Saturday, November 3, 2012

Party like it’s 1979. Or maybe 1980.

History: strange how it repeats itself.

As thousands of Iranians gathered in Tehran yesterday to celebrate the 33rd anniversary of the siege of the US embassy by burning American flags and chanting “Death to America,” Big Guy’s R-word opponent would have you believe that this election hinges on a single question: “Are you better off now than you were 4 years ago?”

ua iran crisis 79egyptembassy

Tehran, Iran 1979; Cairo, Egypt, 2012

On November 4, 1979, Islamist students calling themselves “Muslim Student Followers of the Imam’s Line” invaded the grounds of the US embassy and seized its staff.  Fifty-two US diplomats were held hostage for 444 days.

After failed negotiation attempts, US President Jimmy Carter ordered a rescue mission, which tragically ended in the deaths of eight American servicemen and one Iranian civilian.

 

That’s silly. With all of history at our disposal, the real operative question here isn’t “are you better off than four years ago,” butt “are you better off now than you were thirty-four years ago?” You know, when Jimmy Carter was our president.

see other similarities here

I have to say, some of the images coming across the wire yesterday were oddly reminiscent of those good old Carter years:

 

1979-gas-lines_thumb1  Gas lines, 1979 (is that an empty chair by the pump!?!)

2012-gas-lines-sandy-1031-horizontal[2]Gas lines yesterday (what’s with all the empty chairs!?)

Well, as I said, history does have a way of repeating itself.

prezzys fair sho-datedt

As you may recall - if you were alive back then – gas lines formed in 1979 for the second time that decade when Iran seized our embassy and took 52 Americans hostage for 444 days.

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fax: (701) 947-5933Yes; Jimmy Carter (along with Tony Orlando) is also responsible for today’s plethora of colored ribbons.

If you weren’t alive back in the late 70’s when Jimmy Carter badly mangled America’s foreign policy, completely mismanaged domestic energy policy, the national deficit and domestic economy I suppose you can be forgiven for not noticing that Big Guy is standing under history’s exact same arch.

Arch of the Hurva (Ruined Synagogue) in the Old City. JerusalemArch of the Hurva Synagogue in the Jewish Quarter of Old Jerusalem: twice destroyed by Muslims

 

carter obamaWhat would a Nobel Peace Prize winner do about Israel, I wonder?

And if you were not yet born in 1979, then you probably won’t understand how these current images of odd-even gas rationing cause flashbacks to another crucial election in America’s history; one in which many people were excited about voting for a guy who still thought of American exceptionalism as a shining city on a hill rather than a rusty bucket to kick down the road to perdition.

empty chair rusty bucketRusty pail, meet empty chair

So maybe you don’t recognize the similarity between the election of 1980 and 2012. And you probably don’t recognize any similarity between this man, Romney, who is running for president, and the great Renaldus Magnus.

            reaganmitt bo ok lyin' is ok now

Butt I tell you, there are similarities. For example, Ronnie, too, was a man who thought of America as a place where people vote for “love of country” not for “revenge.” Men such as these view this country more as beacon of hope than a country that “at times has shown arrogance and been dismissive, even derisive.”

So as we watch the long lines waiting for gas we can’t help butt notice that most of the cars back in 1979 were American made, vans haven’t changed much in 30 years and gas was around 89 cents a gallon - only a buck less than when Big Guy took office! Of course now you can afford to pay a little more and you have an iPhone to entertain yourself with while waiting on line - at least until the battery dies. So I leave it to you to decide if you’re better off now or not.

gas lines 79-12Please shut off your engines: “idolization” no longer allowed.

So as news of the magnitude of the devastation of Sandy continues to roll in, as the plight of people whose homes have been destroyed and have no where to go, no food to eat, and no fuel for their cars let us remember that we are all just one catastrophe removed from ruination. Just one serious disaster away from a complete breakdown of social order.

Allow me to frame that in the immortal words of Ronald Reagan:

Freedom is never more than one generation away from extinction. We didn’t pass it on to our children in the bloodstream. It must be fought for, protected, and handed on for them to do the same, or one day we will spend our sunset years telling our children and our children's children what it was once like in the United States where men were free.

So, children…for the sake of the children, vote this time with your head, not your lady parts or “little head.” Your future, and your children’s children's futures, are not likely to be ruined by global warming and lack of contraceptives butt rather something much more treacherous.

