What a Hoser, eh?

No, I’m not going to post the cute video of Sandy O.C. and her college friends dancing to Listomania. It is cute, and it was made 10 years ago when “lip-dubbing” videos were all the rage. But let it serve as a warning to the children of the social media age who plan on ruling the world some day: the innertubes are forever.

So today I’m going to help Jettie G shoulder the responsibility of making fun of Canada’s socialist-open-borders Prime Minister. The article comes compliments of Ed Driscoll who titles all of his coverage of our neighbors to the north as DISPATCHES FROM PRIME MINISTER ZOOLANDER: Trudeau demands organic garden, apiary, treehouse (with zip line) and more for Harrington Lake residence.

And you didn’t think anyone could give the Obamas a run for their money! Wrong. But it’s a bit disheartening that Justie Fek™ isn’t a bit more original. I mean it’s one thing to emulate your idol and love object,

it’s quite another to just copy cat them straight away.

• Organic garden, check:

• Apiary, check – and don’t get excited, it’s an a-p-i-a-r-y people – bees you know, not that other thing that will end you up in Janice’s corner.

Lady M’s Bee house for her Organic Garden of Good and Evil

I wonder if JF knows he can make beer with his honey?

I’m guessing he does.

• Tree House, check, sort of. The Obamas have a house IN the trees:

Which now has a wall around it:

Even though walls are immoral.

Now a zipline, that’s original. As far as I know the Obama’s do not have a zipline, although it has been said that Michelle has her own zip code.

Butt I think that’s just an urban legend.

Anyway, Justie, what a hoser, eh?

Still, if you want to see a really cute video of one of our socialist betters dancing even our cute little Sandy will find this to be compelling competition.

Brainwashed Again Motherf*****s?

Remember when the WaPo published Willard’s op-ed criticizing President Trump? Yeah, like 2 days ago. Several pundits pointed out that this was a sure-fire way for him to become the media’s latest RINO darling, showing up favorably in print and appearing frequently on all their propaganda shows. And BAM! Just like that, there he is, squawking, on CNN yesterday. Quelle surprise! Non?

Only problem, he was backpedaling. But that’s just Mitt, being Mitt. Or Romney, being Romney. Just like his Daddy, George, who claimed he’d been brainwashed by military generals about Vietnam, Willard was brainwashed by the generalissimos of the Deep State.

Mitt and George Romney. They look like they’d be perfect on the set of Mad Men

He may have embraced the advice of Deep State tacticians a bit too soon:

It shows that his potshot against Trump bombed, particularly with Republicans, who were all out there and ready to be his friend but can now see that he's got other priorities, such as filling the towering boots of...Jeff Flake.

And then there’s Michigan’s other legacy candidate: Palestinian-America Rashida Tlaib, D-Representative of Michigan’s 13th District which includes most of the city of Detroit. She was sworn in yesterday on Thomas Jefferson’s Qu'ran, which is ironic as President Jefferson recognized the marauding “Musselmans” as a threat to civilization over 200 years ago. He got the Qu'ran to study his enemy in order to defeat the Muslim pirates from the Barbary States who were attacking American trade ships, stealing the cargo, and enslaving our sailors.

True to form Tlaib started her term sounding like a blood-thirsty Muslim pirate demanding death to the infidel’s presidency. To be clear, she did so in remarkably unladylike fashion: “We’re going to go in there and impeach the Motherf****r.” Yes, we now have an elected (Democratic, Muslim) official calling our President a “Motherf****r.” 

And we’re supposed to think Donald Trump is too crude to be president because he said “pussy?” Nah, I don’t think so. As I recall it was the Obama/Biden campaign that originally encouraged their female constituents to vote with their “lady parts.”

 

So as far as I’m concerned all bets are off “Motherf****rs”  - wait! What?  Did I just say that out loud!?!!

Please accept my apology, somebody seems to be coarsening the culture in a America. H/T Kirstin Gillibrand, Beto O'Rourke, Kamala Harris, DNC Chair Tom Perez – even Michelle!

And the last time I looked, Donald J. Trump does not own Hollywood. So I’d suggest the Left save their phony sanctimony for their own.

P.S. December Jobs Report: an additional 312,000. Economists expected 175,000. I mention it only because you won’t see it on CNN.

