Saturday, November 24, 2012

Headband Heroines

This hasn’t been reported elsewhere, butt there was a scary moment the other day when MO BO and the Wee Wons were handing out food packages at Martha’s Kitchen (no, not THAT Martha). Big Guy got hold of something that appeared very suspicious to him: “Whoa! What have we here? It looks like a IED! Call 911! Call Secret Security! Hit the floor!

 BO SWEET POTATODad…it’s a sweet potato. You know, Mom grows them in “her garden”

I guess Big Guy’s still a little jumpy after returning from his Asian trip. I think it’s because of  the Burmese billboards that were intended as laudatory congratulations on his second historic win butt were so over-the-top that everyone said they were “creepy.”


So I’ll give you that the colors may have been a bit, shall we say - garish, butt I’d have to say they nailed the ear and smile, no?

              bo and davecreepy obama billboard 


While most Americans are getting used to BO’s big, charismatic smile, I guess the Burmese – or Myanmararians as Big Guy calls them – just weren’t quite ready for all that animal magnetism. It looks like they sided with the Twitchy crowd as far as the creepy factor was concerned:

bo mural myanmarThere, that’s much better.

I don’t blame the painter. Frankly, no artist’s rendition will ever do justice to the real thing:

College of Nanoscale Science and Engineering at the University  boNow THAT’S creepy!

In other news: guess who Lady M’s channeling these days? Oh never mind, you’ll never guess:

mo bo craig

I’ll just go ahead and tell you - that’s right! Hil!


Queen of - and still head cheerleader for - the greatly underappreciated headband!


I know Hil was always shooting for the Eva Peron look - you know, the heroic spouse:


I’m not so sure what it is with Lady M. Maybe the same thing?

    eva juan peronbo mo foreshortened

And what the heck, it’s worth a shot; it worked our okay for Madonna:

         madonna desparately seeking susanmadonna

From “Desperately Seeking Susan” to “Evita” in one short decade!

jonathon pryce maddona as perons

 As you may recall though, things didn’t end well in real life - for either Eva or Argentina.



Don’t Cry For Me, Argentina: Madonna

PS: in case you were wondering, Argentina isn’t doing any better these days: default, riots, general strikes. Butt don’t worry – it could never happen here (Tip: play the traveling music while you read this).

Now let’s everyone with any coins left in their pocket or purse get out there and shop Small Business Saturday!

Linked By: DeniseVB on The Crawdad Hole, and Godlike Productions, and BlogsLucianneLoves, and NOBO2012 on Free Republic, Thanks!

Friday, November 23, 2012

Caution: Bird Brains May Find The Story of Thanksgiving Offensive

This year Thanksgiving was marked by the issuance of a statement of infallibility:

… (the)President issued a new constitutional declaration on Thursday in which he assumed sweeping powers that will not be subject to appeal…

“The constitutional declarations, decisions and laws issued by the president are final and not subject to appeal.”

Thankfully, it came from Egyptian President Morsi, where they are accustomed to such edicts. For his part Big Guy continued his commitment to the separation of church and state and issued his own godless Thanksgiving Day message, after pardoning Cobbler and Gobbler and doing some good works for humanity at the local soup kitchen.

turkeys 3

P112410PS-0641Sorry little bro, that’s the last cherry pie and it’s mine. Give me five!

So I guess that Arab Spring really paid off, eh? The Egyptian people spoke and apparently what they said was they wanted to replace their tyrannical secular dictator with a tyrannical Islamist dictator. Like we like to say around here, elections have consequences. Get used to it.  


And I see the let’s-spoil-every-holiday crowd was busy yesterday taking offense over the message of the American Thanksgiving; complaining about the impropriety of celebrating the Pilgrims’ survival in the land of the First Peoples. Where, as the enlightened younger generation has learned in school and on NPR, the colonialists came to rape, pillage, slaughter and impose their racist imperialist values on the natives.

