Filtering the Internet so you don’t have to: 2016 is SO 1984 all over again.

I see that Google Chrome is introducing a Trump filter which allows you to enjoy a Trump-free internet. I’m not sure what the price-point is for this feature butt I’m sure it will be worth it to people who won’t be voting for The Donald anyway and just don’t want to be bothered.

I believe this “feature” is known as a “trial run” in government circles.

Butt if they want to sell more of these “featured filters” they should so have a conversation with some of their other stakeholders.

For example, if they could come up with some filters that would guard against people who regularly break the internet they might have something worth calling a presser to announce. I understand why an Obama-free filter for the duration of the occupation would prove to be problematic – just try to walk that back after it slipped out; that would so be a micro-aggression.

Butt there are a few other filters that I think could be a commercial success; for example, what would you be willing to pay for a Kardashian filter?

Especially if there was an optional enhanced version that included filters of anyone associated with the K’s either by marriage, divorce or political affiliation. I think with that secret sauce thrown on it would sail right past the PC gatekeepers.

And if we could get a filter that would zap all the man-spreading going around the intertoobs I’d sure sign on, wouldn’t you?

Man-spreading, Obama style

I mean, it’s not so much the space as it is the physicality:

Whew! That Caitlyn person is sure giving me life!

Anyway, speaking of filters and bans, I see Michigan’s Upper Penninsula Lake Superior State University has released it’s annual 2016 banned words list. So, try not to use them any more, ok? Here they are:

so, conversation, price point, problematic, stakeholder, secret sauce, break the internet, walk it back, presser, man-spreading, vape, giving me life, physicality.

I skipped “vape” because there seems to be some controversy: while Lake Superior State banned it, the Oxford dictionary just named it “word of the year” so you’re on your own with this one.

All you need is a pen and an e-cig

HAPPY NEW YEAR’S EVE EVERYONE! HAVE A GOOD TIME, BUTT LET’S BE CAREFUL OUT THERE.

Linked By: Larwyn’s Linx on Doug Ross@Journal, and BlogsLucianneLoves, and Free Republic, Thanks!

Cross-Posted on Patriot Action Network

Hoverboard: The New Weapon of Mass Destruction

Did you get a Hooverboard for Christmas? Me neither. Butt they sure look like fun! And if you don’t believe me, ask Santa – hint: don’t run into immoveable objects.

Or Darth Vader – can you not take a hint?

Or even Mike Tyson – hint: stay on the hard surfaces.

“Everybody’s got a plan...”

So here’s your chance: who would you like to see crowned as this year’s hoverboard fail champion? My first choice is obvious: fit, trim, athletically gifted and blessed with enough “packaging” to prevent severe injury in the event of an unplanned landing.

My first runner-up pick gets tougher though because in the event Lady M is unable to fulfill her responsibilites as Hoverboard queen, the runner up will assume the title. So given that I think I’ll go with the other Michael, although he got his hoverboard with the optional big boy tires, handles and seat. Butt due to mandatory handicapped accomodations, he still qualifies.

Or maybe you want to take a hoverboard for a spin yourself. If so, better do it quickly because not only have they been known to spontaneously combust,

butt they are also being deployed as weapons of mass destruction in certain parts of the world. Once Homeland Security catches on to their nefarious uses, they’ll be banned.

Achmed does a test run on his suicide hoverboard.

Linked By: Larwyn’s Linx on Doug Ross@Journal, and BlogsLucianneLoves, and Free Republic, Thanks!

Cross-Posted on Patriot Action Network

Little Man, Big Head

In case there’s anyone who still thinks Rahm willingly left Big Guy’s employ as Chief of Staff to spend more time with his Chicago family: Al Sharpton, Barry’s go-to-man on race just called for Emanuel’s resignation. That should clarify the break up once and for all.

I love you bro, butt it’s time to go.

Yes, it’s true; the one time street agitator who was single handedly responsible for destroying the reputation of an innocent NY prosecuter by falsely accusing him of raping Tawana Brawley,

of instigating a riot against white owned Freddie’s Fashion Mart, resulting in the death of 8 people,

who stoked black rage after a Hasidic Jewish driver accidentally killed a young boy with his car and at the funeral railed against “Jewish diamond merchants” who “run down young boys” 

–   is now the country’s most important black leader.

