Saturday, March 16, 2019

Our Jurassic Chickens Are Bigger Than Yours

People sleep peaceably in their beds at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf. – George Orwell

I confess, I’ve been a little upset ever since I saw the picture of the sheep comforting the sheepdog that had been injured by a wolf threatening his flock. I felt a little better after seeing the collars the dogs wear for protection against wolf attacks but it was still unsettling, thinking about the price our protectors pay.

Image result for sheep wolves and sheepdogs

And I thought, what if we all joined with the sheepdog in fighting our foe? Wouldn’t the wolf be completely vanquished? I didn’t have to wait long for an answer to my question - which was  “yes” - from, of all places,  France!

A fox was killed by a group of killer chickens that ganged up on the intruder in northeast France after it sneaked into the henhouse:

A fox in a henhouse got way more than it bargained for when a group of killer chickens turned the tables on their traditional foe and pecked it to death.

The henhouse was located at an agricultural school in France and the fox likely entered the coop at dusk last week and got trapped inside as hatch doors close when the sun goes down.

If French chickens can pull this off, think how awesome we would be if we ever decided to gang up and kick the butt of our cultural enemies.

Image result for france yellow vests protest

Because I promise you: our Jurassic chickens are bigger than yours.

Image result for brahma chicken size comparison

(whoops, forgot to include Calvin’s contribution)

Friday, March 15, 2019

Hail, Caesar!

Image result for beware the ides of marchOn this day in 44 BC Caesar was assassinated on the steps of the Roman Senate.

Mind you, it was just 2 short years ago when the Left thought it a good idea to perform a modern day version of Shakespeare’s Julius Caesar with a Trump-like character in the designated role of the dead Caesar. CNN couldn’t have been more onboard, giving the Shakespeare in the Park production free promotion:

This was defended as “free speech.” Yet the same cabal seeks to outlaw something called “hate speech.” Dead President portrayals don’t qualify as “hate speech” because 1) it’s “art” and 2) it’s aimed at the the old white patriarchy. But the bottom line is it gets a pass under the guise of “art” - in the same way that Islam gets a pass under the guise of “religion.”

While I condemn the Mosque killings in New Zealand, as all civilized people must, I see no difference from Jews being targeted in a synagogue or Christians being targeted in a church. So if we are going to go nuclear against “hate crimes” aimed at religions I would expect the same sort of vociferous condemnation against attacks on other faiths. So lets see a little more robust censure against those spouting hateful anti-Semitic rhetoric shall we?

Image result for ilhan omar anti-semitic

Image result for ilhan omar anti-semitic tweets

Instead of leveling baseless claims of being anti-Islamic and racist against our President, because he wants to enforce our existing immigration laws.

Now, since it is FLOTUS Friday, let’s enjoy a bit of eye candy from our lovely First Lady’s previous week.

Image result for melania trumpAt the Shamrock Bowl Presentation to Taoiseach Leo Varadkar, Prime Minister of Ireland, yesterday.

Image result for melania trumpWaiting to greet Czech Republic Prime Minister Andrej Babis and his wife Monika Babisova, March 8.

 Visiting Microsoft last week

Image result for melania trumpVisiting tornado devastated parts of Arkansas last week: note this is the real Melania, not her body double as widely reported on MSM.

Bonus time capsule entry: At last year’s Shamrock Bowl Presentation to the Irish Prime Minister:

Image result for melania trump st patrick's dayLast year we were blessed with Global Warming on St. Patrick’s Day, this year we’re in the throws of the “Bomb Cyclone”

Image result for hail70 million in the path of “bomb cyclone” bringing snow, hail and rain

Hail, Caesar!

Thursday, March 14, 2019

Shut Your Pi Hole and Have a Slice

Happy Pi Day. ABC News assembled this informational video to mark the date (3-14) that represents Alfred Einstein’s birthday and the first 3 digits of an infinite number:

The accompanying article chronicles the saga of the Indiana amateur mathematician who once convinced the  Indiana legislature to introduce a bill defining pi as 3.2. It nearly passed. While an interesting story of the lack of mathematical knowledge - even a century ago - the comments on the article prove even more enlightening. As of this morning Every. Single. Comment. on the thread was some sort of disdainful swipe at the intelligence of President Trump and/or his supporters.

Unfortunately that’s where we find the country on Pi Day, 2019; the only constant is Trump hate.

Image result for trump pieOrange-man pie bad!

So in an attempt to heal the deep rift that divides America I would like to propose that we leave mathematics out of the equation all together and change Pi Day to Pie Day. Millions of people, including the Fox and Friends morning crew, apparently think that’s what it’s about anyway so why not make it official and eliminate at least one opportunity to argue over political ideology?