" What Kind of a Woman Do You Think I am…”

Churchill: "Madam, would you sleep with me for five million pounds?"

Socialite: "My goodness, Mr. Churchill... Well, I suppose... we would have to discuss terms, of course... "
Churchill: "Would you sleep with me for five pounds?"

Socialite: "Mr. Churchill, what kind of woman do you think I am?!

Churchill: "Madam, we've already established that. Now we are haggling about the price”

Yes, it’s a very old joke, variously attributed to Churchill. George Bernard Shaw and a multitude of other powerful men. We might consider adding President Donald J. Trump to that list of powerful men, with the role of “socialite” played by Congressional Democrats.

In support of my case let the record reflect that Democrats haven’t always been opposed to the concept of funding a physical barrier on the border.

Democrats haven't always had such a hard position on the border wall. Over the past decade, Democrats have supported billions of dollars in funding for physical barriers…

The current Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer voted for it, so did Hillary Clinton and Joe Biden. Then-Illinois Sen. Barack Obama praised the bill in a floor speech saying it would "certainly do some good" and "help stem some of the tide of illegal immigration in this country."

In 2013, all Senate Democrats and most House Democrats backed comprehensive immigration reform legislation...It included $46 billion for border security and around $8 billion to repair or reinforce barriers along the 700 miles of the border as required under the Secure Fence Act.…

"The Democrats don't oppose border infrastructure, they oppose President Trump," explained RJ Hauman, government affairs director for the Federation for American Immigration Reform. "It wasn't long ago that Democrats, including Schumer, supported border barriers. Now they are letting their hatred of President Trump cloud their ability to judge the merits of the proposal." – WJLA

So with the Democratic whores, it’s really not the money. It’s the custodial account.

Alternately we could cast Mitt Romney in the role of “socialite” in this little morality play.  Mitt Romney, the man who accepted - embraced even - President Trump’s endorsement of his Senate run. He loved him before he hated him. No wait, that’s not quite right: he hated him before he loved him…before he hated him.

Now, instead of taking the opportunity to help PDJT explain the logic flaw in conflating illegal entry with legal immigration Mitt chooses to attack the sitting President for not properly “shaping the character of the country.” I guess Senator Romney would prefer the country’s character be shaped in the image and likeness of a snake like himself.

 you knew what I was before you took me in

I would have preferred it if Romney was honest enough to just come out and call us Deplorables racists, like his GOPe and Democrat cohorts always do. Anyway, I guess we still don’t know the price of his principled vote, but we certainly have established his profession. I can’t quite believe I once made excuses for this viper. My only defense is that in 2012 I had no idea just how deep the Deep State roots were.

A pox on their houses.

Let Our Better Angels Prevail

“US agents fire tear gas into Mexico at 'violent mob' near border”

“US agents fire tear gas into Mexico at violent mob near border”

See the difference? One is fake news (aka propaganda) the other is just news.

“Once again we have had a violent mob of migrants attempt to enter the United States illegally by attacking our agents with projectiles. The agents involved should be applauded for handling the situation with no reported injuries to the attackers.” - Katie Waldman, Homeland Security spokeswoman

But America’s elite class has determined that you are not smart enough to noodle facts through on your own so they have implanted an education system, media system and political system to ensure you don’t get have to do that for your self.

Of course if you have been properly indoctrinated informed you are on board with the leftist billionaires who have orchestrated the complete transformation of America for their own purposes. If that’s the case then you will be down with Amnesty International’s view that protecting and enforcing our borders is a violation of human rights. You will think it quite rational for us, as a country, to follow the wishes of international agencies and international law rather than those established for our own citizens by our own citizens.

You will see no problem with people attempting to “shape reality” by using a throng of barbarians at the gate:

In addition to rock-throwers, the migrants also began to try to push women and children from among their group forward onto the border boundary, U.S. officials said, forcing some juveniles to climb over razor wire that the American government has posted in recent weeks as a deterrent to unruly crowds itching to jump the border.

Ms. Waldman said the migrants appeared to be trying to stage a photo-op of their actions in front of “conveniently invited media.” – Washington Times

And if you have been either properly indoctrinated or improperly informed you will naturally see President Trump as an agent of the  devil for trying to protect the sovereignty of our country. Unfortunately that makes you an agent of the devil, wittingly or not.

