Saturday, September 24, 2016

The Village Idiot; Fundamentally Transformed

Guess who changed their mind and is now going to vote for Trump?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know: Ted Cruz. Butt this is even BIGGER! I don’t normally cover the Village Idiot butt this - this is YUGE! Kimmie Kardashian might switch her allegiance from Hillary and go with Trump!!!! 

kim-kardashian-hillary-clinton-selfie

And wait till you hear why - Caitlyn! That’s right Caitlyn Jenner set her straight, how ironic is that?

caitlyn-jenner-settles-with-prius-driver__oPt

Can Kanye be far behind?

150806235204-hillary-clinton-kim-kardashian-kanye-selfie-exlarge-169

Or will this create irreconcilable differences in yet another Kardashian marriage? Stay tuned.

Meanwhile, apparently Ted Cruz either came to his senses and realized that his pride isn’t as important as the future of his children or he decided that he might need the RNC at some point in his future career plan so he announced he’s sort of supporting Trump.

Cruz said he made the decision because he wants to keep his word to support the Republican nominee – and he finds Hillary Clinton “wholly unacceptable.”

I think Reince Priebus may deserve a bit more respect than I’ve been willing to give in the past:

“Look, people who agreed to support the nominee, who took part in our process, they used tools from the RNC. They agreed to support the nominee. They took part in our process,” Priebus explained.

“We’re a private party. We’re not a public entity. Those people need to get on board,” he warned. “And if they’re thinking they’re going to run again someday, I think we’re going to evaluate the nomination process, and I don’t think it’s going to be that easy for them. I think these are things that our party’s going to look at in the process. I think people who gave us their word, used information from the RNC, should get on board.” - Raw Story

As you know I was a yuge Ted supporter until he hid behind his conscience in order to become the de facto leader of the #HillaryByProxy movement. And before he revealed his conscience to be more id than superego.

id ego superego

So I’m glad he decided to do the right thing even if he did have to be cattle prodded into it.

I don’t expect Jeb to join the new Republican party as everyone knows the Bushes are finally over. Nor do I expect John Kas-ick to join as he really is a little man, even if his father was a mailman. And he isn’t that smart.

Butt Cruz…welcome back buddy. Make nice with The Donald and I see no reason why you can’t be the first Supreme Court Justice to step down after 8 years and go on to win the presidency. That would be historical.

even-donald-trump-would-agree-for-ted-cruz-supreme-court-appointment

After all, as Ted said, DJT can’t Make America Great Again all by himself. So thanks for keeping your word.

cruz conservatismIt will take a village

Oh, and one last thing; has anybody thought to put Glenn Beck on suicide watch yet?

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Friday, September 23, 2016

Don’t Worry, We’ve Got a Plan

Okay, it’s official: no public appearances (including fund raisers!) until debate night.

CHAPPAQUA, N.Y., Sept. 22 (UPI) -- Democratic presidential nominee Hillary Clinton has cleared her public campaign schedule as of Thursday to focus on preparing for Monday's presidential debate, while her opponent Donald Trump will continue campaigning in swing states through Saturday, according to their campaign schedules.UPI

no drinking 2

Since Hilz, the smartest woman in the world, is already eminently qualified to be president -

hillary's accomplishments - Copy

she doesn’t need to waste time reviewing issues. Instead, her prep will include the following:

Effective techniques for stifling a yawn, lest someone claim she’s too tired to be president:

yawn5 - Copy

Effective techniques for stifling a cough, lest someone claim she’s too ill to be president:

Wolfy-Grandma-smGrandma, what a big cough you have!

How to fall over gracefully in the event of a sudden neurological incident:

bunny sleep gif2

And especially, how to smile without looking like a crazed maniac:

bo hillary maniacal laugh

I think we’re good with the first 3 butt we’re still working on that last one:

scary hillary

It looks like we have a little more work to do:

via Larwyn’s Linx

Butt don’t worry, we’ve got plenty of time to nail this; and we’ve got a plan…

laugh and sleep irish - Copy

I would recommend a very, very long sleep.

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Thursday, September 22, 2016

Everything is Progressing According to Plan*

I see that #HilzHiatus has rolled their candidate out this week to prove she’s not a hologram:

Although I noted in the Orlando appearance she avoided the usual side-to-side teleprompter reading - in order to avoid any more commentary on her wonky eye. Instead she either used notes on the podium, turned her entire head/body or spoke directly straight into the camera, which used to be standard practice before the multi-TOTUS era butt now appears odd.

The crowd in Orlando was yuge! Not Donald Trump public arena yuge, butt HRC local school gym yuge:

huge crowd at hillary orlando rally

And it was only scheduled because she was in town anyway to have her picture taken with a bunch of 1 percenters at a $100,000/head fundraiser:

Clinton was scheduled to appear at a fundraiser Wednesday night at the home of attorney John Morgan in a gated community of Heathrow. Morgan and the Clinton campaign had no comment on the event, which includes a reception for those who donate $100,000.