We should all be grateful that for one day out of the year this normally open minded, judgment-free crowd comes out of the shadows to condemn the White Imperialist holiday as a “glorification of racist barbarity” and self-righteously proclaim their hatred for the “haters.”

Nobody – and I mean NO-body – is immune from their sanctimony: not even cartoon character Charlie Brown who came under attack again this year for his racist/segregationist ways. The charge is based on the fact that Franklin, the only little character of color in the comic strip, is forced to sit all alone on one side of the table. Note also that Snoopy – the only half black/half white character, is made to cook the dinner for the otherwise all-white group.

franklin at the table_thumb[1]

Others take the criticism of Charlie Brown a step further and object to the anti-feminist overtones in the imperialist Thanksgiving production as well.  

Butt Big Guy and Lady M swore not to let the blatant racism of this holiday get in the way of their enjoyment of their uniquely secular Thanksgiving festivities with friends and family. The menu was pretty much the same as always:

Turkey (George, the Unforgiven one) and Gravy

Ham (halal?)
Cornbread Stuffing
Oyster Stuffing
Macaroni and cheese
Sweet Potatoes
Mashed Potatoes
Green Bean Casserole
Dinner Rolls


Banana Cream Pie
Pumpkin Pie
Apple Pie
Sweet Potato Pie
Huckleberry Pie
Cherry Pie

(Six kinds! One for each swing state that sweetened up the ballot box)

So even though BO pardoned two very lucky turkeys, we ate another one and spit-roasted one very unfortunate pig,



Today everyone around here has moved on to football and basketball with brother Craig and team Oregon who joined us for yesterday’s pig fest:


I thought you all might be more in the mood to watch A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving. If you do, be sure to take notes as you notice for the first time all the subtle racism, sexism and otherwise insensitive treatment of special interest groups embedded in this American classic. Because remember: we’re all racists in our hearts. And only by exposing and picking at the scab of racist politics will be be able to maintain that position, and our power over the majority for the coming decades. So thank you for participating.

charlie brown2_thumbCharlie Brown: International Symbol of the Evil Empire

Now playing, the original, unedited version of A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving. Caution: contains scenes that may be inappropriate and offensive to some.

A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving

h/t: American Glob via Doug Ross

Enjoy your leftovers.

Linked By: Larwyn’s Linx on Doug Ross@Journal, and BlogsLucianneLoves, and NOBO2012 on Free Republic, Thanks!

Thursday, November 22, 2012

Thanksgiving 2012


…and in addition to all the other blessings

you have conferred on my reflective frame

I wish to thank you, Lord,

for the companionship of steadfast comrades

whose wit and wisdom and strength

help steer me through these tempestuous seas


of flattery and lies churned to fury by the ill will of demagogues. 



A special thanks to all who visit here. I wish you all a peaceful, happy Thanksgiving – because there is always, always, always something to be thankful for.


Linked By: BlogsLucianneLoves, and NOBO2012 on Free Republic, Thanks!

Wednesday, November 21, 2012

Pardoning Our Turkeys

Here I am, back in time for Thanksgiving. You’ll be relieved to hear, as was I, that my checkup at Langley yesterday located no viruses or otherwise invasive programs in my circuit boards so I’m cleared to continue my assignment at the Big White for now. Apparently  my firewall is holding. (h/t to Raj!)

And there is so much to be thankful for around here. Take the other day for example; Lady M took time out of her busy post-reelection schedule to celebrate the arts and humanities in a recycled Zero + Maria Cornejo frock with our signature boob belt.

mo boob and ankle belts

To update the look from the first wearing, we matched it up this time around with ankle belts as well, and midnight blue/black nail polish with the new squared-off nail tip look. Very au courant.

  mo's lovely ankle braceletsmo's hand scar and black nail polish

Big Guy got back late last night from his very successful, if boring, ASEAN conference.

    bo cambodian shirt asean summitbo yawn

With Hillary dispatched to the Mideast to clean up the latest mess resulting in “Palestinians being massacred all week” (if you believe Whoopi-lodge–accusations-first-ask-for clarification-of-facts-later-Goldberg) Big Guy is freed up to handle more pressing matters of state. Such as pardoning the official White House turkeys later this afternoon.

