With all the big news around Washington this week I really fell down on the job. I completely forgot to report on the lovely little Congressional picnic we held the night before the BFD.
And boy, do I feel the fool! After all these many years of refracting, reflecting and deflecting Lady M in every conceivable light, it just now occurred to me: the purpose of the boob belt! Like so many things, with hindsight it’s completely obvious – lift and separate! In order to showcase your assets, I guess.
It’s sort of like a metaphor for Big Guy’s historical presidency too; lift the restraints imposed by the Constitution and separate – by “class,” race, sexual preference, and intellect. Score-O! Although I don’t know how that showcases our assets any more than Lady M’s boob belt, butt I’m still working on it.
Of course, full-figured gals have been “lifting and separating” their assets for decades with Playtex;
Butt when most of your assets have been transferred to uh… shall we say a “satellite” location the “boob belt” may provide more utility than a traditional over the shoulder boulder holder, if you know what I mean.
Of course, as we’ve discussed so often before, sometimes these things seem like a much better idea on the design board -
than in final execution:
Kind of like with Obamacare.
Anyway, for Lady M the biggest problem with the proper application and utilization of the boob belt seems to be with the “lift” part;
what we keep ending up with is not so much “lift” as “divide” and separate. That concept might work pretty well in politics:
Nancy and 100 members of the Black Caucus refuse to participate in racist vote:
Butt “divide and separate” in couture? May not always be a successful strategy.
Sorry! Where did these pictures come from!?!
Anyway, enough fashion commentary. As you know our nation is under fire.
I mean in Colorado. Big Guy went to tour the damaged area yesterday, and tweeted about it:
What? No, wait -that’s the wrong one! Here you go:
Uh, no, that’s not it either. I can’t seem to find Big Guy’s tweets about the wild fires destroying Colorado. Butt here are some pictures of the devastation.
Mirror Lake Court, Colorado, before and after fire destroyed it (more here)
According to the press pool though, Big Guy was there
for a photo op surveying the damage.
So everything should be okay now.
You are now free to go about your business. BO is on the case.