So it was only a matter of time before Big Al and Big Guy would form a mutually beneficial admiration society to fundamentally transform America.

“He’s calculating ... he gets the game.” Sharpton recently told an associate when asked about why he’s bonded with Obama. – Politico

Naturally The Rev would be the designated hitter to take Rahm out of the game and get Big Guy’s hometown back in the fold before the next election. And so he was dispatched to  "Morning Joe"  to opine that “I've never seen this kind of detachment in the years I've been fighting…”

Really, Al? 

So let’s just say that the former street agitator - the little man with a big head whose power reflects an inverse relationship to his abilities – will continue to rule the roost for at least another year.

Little man, big head; your choice

P.S. Many thanks to Doug Ross – we’re all winners on this bus!

Linked By: Larwyn’s Linx on Doug Ross@Journal, and BlogsLucianneLoves, and Free Republic, Thanks!

Cross-Posted on Patriot Action Network

And The Winner Is...Us!

That’s right, we won!  Michelle’s Mirror wins Doug Ross’ Fabulous 50 Blog Award for 2015:

BEST FIRST LADY BLOG: Michelle's Mirror: nothing butt the naked truth behind FLOTUS with the best comments section east of the Mississippi

“best comment section east of the Mississippi.”

“These awards recognize a variety of blogs and websites operating in the conservative hemisphere of the Internet, all of which have worked tirelessly to promote conservatism, free market capitalism, fiscal sanity, the sovereignty of the individual, and otherwise protect America from the cockroach-like Statists -- some in very unique ways.”

I know every MOTI has already been to Larwyn’s Linx and Doug Ross @ Journal this morning, so you know that all your favorite blogs and websites are winners. Butt go back again and visit every winner’s site. Bookmark them all in your handy Freedom Fighters folder.

So MOTI, MOLs, MODs. MYLs, MYDs and FOMs, bask in the glory of this award today, you earned it. Tomorrow we start again, because we’ve got a long, hard slog ahead of us in 2016.

“Colored” Guns Are Racist

It’s not lost on anyone that the biggest supporters of gun control are those who have other people with guns employed to protect them. – Bearing Arms 

Well, it may be lost on “those who have other people with guns employed to protect them.”

Take Virginia’s radically anti-gun governor Terry McAuliff for example; his Attorney General recently moved to rescind reciprocal concealed carry permits with 25 states. In retaliation, the GOP legislature is now threatening to pass a bill that would  remove the  Governor’s armed protection unit.

Seems fair, and aren’t we all about being fair? Leveling the playing field? It might be time to remind these elected second-amendment-right-grabbers that they’re elected to serve the public, not to be our Royal Masters. 

So let’s play a little game:

Question: how many armed SS agents do you think accompanied Big Guy and the fam on their annunal shave-ice outing to Island Snow?

(side note: following the Cruz family brouhaha, no pictures of the Wee Wons accompaning daddy to Island Snow were released by any of the major news outlets. Butt I’ve got one:)

Returning again to Island Snow, near the home where the first family is vacationing in Hawaii, Obama ordered a cone with melon, cherry and lime syrups. –Yahoo

Answer: 4 visible and 10 concealed behind the pineapples.

Why? Because without guns no matter how many guards you have…

They’ll all fall down.

And for the record, Barry rejected the special flavor Island Snow made for him:

He passed over a flavor the dessert shop had created especially for him: Snowbama.

The Snowbama cone is rainbow colored, signifying the strides for gay and lesbian rights made under the Obama presidency. – Yahoo

And he didn’t accept this special rainbow colored gun specially made for him by Crayola either.

Definitely a homophobic gun, probably racist as well

Although the AR-15 remains the most racist gun of all:

Linked By: Larwyn’s Linx on Doug Ross@Journal, and BlogsLucianneLoves, and Free Republic, Thanks!

Cross-Posted on Patriot Action Network

More Dim Sum

Yesterday marked the first day of Kwanzaa and - never one to miss a non-Western holiday - Big Guy weighed in:

President Obama extended his "warmest wishes" to families across the U.S. celebrating Kwanzaa, a holiday which honors African-American culture. – Washington Post

A culture, I would point out, that non-African Americans are not welcome to celebrate because that would be cultural appropriation which is somehow offensive. Odd, as Kwanzaa itself is a cultural appropriation of 3 other holiday traditions: Thanksgiving, Christmas and Hannukah.