I thought originally the pardons might include some of the rather large bird brains around here:


Butt I guess it’s just Cobbler and Gobbler, this year’s not-for-Thanksgiving-dinner birds sent in for today’s Big White photo op.

cobbler gobblerCobbler and Gobbler’s press conference from their digs on the roof of the W Hotel.

Still, I’m surprised we couldn’t find at least one turkey-of-color to pardon.

Sir Pall McCartney has signaled that he, for one, is pleased to hear about Big Guy’s stay of execution for the birds even though they’re both white. As you know, Sir Pall stands with Lady M on the healthy eating front.


“Say No Thanks to Turkey,” boy, how long have people been saying THAT around here?

lubbock tx no to o

I think it’s quite understandable that somebody who shares such an affinity with turkey necks would want to spare them from the chopping block.

     M_Id_298107_Paul_McCartneymccartney turkey neck

Apparently there is a limit to what magic can be done with a scalpel after you hit the big 7-0.

Despite Sir Pall’s support of Lady M’s food police program, suffice it to say he’s not listed amongst this year’s Thanksgiving guest list (Yes, there will be turkey. And ham.).

Moving on to other pressing matters of State ahead of the Thanksgiving holiday and feast: Lady M will be “receiving” the official Big White holiday tree at 11:00 am today. I can’t wait. it’s generally the only time all year that I don’t need to worry about trying to make her butt look small.

If you catch my drift.

     christmas tree2christmas tree

Whoa! Nelly!

paulsurpriseMy! That is a big bird!

And now I must be about my Thanksgiving feast preparations. I’ll be moving around the country tomorrow through Sunday, so posts will be short. Hope everyone has a great holiday.

Linked By: Amusing Bunni on twitter, and BlogsLucianneLoves, and NOBO2012 on Free Republic, Thanks!

Tuesday, November 20, 2012

L’icon Fragile

This is going to be a shortie today as I’m on my way over to Langley to have my motherboard scanned and Little Mo is driving like a maniac.

There’s been a lot of Chinese and Iranian hacking going on around here and Big Guy want’s to be sure that all my circuits are up to snuff. So I’m going to give you L’icon Fragile to play with today. I’ll check in later to make sure you’re playing nice. Bwahahahahahahaha!

Michelle Obama: L’icon Fragile.

le icon fragile


Ok, I should have posted a “Put Down Your Beverage” warning, butt I just couldn’t help myself. I sprayed my keyboard when I read the review of this Sophie Coignard canard in Forbes, and I thought you should too.

“Warning: Put Down Your Beverage”

“Seen from France, Michelle Obama embodies the happy news: Beautiful, intelligent, funny, smiling; She has built a solid marriage and raised two delightful daughters whom she has been able to protect from the tumult and vanities of power and fame.”

So tells us the author of “Michelle Obama, L’Icone Fragile” (Fragile Icon), a recently-published book that is turbocharging the canonization of the first lady among venerated American idols like Marilyn Monroe and Audrey Hepburn.

I gave you fair warning that time, so don’t tell me I owe you a new keyboard or monitor or whatever.

I’m going to have to rely on Forbes’ analysis because I’m not wasting my hard earned dough I don’t have any more room on my Kindle, butt the “Lady M is a fragile icon” notion is a little at odds with what my hard drive returns when I ask for “fragile Michelle”:



What does your hard drive give you?

See you later!

Monday, November 19, 2012

We’re all Thai/Burmese/Myanmar Now

Big Guy took his FORWARD! campaign to Southeast Asia this weekend.

At his presser in Thailand yesterday, BO explained how he’s planning to deport the American System to the Near East:

bo cheersThai Prime Minister Yingluck Shinawatra: main reason Lady M did not attend. Plus she hates Thai food.