Meanwhile, rioting continued in Charlotte where they were protesting the police shooting of an armed black man ignoring police orders. I can’t help butt note that the last time we saw so so much mayhem in a 12 month span was during the Long Hot Summer of 1967.

Back then the Black Power Movement used Civil Rights as an excuse to release mayhem in the streets. Oddly  enough that occurred during the term of Lyndon Johnson (D) - champion of the Great Society and the Black man.

lyndon johnson

Now – in the Age of Obama- the Black Lives Matter crew, under the guise of Social Justice, is inciting riots  across the country again.  Fifty years into The Great Society and everything seems to be progressing according to plan (*H/T Lantern); the black man (and woman) is getting a little something, like flat screen TVs…and iPads.

… America is on the verge of a race war. Particularly since August 2014, from the shooting of black suspect Michael Brown by white officer Darren Wilson in Ferguson to the rise of the Black Lives Matter movement which has wedged its way into national prominence, racial unrest in this country under Obama’s reign has gone from a tense simmer to a churning boil.

The left want to pin this ugly decline on what they perceive to be the right’s racist refusal to accept a black man as President; but in fact, it is left’s own corrosive, inherently racist, identity politics, spearheaded by Obama himself, that has exacerbated rather than healed our racial divide. Frontpage

To which all I can add is Jon Gabriel’s evergreen tweet:

exjon_racial_healing_12-17-15

How much more racial healing can we endure before the entire society breaks down?

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Wednesday, September 21, 2016

James Comey’s FBI Clears the Path For Evil-Doers

Let’s review the FBI’s track record over the past 3 years:

They investigated the Boston Bombers and found no reason for concern, thereby clearing any hurdles in the path of the Tsarnaev brothers to accomplish their goal of wreaking death and havoc on the Boston Marathon.

Comey’s FBI were also investigating the “Draw Muhammad” shooters. Again, they found  nothing that a reasonable prosecutor would have pursued. Unfortunately for the shooters they were taken out by local police before being able to achieve their life-long desire of killing dozens of infidels for Muhammad- who-shall-remain-faceless.

muhammad cartoon drew first 

Omar Mateen was investigated too - twice. Finding that “no reasonable prosecutor would bring such a case,” Comey’s FBI left him to accomplish his desire of massacring dozens of gay people (Allah be praised).

Madeline-Zucker-Pied-Piper-Jihad-1024x648

And now it appears that the FBI also investigated Ahmad Khan Rahami after his own father turned him in as a terrorist. Alas, that investigation was also closed when it was found  that “no reasonable prosecutor would bring such a case.”

With a track record like that it’s not surprising that Hillary - after an extensive FBI investigation – was likewise cleared by none other than Director Comey who could not find enough evidence of wrongdoing to bring charges so concluded that “no reasonable prosecutor would bring such a case.” And thank goodness, as that leaves Hillary free to pursue her life-long dream of becoming the first US President with a vagina.

hill fbi

And speaking of Watergate…

hills watergate

Hillary was and remains the most dubiously innocent woman in America. Butt what difference at this point does it make?

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Tuesday, September 20, 2016

America’s Last Black President Addresses the UN for the Last Time

Today is the last time Barry’s motorcade and entourage will foul up Manhattan traffic all day in order to address the United Nations General Assembly. It will be the last time as President he will be able to use the UN backdrop to apologize for America, chastise those who dare disagree with him, and lie with impunity – for the greater good of course.

Was6920071

It will be Barry’s last chance to use the UN pulpit to preach that terrorism is just a “war of narratives” and explain why we need to welcome even more “refugees” to our shores. Because, after all, they are just like you and me; they come for love.

terrorist hates america

I suspect he will not take the opportunity to address the mayhem the world has descended into since he took the reins of power in the Western world. Rather, expect our last Black President to note his historic record of achievements:

His historic accord on global warming, something he had to do on his own because of the do-nothing Congress. And because he promised that “this was the moment when the rise of the oceans began to slow and our planet began to heal.”

the-epa-spilled-1-million-gallons-of-waste-water-into-a-colorado-river--turning-it-orangeEPA Colorado river spill, on it’s way to Obama’s lowering oceans

His historic Russian reset:

putin obama

His historic Iranian nuclear deal that is certain to heal US/Iranian relations:

iran captures us sailors

His historic opening of Cuba along with the resultant healing:

President Obama’s “syrupy” words about brotherhood and shared history, and his call to leave behind the enmity of the past, were enough to give Cubans “a heart attack,” former president Fidel Castro said Monday in his first public response to Obama’s visit to Cuba last week.