John-Adams-Poster-Moral-People

So please, stay calm and carry on; butt party like it’s 1980.

1000px-ElectoralCollege1980_svg

Electoral Map 1980

Linked By: BadBlue, and Key West reader on HotAir, and Marilynn and AnnieLaurie and MRM on twitter, and BlogsLucianneLoves, and NOBO2012 on Free Republic, Thanks!

Friday, November 2, 2012

No Jam Today, It’ll Be a One Term Proposition

Some time last week the Big Brains decided to change the period to an exclamation point in our ironic iconic campaign motto. And I must say, Lady M wears it well:   

mo bpgreen forward

So let’s have a little discussion about the proper use of punctuation marks:   

Use an exclamation point [ ! ] at the end of an emphatic declaration,

interjection, or command.
"No!" he yelled. "You do not have authorization! Stand down! Or you will be relieved of your command!"

An exclamation mark may be used to close questions that are meant to convey extreme emotion, as in

“Where’s our backup!”

Use a period [ . ] at the end of a command.

  • Everyone in the administration was commanded to blame the video for the attack on our Embassy.

Use a question mark [ ? ] at the end of a direct question.

  • Why on earth was aid denied to our Ambassador and his men while they were being attacked by al Qaeda terrorists?

Of course, some sentences really require the use of an interobang, the combination of an exclamation point and a question mark, as in

  • “Where is the f***ing Spectre!?!”

There were some who argued that a question mark might have been the more correct punctuation mark to add to the FORWARD? slogan under the circumstances. Butt since this is a campaign, not a grammar seminar, we went with the mark that more correctly conveys the message we are trying to advance.

Some people favored the interobang butt it was rejected as it appeared too equivocal,

16914-forward-interrobang

ditto the concise butt still confusing contraction of the word:

17035-fword!

So we just settled for the NEW! IMPROVED! BIGGER THAN EVER! version:

forward4 HOPE and punctuation CHANGE!

And now, back to the real issue: the final four on the campaign trail with MO and BO; Here’s Lady M rockin’ her frock and energizin’ the base. Note that both of them are defying the rules of daylight savings time and springing FORWARD! into the fall, instead of following conventional wisdom and falling behind. Talk about staying on message!

       mo hereshecomesbo mincing it

Fall FOREWARD!

Given the circumstances, I think this grammar change was sheer genius. To paraphrase Lewis Carroll, “If you don’t know where you’re going, any road will take you FOREWARD!”

recycled hope and changeAnd if you reach a fork in the road, take it.

We’re just hoping to maintain enough FORWARD! activity to maneuver around Benghazigate for just FOUR more days. And so far it’s looking good - that one rogue Wapo guy is quickly falling back in with the SNN (Selective News Networks) pack of lapdogs. So our wrap-it-up strategy is to stay below the radar, riding the tailwinds of the Storm Of The Century So Far (SOTCSF) to victory.

I’m sure everyone will understand why we won’t have time to hold a press conference to answer questions about the Benghazi cover-up attack before Tuesday. With all this frenetic activity around Historic Hurricane Sandy and the most historic reelection campaign ever, we really can’t squeeze it in.

So let’s all just stay focused on the important stuff for these last few days okay? Big Bird, binders, bayonets, condoms, contraceptives and choice. If need be, we’re prepared to move on to the letter “D” as well.

Oh, and don’t forget that Big Guy whacked Osama and delivered us from terror! And that’s why the Benghazi attack was not initially thought to be a terrorist attack. Butt as you know, there will always be a few bumps in the road. You’ve got to break a few of Big Bird’s eggs and all that.

big bird

As long as we’re able to keep the SNN off the trail of these niggling little facts (No, that’s not racist; look it up in your Funk and Wagnall's) as laid out by Doug Ross’s twin timeline d’affaire d'├ętat we should be just fine.

121101-benghazi-timeline2H/T Clarice

A quick read appears to reveal that nobody knew nothin’ about anything. Thank goodness we only have four more days to keep the wraps on this because it sure looks like we’re getting ourselves knee deep in the hoopla. Or is that “hookah?”

alices hookah"Curiouser and curiouser!" Cried Alice (she was so much surprised, that for the moment she quite forgot how to speak good English).   Lewis Carroll

 

Butt Alice’s concern with proper grammar brings me back to Big Guy’s updated campaign slogan: FORWARD!  It’s really brilliant when you think about it: a concise way of stating the Red Queen’s rule of law:

‘The rule is, jam to-morrow and jam yesterday—but never jam to-day.’