And so scientific exchanges, medical exchanges, working together on development issues -- all of that becomes very important. And because Thailand I think is more successful economically than some of its neighbors, it's now in a position to be a donor country.

Got that Thailand?


You didn’t build that on your own! Somebody else made that happen! Now it’s time to spread your wealth around.

Although the presser was in Bangkok, we had one of our cub reporters positioned to pose a question about the Israeli “situation” so Big Guy could get our official position on record so Bebe will stop bothering him :

Well, let me start with Gaza. Let’s understand what the precipitating event here was that’s causing the current crisis, and that was an ever-escalating number of missiles; they were landing not just in Israeli territory, but in areas that are populated. And there’s no country on Earth that would tolerate missiles raining down on its citizens from outside its borders. So we are fully supportive of Israel’s right to defend itself from missiles landing on people’s homes and workplaces and potentially killing civilians. And we will continue to support Israel’s right to defend itself.

Wow! Brave words! Butt let’s just leave it at that as you have the right to remain silent, and anything you do say can and will be used against you in the future.

Now, what is also true is, is that we are actively working with all the parties in the region to see if we can end those missiles being fired without further escalation of violence in the region.

Got that? We’re talking to all the bullies in the ‘hood because, well, apparently they stand with Hamas - the people actually responsible for “those missiles being fired” into Israel.

palestinian militant hamasPalestinians proud to stand with Hamas

And my message to all of them was that Israel has every right to expect that it does not have missiles fired into its territory. If that can be accomplished without a ramping-up of military activity in Gaza, that’s preferable; that’s not just preferable for the people of Gaza, it’s also preferable for Israelis -- because if Israeli troops are in Gaza, they’re much more at risk of incurring fatalities or being wounded.

Boy, it’s hard to argue with logic like that! The Thais got to witness first hand exactly why people everywhere say Big Guy is the smartest man ever elected to the American Presidency. He went on to explain that the Arab Spring was not responsible for this latest skirmish:

In terms of the impact of the Arab Spring, let’s just remember that the exact same situation arose just a couple of years ago, before the Arab Spring. So I don’t think anybody would suggest somehow that it’s unique to democratization in the region that there’s a conflict between the Israelis and the Palestinians. That’s been going on for several decades now.

True, butt before the Arab Spring few stood with Hamas: just Palestine and NPR. Now it looks like they have coalesced many allies: Egypt, Turkey, Sudan, Qatar, Tunisia, Libya, probably Syria and Jordan. It would seem that the Muslim Brotherhood isn’t representing the “religion of peace” particularly well.

Morsi-Ahmadinejad1-450x324Welcome to the neighborhood, brother

Of course before the Arab Spring, Hamas was not nearly as well armed:

Just a few years ago, Palestinian rockets were limited to crude devices manufactured in Gaza. But in recent years, Israeli officials say, Hamas and other armed groups have smuggled in sophisticated, longer-range rockets from Iran and Libya, which has been flush with weapons since Moammar Gadhafi was ousted last year.

hamas-rocket-threat-against-israel-gaza-strip-terrorist-militantsThey’re back! Bigger and badder than ever!

And then it was on to the primary reason for the trip: a victory lap, if you will, in Burma:  All hail, Caesar!

The gates, topped with barbed wire, swung open and a black presidential limousine pulled into the driveway. Out stepped President Obama, pressing his hands together and bowing ever so slightly — a gesture the Burmese democracy leader, dressed in a green scarf, peach blouse and black sarong, returned.

bo bow“I’ll have the Pad Thai, not too spicy.”

They shook hands, and then another figured rushed forth and hugged her in a long, emotional embrace. It was Secretary of State Hillary Rodham Clinton, and outside gates, a crowd had gathered and could be heard chanting: “Obama! Freedom!”


Imagine the audacity to HOPE Burma nee Myanmar might one day be a bastion of democracy? And imagine the audacity of someone who says that Big Guy is taking credit for the ground work done by the Bush administration; treasonous! To imply that Bush had anything to do with it I mean.