So African Americans are welcome to celebrate Thanksgiving, Christmas and Hannukah if they wish. Butt non-African Americans celebrating Kwanzaa would be a micro-aggression - a violation of a societally sanctioned safe space. It’s complicated; perhaps this will help:

To appropriate symbols from cultures that are not one's own is apparently now disrespectful, insensitive and offensive.

At Oberlin College in Ohio, it is food that is problematic. The student dining hall is accused of modifying "traditional" Asian recipes "without respect". The "undercooked rice and lack of fresh fish" offered in sushi "is disrespectful". The Banh Mi sandwich, served on ciabatta rather than a baguette, is "uninformed", a "gross manipulation" of this "traditional" Vietnamese dish. And the General Tso's chicken dish is prepared with steamed chicken, rather than fried chicken - another disrespectful appropriation.

 

While that sounds like satire allow me to disabuse you of that notion: these SJW are deadly earnest. Ignorant and ill-informed perhaps, butt earnest:

Because each of those named foods are themselves the result, not the victims, of cultural appropriation.

Sushi has an ancient history in Japan but what many people in Japan and the West now see as good sushi - with its rich slices of tuna and salmon - is the result of Japanese chefs adapting their traditional dish to the tastes of American GIs during post-war occupation.

The Banh Mi is a fusion dish of French baguette - brought to Vietnam through French colonialism in the nineteenth century - and Vietnamese flavours.

And General Tso's chicken? It dates back, at the earliest, to the 1950s, has nothing to do with the nineteenth century general Tso Tsung-t'ang, and only became famous when it was first served in a New York Chinese restaurant.

Dishes now guilty of “cultural appropriation” would have once been tauted as successful examples of America’s melting pot approach to assimilation; another notion that you need to be disabused of.

The end of assimilation and the beginning of our cultural experiment in “mosaics”

Butt hey, assimilation is so 20th century. As the 21st century emerges we look to become more of a mosaic of separate butt equal parts. All migrants, immigrants, refugees and anyone else who manages to somehow make it to America’s shore are not only entitled to stay, they are entitled to their safe places. And as a member of the privileged tax paying class you are entitiled to maintain those safe places and ensure they are stocked with food, clothing and prayer rugs and provided with housing, education and medical care that meets their cultural requirements.

Oh yeah, and they also want separate water fountains. 

For their feet. Somehow this all feels terribly, uh…Progressive.

Even I am amazed at how frequently this culturally appropriated graphic “sums” up the situation.

Linked By: Larwyn’s Linx on Doug Ross@Journal, and BlogsLucianneLoves, and Free Republic, Thanks!

Cross-Posted on Patriot Action Network

Boxing Day: Everybody’s Got a Plan

So here we are, the day after Christmas, also known as boxing day in Canada and Britain. Originally Boxing Day was designated to give your servants a small token of your appreciation.

Here’s a little something for you little people.

Now days it’s just another excuse to go shopping to pick up some more stuff on sale that you don’t need, don’t really want and will eventually end up in a box somewhere.

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed your Christmas Eve and Christmas gatherings. I know the Wons did. They pre-recorded their annual Christmas greeting to the little people while still in Washington so it wouldn’t intrude on valuable family time in Hawaii.

I guess somebody on the PR payroll advised Barry that he had to say something about Christians on Christmas – you know, like he praises Muslims during Ramadan - so in a rather weird Christmas message he denounced the persecution of Christians in the Middle East. Better late than never butt it was strange in that he mentioned only “ISIL” as the persecutors. Evem though it is widely known that Christiantiy is tolerated in places like Saudi Arabia about as well as it was in the former USSR. And as WND pointed out:

Just issuing a Christmas message deploring the persecution of believers in Syria and Iraq – two countries the Obama administration has messed up badly with its incoherent policies that have actually helped ISIS – rings a little hollow.

Butt hey – it’s the lack of thought that counts, right?