Better for one day to argue about America’s favorite pie

Image result for pi day

than politics.

Because who doesn’t love pie?

Image result for chicken pot pie 3 of my favorite thingsMy 3 favorite things…

in a crust. Image result for chicken pot pieChicken. Pot. Pie.

Wednesday, March 13, 2019

Reports of the Death of Irony Are Premature

When did America lose it’s sense of humor? Sometime between 2000, when George W. won the presidency with hanging chads that led to the left’s unshakeable belief that it was a “stolen election,” and 9/11. The terrorist attack on New York immediately led to mostly leftist declarations of the end of irony, led by Graydon Carter, then editor of Vanity Fair: 

"There's going to be a seismic change. I think it's the end of the age of irony." 

At about the same time Roger Rosenblatt wrote in an essay for Time:

“One good thing could come from this horror: it could spell the end of the age of irony.”

What they meant of course was that the sort of cynicism that permeated pop culture, that mocked and dismissed any sort of extremist beliefs, was a thing of the past. Fairly soon thereafter it seemed everybody and their grandmother declared the end of irony.

As it turned out irony was not dead at all, it was just revised to exclude certain forms of extremism – all things Islamic - and redefined to identify what sorts are still okay to be cynically mocked and ridiculed: Christians, whites, conservatives. As it turned out, at the dawn of the 21st century irony did not die it just became unfunny. Unless you were a member of “the club.”

So when Jay Leno complained that late night comedy is no longer funny because it’s just too political, that’s what he meant. The “comics” can no longer provide the country with universal humor because they are more interested in sharing and airing their political beliefs and agendas than they are in providing entertainment.

Just as Bill Maher acknowledged of the “cultural appropriation” phenomenon - it’s “made up” because these people “just want to bitch,” – late night TV has turned into commercial supported bitching sessions for likeminded politicos.

Image result for npc meme

So you see, irony is far from dead.

Tuesday, March 12, 2019

If You Don’t Know Who The Mark Is…

You might think there isn’t any news here: “I’m not for impeachment.”

But you aren’t allowed to reach that conclusion on your own, leave that determination to your betters.

“This is news,” she added. “I haven’t said this to any press person before. But since you asked, and I’ve been thinking about this, impeachment is so divisive to the country that unless there’s something so compelling and overwhelming and bipartisan, I don’t think we should go down that path because it divides the country. And he’s just not worth it.”  MCN

The important point here is not that Pelosi is calling off the dogs. She isn’t really, she’s going to let them continue to sniff around, distracting the press from covering anything other than fake news for the next two years; she’s just taking the bone away. Nor is the most important point the fact that Nancy acknowledges that she and her ilk are responsible for telling journalists what is/is not news. (“This is news,” she added. “I haven’t said this to any press person before.” Ergo, how could it possibly be news?)

Actually the most critical aspect of this “news” item is that Nancy, as Glenn Reynolds put it, is “cooling the mark out.”

“After the blowoff has occurred,” Goffman explained, about the operation of a con, “one of the operators stays with the mark and makes an effort to keep the anger of the mark within manageable and sensible proportions. The operator stays behind his team-mates in the capacity of what might be called a cooler and exercises upon the mark the art of consolation. An attempt is made to define the situation for the mark in a way that makes it easy for him to accept the inevitable and quietly go home. The mark is given instruction in the philosophy of taking a loss.”New Yorker

Yes libs, you’ve been played, by your own leadership. That’s what useful idiots are for.

Image result for impeach trump demonstrationsImage result for impeach trump demonstrationsRefusniks on the March

This should prove to be very interesting; can you poke a hornets nest and expect to escape unscathed? Will the hornets just disperse peacefully? I don’t know and I’m willing to bet Nancy doesn’t either. But the best part is that now progressives can now experience what we experience on a daily basis: gaslighting.

Image result for taking impeachment off the table

Since they aren’t familiar with being on the receiving end of it, I offer them this primer on how to recognize it:

11 Warning Signs of Gaslighting.

1.   They tell blatant lies.

2.   They deny they ever said something, even though you have proof.

3.   They use what is near and dear to you as ammunition.

4.   They wear you down over time.

5.   Their actions do not match their words.

6.   They throw in positive reinforcement to confuse you.

7.   They know confusion weakens people.

8.   They project.

9.   They try to align people against you.

10. They tell you or others that you are crazy.

11. They tell you everyone else is a liar.

Trust me, once you know what’s going on it can be great fun.