That’s a campaign promise that we’re sure we can keep.

jam

‘It must come sometimes to “jam to-day”,’ Alice objected. ‘No, it can't,’ said the Queen.

Why, you ask?

socialism

Because sooner or later you run out of other people’s money.

Margaret Thatcher“It’s not as if I didn’t tell the Queen as much.”

So, as you prepare to vote next Tuesday just ask yourself one little question: “Do I have as much jam as I did FORE years ago?

jam3Why is it always jam tomorrow with this guy? And when are we going to get a little peanut butter to go with it?

Linked By: AnnieLaurie on twitter, and, Colleen Hunt on facebook NOBO2012 on Free Republic, Thanks!

Thursday, November 1, 2012

Honey, we don’t just think you’re stupid. We’re counting on it.

Halloween was cancelled this year. Nobody was surprised around here other then Chef, who was still busily preparing pumpkin treats yesterday afternoon.

111124-pumpkinWhat do you mean we’ve cancelled Halloween!?! I’ve been working my butt off!

Alas, due to Lady M’s heavy campaign schedule along with the lingering effects of Frankenstorm, Super Sandy (who has already proven herself very, very useful to our reelection efforts), our tradition of handing out treats at the Big White was suspended in order to address more pressing concerns, such as making sure we get the vote out.

Halloween_MoveOn

Butt let’s face it, Halloween has been a bit of a let down ever since our first big historic Halloween party back in ‘09.

fairyHalloween 2009: the first sighting of our famous eunuch butterflies in a bubble

And of course that was also the year of our infamous private after-party party with Johnny Depp and the rest of the cast from Alice in Wonderland:

johnny-depp-Alice-in-the-White-House-halloween-2010-johnny-depp-17993446-685-556

Which, in one of those ironic twists of life imitating art, established the tone around here for the next 3 years.

mad_hatter_watermarkedalice,alice,in,wonderland,quote,quotes-c19e052a3abaf4e4d2468dc19f3de390_h

As a brief refresher, here were some of the Halloween highlights that year:

capt_1676dffd111d49ecba55c60df4632439_obama_halloween_whmc101skeletons in the closet

illegal aliensillegal aliens at the door

halloween-reidCreepy characters operating under cover of night

hillary in halloween modeThe Great Pumpkin herself

sally linus

“Sally Brown: I was robbed! I spent the whole night waiting for the Great Pumpkin, when I could have been out for tricks or treats. Halloween is over, and I missed it! You blockhead. You kept me up all night waiting for the Great Pumpkin, and all that came was a beagle. I didn’t get a chance to go out for tricks or treats. And it was all your fault. I’ll sue! What a fool I was! I could have had candy apples and gum and cookies and money and all sorts of things, but no, I had to listen to you. You blockhead. What a fool I was. Trick or treats come only once a year. And I missed it by sitting in a pumpkin patch with a blockhead. YOU OWE ME RESTITUTION!”

waxman-moron500x422  Moonbats galore:

Butt now we have a new problem raising it’s ugly little head - somebody didn’t get the memo sent out to our SNN (Selective News Networks). As David Ignatius opined in his editorial  “Lingering Questions About Benghazi” yesterday:

So what did happen in Benghazi the night of Sept. 11 when Woods, Ambassador Christopher Stevens and two others were killed? The best way to establish the facts would be a detailed, unclassified timeline of events; officials say it may be released this week. That’s a must, even in the volatile final week of the campaign.

What do we need to do to make this story go away? If a hurricane of monstrous proportions caused by Republican-condoned man made global warming won’t wash this affaire d'├ętat away, what will? It’s as if the Fox News journalists adopted the code “Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed rounds,” now that that the Post Office has no use for it.

Lingering questions about Benghazi? Are you kidding? Why would David say that?

Summarizing an Aug. 15 emergency meeting convened by the U.S. Mission in Benghazi, the Aug. 16 cable marked “SECRET” said that the State Department’s senior security officer, also known as the RSO, did not believe the consulate could be protected.