President Obama will surely laud these reforms, enjoying a rare moment of foreign-policy success, when he visits Rangoon as part of a three-day Southeast Asia tour. Yet Burma's political calculations had little to do with Mr. Obama or with Secretary of State Hillary Clinton. The country's change instead was prompted by—steady yourself, Foggy Bottom—the administration of George W. Bush, who put in place a diplomatic framework that nudged Burma in the right direction when the generals were finally ready to embrace reform.

The Bush foreign policy placed a strong emphasis on human rights and instituted a multilateral effort to pressure the junta… the Bush team also maintained sanctions against the junta's leaders and steered humanitarian assistance to the Burmese people as best they could.

When the Obama crew took over the State Department, they "reviewed" these policies for months—and then discovered that the status quo was quite appealing.(snip)

The Bush sanctions were left intact too…(and) the Obama team "agreed to begin a dialogue—a senior level dialogue with the government—but also with opposition groups, ethnic minority groups, all of the people who have an important role to play in the country's future."

This was also just a continuation of policy that Mr. Obama inherited.

So maybe that’s why Big Guy didn’t spike the football during his visit to Burma.Oh wait; I guess he did. It looks like we just got the speech writers from State together with the campaign team and wrote a speech that managed to pander flatter every minority faction in the country, while taking credit for every positive thing that has happened in the past 4 years:

When I took office as President, I sent a message to those governments who ruled by fear. I said, in my inauguration address, “We will extend a hand if you are willing to unclench your fist.” And over the last year and a half, a dramatic transition has begun, as a dictatorship of five decades has loosened its grip.(snip) Hundreds of prisoners of conscience have been released, and forced labor has been banned. Preliminary cease-fires have been reached with ethnic armies, and new laws allow for a more open economy.

So today, I’ve come to keep my promise and extend the hand of friendship. America now has an Ambassador in Rangoon, sanctions have been eased, and we will help rebuild an economy that can offer opportunity for its people, and serve as an engine of growth for the world.(snip)

When your talents are unleashed, then opportunity will be created for all people.

Funny, I wonder why he doesn’t think that sort of thing would work so well around here?


Oh, here’s why; they won’t get to keep their ill-gained profits either:

And now, as more wealth flows into your borders, we hope and expect that it will lift up more people. It can’t just help folks at the top. It has to help everybody. And that kind of economic growth, where everybody has opportunity — if you work hard, you can succeed — that’s what gets a nation moving rapidly when it comes to develop.

It only works when everybody has a fair shot. Everyone get’s a fair deal. (And the 2% pays their fair share, which is currently around 60% of total income taxes I think.

Anyway, next, Big Guy schooled them on how democracy works:

Now, America may have the strongest military in the world, but it must submit to civilian control. I, as the President of the United States, make determinations that the military then carries out, not the other way around. As President and Commander-In-Chief, I have that responsibility…

We’ve tasted the bitterness of civil war and segregation, but our history shows us that hatred in the human heart can recede; that the lines between races and tribes fade away. And what’s left is a simple truth: e pluribus unum — that’s what we say in America. Out of many, we are one nation and we are one people. And that truth has, time and again, made our union stronger.

Wow! Really!? You could have fooled me!


It has made our country stronger. It’s part of what has made America great.

war on women

And how sometimes it doesn’t:

We amended our Constitution to extend the democratic principles that we hold dear. And I stand before you today as President of the most powerful nation on Earth, but recognizing that once the color of my skin would have denied me the right to vote. And so that should give you some sense that if our country can transcend its differences, then yours can, too.

Did you see how he did that? Made it about him? That’s political genius right there, folks.

bostar3There’s only one star on this stage

Odd though, some people don’t seem to recognize a political rock star when they see one.

bo aungEeeuuu! Back away!

Have they been living under a rock or something for the past 4 years?

bibi's bombOr something.

Linked By: Larwyn’s Linx on Doug Ross@Journal,  and, BlogsLucianneLoves, and NOBO2012 on Free Republic, Thanks!