Anyway, you’ll be glad to know that the Wons enjoyed their Christmas Eve dinner at the trendy (natch) MW restaurant that features Hawaiian fare and cocktails made from local ingredients (natch). So what is your traditional Christmas Eve fare? Lasagna? Chili? Goulash? Next year you might want to consider adding some traditional Hawaiian fare like the Obama family does. Here are a few suggestions from the locovore MW restaurant you might want to try:

Kurobuta pork chop Spicy Korean Style Pork, Sauteed Nagaimo, Ho Farms Vegetables $ 39

 

Or maybe some duck confit?

Or how about one of the house specials, “beef and foie gras” - Braised Shortribs, Seared Hudson Valley Foie Gras, Truffled Smashed Potatoes $45

Hudson Valley foie gras? I wonder which part of Oahu that’s in?

And don’t even get me started on the truffles…

So I leave you with this final Boxing Day thought:

So watch out for that left jab Barry, ISIL as you like to call them, could shatter that glass jaw of yours.

Linked By: BlogsLucianneLoves, and Free Republic, Thanks!

Cross-Posted on Patriot Action Network

Merry Christmas 2015

And, lo, the angel of the Lord came upon them, and the glory of the Lord shone round about them: and they were sore afraid. And the angel said unto them, fear not: for, behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people. 

For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Savior, which is Christ the Lord.  And this shall be a sign unto you; ye shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger. And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God, and saying, Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men.

Merry Christmas from MOTUS, Raj and Little Mo to all of our wonderful friends who’ have built a very special family here. 

We love each and everyone of you and wish you all have a Christmas day filled with merry and bright.

“God bless us, everyone!”

Christmas Eve 2015: Mele Kalikimaka!

I give up; I can’t keep up with the ever shifting sands of racism and political correctness. One day Santa is okay, butt his sidekick, Black Pete is unacceptable. The next day it’s Santa who’s unacceptable: too white, fat, too privileged:

In the twinkle of an eye, only black guys matter:

And then of course there’s the monkey controversy: first, all monkeys are deemed racist,

…until they aren’t.

Honestly, this new world order is a nightmare; like being trapped in an Ikea store at Christmas time. 

Anyway, we’ll sort through all this next year. For now, it’s Christmas Eve and everyone’s busy, busy, busy. So, as I’ve done for 7 years straight (which makes it a tradition), I’ll just post my perennial Christmas Eve singing Christmas card from sunny Hawaii. Relax and enjoy the mellow strains of Bing Crosby as you go about your busy day. And as they say in Hawaii: Mele Kalikimaka!

MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL, AND TO ALL A GOOD NIGHT!

And now I must go sit in the corner and think about what I’ve done here. I think I’ll have some of Betty Ann’s eggnog.

Linked By: BlogsLucianneLoves, and Free Republic, Thanks!

Cross-Posted on Patriot Action Network

Can You Find the Trans-Panda in the Sea of White Privilege?

Remember Father Guido Sarducci’s "Find the Pope in the Pizza" contest? I was a yuuge fan!

“Find the Pope in the Pizza” from George Nimeh on Vimeo.

Well, it’s been culturally appropriated by somebody whose white privilege is clearly showing; he designed the  viral “Find the Panda in the (trigger warning) SNOWmen” winter holiday puzzle.

See if you’re up to the challenge:

 

Apparently there is officially only one panda - eighth row from the top, fourth from the right.
I, however, found a second – ninth row from the top, ninth from the right. OK, I’ll grant you it’s probably a trans-panda butt trans are pandas too.

If you found zim too, you may be suffering from conspiracy-theory-itis. There is no known cure butt you may find relief by wearing a tinfoil hat.

Check your white privilege test: do you see white on black or black on white?

Remember, there’s no “correct” answer, only a privileged or non-privileged response.

I’m off shortly to embark on my MOTUS Family Christmas tour of duty so please be nice while I’m out of sight. Or if you’re going to be naughty please go sit in the corner for awhile and think about what you’ve done.

Oh, and please keep those recipes rolling in. If I have time I’ll post my Feast of the Seven Fishes calamari recipe from the road.

Linked By: Larwyn’s Linx on Doug Ross@Journal, and BlogsLucianneLoves, and Free Republic, Thanks!
Cross-Posted on Patriot Action Network