“RSO (Regional Security Officer) expressed concerns with the ability to defend Post in the event of a coordinated attack due to limited manpower, security measures, weapons capabilities, host nation support, and the overall size of the compound,” the cable said.

Well okay, maybe that does raise a question or two, butt as David himself points out:

A final, obvious point: The “fog of battle” that night was dense not just in Benghazi but also in Cairo, Tunis and elsewhere. As one official concedes, “The reports were all over the map that night, and there was a lot of confusion.” America needed better intelligence. That’s the toughest problem to address, but the most important.

The only real question remaining is how many people will agree next Tuesday that America needs better intelligence?

bo phone wrong number faceWhy vote for CHANGE when you’ve already got the most intelligent man ever elected as  President of the US in the Oval Office?

Unless of course you don’t trust him. Not that there’s any reason not to.

While the administration’s public statements have suggested that the attack came without warning, the Aug. 16 cable seems to undercut those claims. It was a direct warning to the State Department that the Benghazi consulate was vulnerable to attack, that it could not be defended and that the presence of anti-U.S. militias and Al Qaeda was well-known to the U.S. intelligence community.

(snip)

 

Beck just won’t let sleeping dogs lie either.              (h/t: Citizen Director)

 

"An independent board is conducting a thorough review of the assault on our post in Benghazi," Deputy Spokesman Mark Toner said in written statement. "Once we have the board's comprehensive account of what happened, findings and recommendations, we can fully address these matters."

CharlieBrownFootball2“I don’t mind your dishonesty half as much as I mind your opinion of me.You must think I’m stupid.” Charlie Brown. It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown. Charles M Schulz. 1966.

Honey, we don’t just think you’re stupid, we’re counting on it.

Linked By: Larwyn’s Linx on Doug Ross@Journal, and BlogsLucianneLoves, and NOBO2012 on Free Republic, and Mireille Buser on facebook, and Annie Laurie on twitter, Thanks!

Getting Any Disqus Moniker You Wish

Hello deehra/Della Street, Maklin/sportinlife10, MOLs, MODs, MYLs, MYDs and FOMs os nay moniker, it is me Raj:

MOTUS has asked me to explain how you can all regain your old monikers in her new, and often frustrating Disqus comment system. In this mini-tutorial I, Raj, will demonstrate how “deehra” can again become “Della Street”, “Maklin” can become “sportinlife10” and anyone can become anyone in the rapid blink of your optical sensor.

Disqus can be pesky and does assign you a unique “username” when you create an account. This must be unique and it will be your “moniker< by default. However, a little nerd magic can change your “moniker” to anything you wish. It is very simple to accomplish and here’s how:

1- Login with your “Username” and Password” then hover your cursor over the Disqus box on thr right side of the comment popup:

1

2- Now select “”Edit Profile”:

2

3- Now select the “Profile” tab and enter the “moniker” you wish to be known by in the “Full Name” box. My “moniker”, is Raj and it is displayed with my posts.

Screenshot Studio capture #598

4- As you can see, on your “Account” tab, your unique “Username” remains the same and you must continue to use it to log into your Disqus account. My moniker, “Raj,” was not available as a “Username” for my account, so I have RajRajaroni as my “Username” for login.

Screenshot Studio capture #597

You can change your “moniker” to anything you want, as often as you wish, simply by changing the name entered into your “Full Name” box. Heck, you could even be Lady M or Big Guy, although you would very soon see black Suburbans in your driveway and helicopters overhead.a security clearances beyond those of mortal men, Little Mo has volunteered to assist by showing you some of the “monikers” he has employed in his assignments:

lmo1

As you can see, his “Username”(disqus_d6zUOkwocy) is obviously issued by Langley, and would not be recognized by anyone without a NOC list. But his “Full Name” moniker is Little Mo. This time…Surprised smile

lmo2

Here, Little Mo became someone else:

lmo3

And finally, I can not confirm nor deny that this identity has been used:

lmo4

As you can see, “monikering” can be fun and profitable, but please take care not to use  monikers that will summon Big Guy’s “SS” Stormtroopers.

Just remember, you will still have to login with the unique “Username” or “Email” and “Password” associated with your Disqus account, NOT your “Full Name” moniker, but the name displayed on your poste will be the “Full Name” entered on your “Profile” tab.

