hungry again. No, nor any of my folk. If I have to lie, steal, cheat or kill. As God is my witness, I'll never be hungry again.

And frankly, at this point, what difference does it make? Frankly, the lady doesn’t give a damn.

Linked By: American Digest, and Dave Jimenez, Clint Counts, Donald P Domke on facebook, and BlogsLucianneLoves, and Free Republic, Thanks!

Cross-Posted on Patriot Action Network