“We don’t need any gifts from the empire,” Castro wrote in a scathing article, addressed to “Brother Obama” and published in Granma, the Cuban Communist Party newspaper

His historic, special Chinese ties:

no red carpet for you obama

And if he has any time left after all these bows he will trash-talk the people who are trying to undo his legacy  by Making America Great Again. By using profiling. And Walls. What a basket of deplorables.

netanyahu trump

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Monday, September 19, 2016

May You Be Thrice Blessed

President Obama, at the Black Caucus Foundation Dinner Saturday night:

"I’ve been so blessed to have a wife and a partner on this journey who makes it look so easy," he said, according to the White House transcript. "And is so strong, so honest and so beautiful and so smart."

so strong,

AP_michelle_obama_flex_jef_160606_12x5_1600

so honest

peaMO’s healthy eating regimen, honestly

and so beautiful

state dinnerSo beautiful I had her framed

and so smart."

michelle-obama bring back our girlsHow’s that working out for you, sherpa of smart?

Well you know what they say – one (wo)man’s blessing is another man’s curse.

blessing curseLike couture, it all depends on how you wear it

And while Barry’s blessing sounds more like a Chinese curse to me, let me to be the first to say “may you be thrice blessed.” And I really mean it.

black caucus dinner

“The first lady donned a glittery gold gown by Khan** for the first couple's last awards dinner with the Congressional Black Caucus Saturday night in Washington, winning applause in a strapless confection that featured a full skirt, sweetheart neckline and hand-painted gold leaf on black tulle.” - USA Today

**Note: that’s Naeem Khan, not Ahmad Khan

ahmed-rahami-wanted-poster1Gentle practitioner of the Religion of Pieces

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Sunday, September 18, 2016

Hillary’s Five Phobia Hydra

I knew there was a reason  I still have a subscription to the Wall Street Journal; because when he is “on” Daniel Henninger’s Wonderland column is peerless. This week he was definitely on: Les Déplorables.

les deplorables

Hillary Clinton’s comment that half of Donald Trump’s supporters are “racist, sexist, homophobic, xenophobic, Islamophobic”—a heck of a lot of phobia for anyone to lug around all day—puts back in play what will be seen as one of the 2016 campaign’s defining forces: the revolt of the politically incorrect.

They may not live at the level of Victor Hugo’s “Les Misérables,” but it was only a matter of time before les déplorables—our own writhing mass of unheard Americans—rebelled against the intellectual elites’ ancien régime of political correctness. (snip)

Perhaps sensing that public knowledge of what she really thinks could be a political liability, Mrs. Clinton went on to describe “people who feel that the government has let them down, the economy has let them down, nobody cares about them . . . and they’re just desperate for change.”

In other words Trumpers are either deplorable bigots or chumps. And listen up Democrats: she thinks the same thing about you. That’s what all members of the intellectual elite think about the rest of us. That’s precisely why Trump has so many acolytes; he treats his supporters as smart citizens not disdainful detritus.

The progressive Democrats, a wholly public-sector party, have disconnected from the realities of the private economy, which exists as a mysterious revenue-producing abstraction.

And yes, he’s rich; rich beyond our wildest dreams. But unlike Nancy Pelosi, Harry Reid, Elizabeth Warren, Obama, Hillary, et al who have grown rich at the public trough Trump made his money the old fashioned way, he earned it – in a capitalistic system that used to reward meritocracy but increasingly rewards cronyism instead.

crony capitalism

And unlike the elitists he doesn’t pretend to be “one of us,” he embraces his wealth. But doesn’t behave as if that makes him a better American; in fact, he shares our concerns: the economy sucks and a lot of that has to do with unfair trade practices and the number of foreigners being let into the country. We’re being overrun with immigrants – legal and illegal - sapping our jobs, draining our resources and filling our prisons. And like us Trump sees this as a problem not a voter block.

Mrs. Clinton is right that they feel the system has let them down. There is a legitimate argument over exactly when the rising digital economy started transferring income away from blue-collar workers and toward the “creative class” of Google and Facebook employees, no few of whom are smug progressives who think the landmass seen from business class between San Francisco and New York is pocked with deplorable, phobic Americans.

Also known as “Flyover” – a foreign land where elitist politicians feel uncomfortable and visit only once every 4 years to tell us how much they feel our pain.

us_redblue-vichyFlyover America

Donald Trump’s appeal, in part, is that he cracks back at progressive cultural condescension in utterly crude terms. Nativists exist, and the sky is still blue. But the overwhelming majority of these people aren’t phobic about a modernizing America. They’re fed up with the relentless, moral superciliousness of Hillary, the Obamas, progressive pundits and 19-year-old campus activists. 

snowflakes for tyrannyRead the Constitution, snowflakes

Her supporters say it’s Donald Trump’s rhetoric that is “divisive.” Just so. But it’s rich to hear them claim that their words and politics are “inclusive.” So is the town dump. They have chopped American society into so many offendable identities that only a Yale freshman can name them all.

450x298-alg_trash_obamaTime to take the trash out

If the Democrats lose behind Hillary Clinton, it will be in part because America’s les déplorables decided enough of this is enough . 

Or possibly it’s because most of us aren’t actually as stupid as the big headed elitists think we are.

 

This post was NOT sponsored by the “stupidity of the American voter, or whatever” Party

Other Health Care MandatesJonathan Gruber

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