If you have any difficulty with regaining your “moniker,” please do not engage in hesitation and email me, Raj, at raj.rajaroni@gmail.com for prompt, reliable technical support.

Wednesday, October 31, 2012

No One Left Behind...In A Swing State

Thank goodness Sandy came along. None of our other approaches seem to be working anymore so we really needed a new shiny thing.

lower manhattan lights outOr not so shiny, as the case may be. We work pretty well in the dark too.

Plus this new crisis allows BO to do a little “presidencing” – something he hasn’t been doing much of lately. In case you’re wondering, “presidencing” involves stringing together  authoritative declarative sentences (with or without TOTUS) such as:

"My instructions to the federal agents has been, 'Do not figure out why we can't do something. I want you to figure out how we do something,'"

Which sounds much more presidential than any of BO’s recent raft of campaign ads that some people consider juvenile, tasteless and low rent. Butt in their defense, they’re aimed at specific constituencies within our ranks that, well, many people consider juvenile, tasteless and low rent.

In case you missed some of these ads because you don’t subscribe to Moveon.org or get Ms.NBC on your cable channels, here’s a brief recap. 

First, an ad pitched to the “For The Children” crowd (i.e. Clinton soccer moms and teachers of propaganda) there’s the Children-For-Obama production (not to be confused with the original Praise Obama children -  I’m sure you remember them - mmm, mmm, mmm!):

for the children obamaInnocent little pawns for Obama

In which children of the future sing of Republican perdition: dirty air, dirty water, pushing granny off the cliff, dead polar bears and “fixed” gays – whatever that is. The ad scores high on the “cuteness,” “mendacity,” “exploitative” and “propaganda” scales;  low on the decency, tolerance and truth scales.

Next there was the foul-mouthed senior citizens ad aimed at, well, I’m not sure exactly which constituency we were going for here, low information voters perhaps?

nursing home foul mouthed

It features a group of senior citizens with anger management issues discussing what violence they would like to unleash if Governor Romney wins all in NSFW dialogue. I’d recommend upping their meds. I think they’re still covered by Obamacare.

Then “for the women” there was this “first timers” for Obama spot, featuring the country’s second most questionable virgin (Madonna has a stranglehold claim on that title in perpetuity). Rather than watching the creepy original again, I’ll just let Greg Gutfeld explain how this political hot potato was perceived:

So, after receiving less than spectacular reviews in the presidential polls for these attempts at audience segmentation, the Big Brains were relieved to have a spectacular storm to divert everyone’s eyes away from them and other man-made disasters.

benghazi_cloud_white_house_10-28-12-2

So Big Guy moved quickly to address the situation from Red Cross Headquarters; imploring people everywhere to “lean forward:” 

"I want you to cut through red tape, I want you to cut through bureaucracy; there's no excuse for inaction at this point. I want every agency to lean forward and to make sure we are getting the resources where they're needed as quickly as possible."

“Lean Forward?” There’s an original idea. I wonder who writes this stuff?

MSNBC-TWITTER-ICONserious journalism at msnbc

Oh right, the Ms.NBC “talent”

So while the SNN (Selective News Networks) wolf pack hunts down Romney for an answer to their critical question regarding his plans for eliminating the middle man in the disaster aid process, FEMA:

"Governor, are you going to eliminate FEMA?"

"Governor, you've been asked 14 times, why are you refusing to answer the question?"

Not one member of the SNN beta pack

dogs bowing

dares ask BO why he is determined to make sure that no one is left behind in the aftermath of Sandy:

“This is a tough time for a lot of people; millions of folks all across the Eastern Seaboard, but America's tougher. And we're tougher because we pull together, we leave nobody behind, we make sure we respond as a nation and remind ourselves that whenever an American is in need, all of stand together to make sure we're providing the help that's necessary.”

- butt left our men behind in Benghazi (via Larwyn’s Linx)

SOS-bo denied

Because that would just be rude; especially while Big Guy is so busy “presidencing” for the cameras American people.

bo presidencingI’m Barack Obama, and I approve this ad.

IN CASE YOU MISSED THE EARLIER POST: PLEASE REMEMBER THE FAMILY OF BARBARA CURTIS IN YOUR PRAYERS.

Linked By: Larwyn’s Linx on Doug Ross@Journal, and Annie Laurie on twitter, and Mireille Buser on facebook, Thanks!