Yet - against the establishment Republicans’ choice, against the Deep State’s wishes, against the media’s choice, against all odds - America elected Donald J. Trump president. Precisely because he put America first.

"I was elected to represent the citizens of Pittsburgh, not Paris." – VSGPDJT, June, 2018

It’s almost as if our better angels prevailed.

Detail from Raphael’s ‘St. Michael Vanquishing Satan,’1518

Happy New Year! Don’t Let Those Notions of Virtuous Behavior Intrude

Happy New Year to all of my most favorite deplorables!

No, I didn’t make it till midnight, but then I barely remember the last New Year’s Eve I did. In addition to being tired around 10:30 or so I also had zero interest in watching any of the network buffoons assembled on various rooftops and concrete canyons of New York City waiting on the drop of a crystal ball.

Nevertheless, 2018 was a pretty awesome year. Expect more of the same from 2019. Here is my primary prediction for the coming year:

Dozens of dolts will announce they’re running as the Democratic candidate for president of the United States. If you thought the 2016 Republican field was deep, wait till you see that of the 2020 Democrats  – it’s more like the Grand Canyon.

Not so much because it will be awesome but because it’s a really big hole, populated with a lot of goats.

I’m not making any more predictions because I just realized they’d be mostly pessimistic which somehow doesn’t seem appropriate for a New Year post. I’m still optimistic about some things but at my age it takes infinitely more effort to convince myself that logic and circumstance warrant such irrational exuberance. So I tend to conserve my optimism these days for really important stuff, like saving the world.

It being a new year and all does give me pause to reflect on how much I do miss that bottomless, unbridled optimism of youth that convinces you, against all odds, that somehow everything will work out for the best. Only after years of experience does it dawn on you that not only is that not always true, but that sometimes what’s “for the best” isn’t necessarily what you want, or even what you think is for “your” best. Now if I could just get the Left to understand and accept that, my work would be done here.

Happy New Year!

Your Betters Always Know Better Than You Do

Year end news: the Democrats finally found an old white guy billionaire they can love. That’s right, Michael Bloomberg, the man who first ran and won New York’s mayoral race as a “Republican” and later as an Independent has decided he might want to run for President - as a Democrat! Why not run the table?

 Michael Bloomberg: demonstrating the need for his ‘Sugary Drinks Portion Cap Rule’

He’s still mad about the New York Court of Appeals throwing his statute out so he’s going to run for Head Nanny in order to right that egregious wrong. Of course he’ll have to get in line and spend a lot of money for that honor, there are a lot of nannies ahead of him.

But regardless of who wins the Democratic nomination, remember this: the size of your soda will always be more important to them than closing our borders in order to control drug running, human trafficking, disease, terrorism and millions of new welfare recipients.

Because, as this dismissive, even derisive tweet from Britain (h/t Francinepink) clearly explains, the left doesn’t believe you are capable of thinking for yourself.

So as you go about your New Year’s Eve celebration please remember to celebrate responsibly: no more than one.

And if it’s a carbonated beverage nothing over 16 ounces.

At a time.

Seize The Day

Things I never knew about when I was young enough to fully enjoy them:

December 30th is National Bacon Day. When I was younger I could eat all the bacon I wanted with neither short or long term consequences. Now I must indulge my bacon urges only periodically.

Butt if you can still afford to do so, by all means go ahead and enjoy bacon all day long. 

Breakfast:

Brunch:

Lunch:

Dinner:

Snacks:

And nightcap:

IBD (that’s International Bacon Day, not Irritable Bowel Disease) is sort of a combination of the Thanksgiving/Christmas holiday tradition of overindulging in food and the New Year’s Eve tradition of overindulging in drink. In short, the perfect storm, so don’t forget to wear your mukluks.

Nike Air Max Posite Bacon Boot

And honestly, after that lovely flush of youth has passed you by

it might be prudent to consider six degrees of separation between yourself and your bacon. Lest you end up, well, looking like this after a long day of indulgence:

But if you don’t heed my advice and wind up overindulging in bacon drinks either today or on New Year’s Eve you might want to check this out, although I filed it away under “things that would have been infinitely more useful when I was (much) younger.” Pedialyte's New Powder Packets Are Basically Made to Cure Your Hangover

Great. Now that I haven’t been awake at midnight on New Year’s Eve for 10 years. I look forward to the cure for wrinkles by the time I’m 90 as well.