Image result for Look Around the Poker Table; If You Can't See the Sucker, You're It ..."If you're playing a poker game and you look around the table and and can't tell who the sucker is, it's you." - Paul Newman

Monday, March 11, 2019

The Generation That’s Lost Its Way or “We’re All Bozos On This Bus”

I’m not blaming them, they’ve been subjected to anti-capitalism pro-Gaia propaganda since they were old enough to watch Sesame Street. They were praised for everything and nothing, collected gold stars and participation trophies without ever even having to try. They’ve been taught that the culture they were born into is nothing but the summary of 9 evil isms: Capitalism, Colonialism, Racism, Sexism, Classism, Ableism, Ageism, Heterosexism and Anti-Semitism – although that last one is now open for negotiation. Current proposal is to replace it with Islamophobia.

The five “faces” of oppression - violence, exploitation, marginalization, powerlessness, and cultural imperialism - formed the backdrop for their entire educational experience. And in case it isn’t obvious, white males were the primary source of all of the above thus leading to a generation of self-hating white guys.

So is it any wonder that so many of them emerge from their biological childhood uninformed, misinformed, and confused? Many are so unsure of their own mind and identity that they don’t even recognize themselves anymore. Take the case of the guy who raged at the MIT Technology Review article titled The hipster effect: Why anti-conformists always end up looking the same which is a recap of a Brandeis University’s research paper illustrated by a photo of a young man wearing a plaid shirt and a beanie.


Right after the article was published, MIT Technology Review promptly received an email from someone who claimed he was the man in the photo and hadn't given his consent. He accused the publication of slandering him and threatened legal action – NPR

Only problem: it wasn’t him. When the MIT journal’s editors checked the image license it turned out that the photo was of a totally different hipster…who apparently looked just like him; hence inadvertently proving the paper’s thesis.

Which just goes to show: you never were as special as everyone always said you were.

“Why efforts to reject the mainstream merely result in a new conformity.” – MIT Tech Review

Related imageAs are my tats and piercings

Sunday, March 10, 2019

A Week in the Newsroom

What a strange news week.

Obama's chickens coming home to roost   Good night Chet. Goodnight David.

1. The Democrats in the House voted against a resolution to excluding illegal aliens from voting to U.S. elections

2.  The Democrats in the House voted as a block to lower the voting age for all federal elections from 18 to 16

3. The Democrats in the House refused to vote on a resolution condemning anti-Semitism in general and Ilhan Omar’s anti-Semitism in particular. Choosing instead to condemn all bigotry.

4. Jussie Smollett was indicted on 16 felony charges

5. Major blackout (trigger!) in the socialist paradise of Venezuela

Journalists report via cellphones – wait till they run out of juice!

6. Anti-Semite and hater Ilhan Omar tries to BLAME the reporter who quoted her saying Obama got 'away with murder' on drone strikes for 'distorting' her words, then releases audio of her interview that proves the journalist was right

7. Bruce Ohr reveals that he collaborated with British spy and Fusion GPS contractor Christopher Steele while he was writing the Steele Dossier

8. High School girls in Arizona were kicked off campus for wearing ‘Make America Great Again’ attire on Spirit Day. When did it become offensive in America to support our President?

All of the above was either ignored entirely or mentioned in passing on all MSM outlets. What did they incessantly report of instead?

  • President Trump signs Bibles – Bibles! Oh the sacrilege! (as if anyone in their newsrooms knows sacrilege from Adam)

Tim plays along with the joke, changing his Twitter handle to “Tim Apple”

I think we should get the entire old band back together for a performance at next year’s SXSW festival:

Tim Apple
Jeff Amazon
Elon Tesla
Mark Facebook
Jack Twitter
Sundar Google

and really give the Cherokee Nation’s presidential hopeful something to breakup.

  • Coverage of AOC holding court at the South By Southwest Festival in Austin, where she performed her act as the smartest woman in the room, revealing herself, again, to be the Millennial Moron.

AOC with old white global warming guy Bill Nye

    "So you think about this image of welfare queens and what [Reagan] was really trying to talk about was ... this like really resentful vision of essentially black women who were doing nothing, that were 'sucks' on our country."

    "And it's this whole tragedy of the commons type of thinking where it's like because ... this one specific group of people, that you are already kind of subconsciously primed to resent, you give them a different reason that's not explicit racism but still rooted in a racist caricature." — U.S. Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, D-N.Y.

    If I weren’t so tired it would all be enough to make me weep for America. Perhaps that will come after I’ve had another cup of covfefe and begin to process this “daylight saving time” thing.