Saturday, December 17, 2011

T4T Hits & Mrs.

As in past years Lady M delivered a sack of toys to the Toy’s for Tots program, that Staff members were asked to donate to the cause. It’s part of our annual holiday gift extortion program in which Big White staff members are required requested to “donate” toys to Lady M’s sack so she can “contribute” it for redistribution by the Marines.

mo haulin'

Perhaps it was because we departed for warmer climes immediately after this last photo op of the campaign year, butt I thought we looked more festive than in our previous Toy’s for Tot’s outings. Although we always like to wear a touch of our signature festive holiday color: black.

At last year’s appearance at Toy’s for Tots, we did our best Santa from the 'hood impersonation:

mo and giant santaI’m Down wid Santa, yo!

And here we are back in 2009, before we really got the whole “military families” thing. Nobody looked very happy here. Even though we wore our festive black bow shirt.

[610x[4].jpg]

In our last official sacrifice of this year, Lady M took time to thank some of the little people.

This is hard work.  It takes people who take time out of their own families, time to come, shop, sort toys, make sure things get out.  I mean, this doesn't happen automatically; it happens because people give up time, precious time with their families to make this happen.  So this wouldn't be possible without all of the volunteers.  So I want to extend a very big thank you to all of you, especially all of our troops and all of our military families who have led this effort this year, and who lead it every year. 

I know that might sound like MO’s on autopilot, butt may I remind you that it’s been a very long year of sacrificin’ around here. Who wouldn’t be a little burned out?

However, there was a special little highlight at this year’s T4T event. After all, how many times does Lady M get hit on?

do you think I could meet buh-rack

dominique-strauss-kahn-obama-barackI mean by someone who’s not on “The Registry” (DSK, Bo, MO 2009)

While the official story is that Lance Cpl. Aaron Leeks asked MO to attend the Marine Corps Ball with him next year, you’ll see in the video that Lady M called an aide over to handle the request. I couldn’t hear the exchange between them, butt usually when this sort of thing happens it’s Big Guy’s calendar that they’re more interested in.

Butt Lance Cpl. Leeks looks like a very nice young man, he was probably just being polite. And if that’s not his girlfriend standing to the right in this picture, it must be his girlfriend’s sister ‘cuz she doesn’t look any too happy about this little tête à tête.

Screenshot Studio capture #346

Or maybe she just wanted a little hug from Lady M herself:

part

Anyway, we punted this one into the oval office: MO told Aaron that she would have to check with Big Guy. Because he’s the decider.

And that’s why he’s staying behind while we start enjoying the island breezes: to decide who to blame if Congress doesn’t pass his bill to save the middle class from the re-imposition of a horrendous payroll tax. He’s done everything he could: he even ordered Congress to stay here until they pass his bill.

And now after we’ve already had to charter Air Force Won Too (at an extra $100k) to fly Lady M, the Wee Wons, and a whole bunch of stuff to Hawaii while Big Guy stays in Washington to do the work of the unions, environmentalists and crony capitalists – it looks like Congress struck a 2 month deal!

And it’s a win-win: R-words get a vote on the Keystone XL Pipeline, Big Guy gets to extend the (Bush) Payroll Tax reduction (that he was against before he was for) and we all get to stop watching the stupid Big White count down to middle class catastrophe:

 

Screenshot Studio capture #347

Click to watch the seconds click away to Armageddon

 

The President said that Congress cannot go home without preventing a tax increase on 160 million hardworking Americans, and the deal announced tonight meets that test. This is an important step towards enacting a key provision of the President’s American Jobs Act and a significant victory for the American people and the economy, because as independent analysts have said, failing to extend this tax cut would have had a damaging effect on our recovery and job growth. The President urges Congress now to finish up their business for the American people.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Now that we dodged that bullet, maybe Big Guy can squeeze in a little relaxation before joining Lady M in Hawaii. Maybe a late season round of golf, a little one on one, a game of catch, some fantasy football or a sleepover.

 President Barack Obama plays basketball with personal aide Reggie Love at St Bartholomew's Church in New York City, where the President is attending the United Nations General Assembly,  Sept. 23, 2009.   (Official White House photo by Pete Souza)

This official White House photograph is being made available only for publication by news organizations and/or for personal use printing by the subject(s) of the photograph. The photograph may not be manipulated in any way and may not be used in commercial or political materials, advertisements, emails, products, promotions that in any way suggests approval or endorsement of the President, the First Family, or the White House.President Barack Obama practices his pitching form with personal aide Reggie Love and Jake Levine in the Rose Garden of the White House, March 31, 2010. Later that day, the President threw out the first pitch on opening day of the baseball season prior to the game between the Washington Nationals and the Philadelphia Phillies. 

This official White House photograph is being made available only for publication by news organizations and/or for personal use printing by the subject(s) of the photograph. The photograph may not be manipulated in any way and may not be used in commercial or political materials, advertisements, emails, products, promotions that in any way suggests approval or endorsement of the President, the First Family, or the White House. 
golf clubbing 

 President Barack Obama and White House staffers aboard Air Force One to Paris on June 5, 2009  (Official White House photo by Pete Souza)

This official White House photograph is being made available for publication by news organizations and/or for personal use printing by the subject(s) of the photograph. The photograph may not be manipulated in any way or used in materials, advertisements, products, or promotions that in any way suggest approval or endorsement of the President, the First Family, or the White House.Reggie_Love_1

After all Big Guy’s play date friend is going back to school in January.

President Barack Obama and personal aide Reggie Love stand in a hallway of the Eisenhower Executive Office Building of the White House after dropping by an African Growth and Opportunity Act (AGOA) meeting, Aug. 3, 2010. (Official White House Photo by Pete Souza)
This official White House photograph is being made available only for publication by news organizations and/or for personal use printing by the subject(s) of the photograph. The photograph may not be manipulated in any way and may not be used in commercial or political materials, advertisements, emails, products, promotions that in any way suggests approval or endorsement of the President, the First Family, or the White House.

Linked By: Larwyn’s Linx on Doug Ross@Journal, and sb on Weasel Zippers, and Attercliffe on Lucianne.com, Thanks!

Friday, December 16, 2011

Portraits and Postcards from our Vacation in the Big White

New official family Holiday portrait! And there’s a whole lot of posed hand-holding here.

new family photo-*H/T Fausta

Alas: a sign of the times we used Big White photographer Pete Souza for this portrait instead of Annie Leibovitz like we did for our historic, first First Family photo back in 2009. That saved us almost $250k right there since Pete Souza only makes about that much all year, whereas Annie charges that much for one photo shoot. And Lady M’s wearing recycled again: this a little black number from September 11th:

mobo walkin away

If that color strikes you as odd for the holiday portrait, remember, it’s an unspecified holiday portrait. Perhaps it’s actually commemorating Pearl Harbor Day.

And we have established the tradition of Black for our holiday portraits, as you see here in  Annie’s photo back when everybody loved Black in the Big White:

Back in the day: This is the previous Christmas card, released in 2009 and shot by Annie Leibovitz2009 First Family portrait

Don’t get our new portrait mixed up with this year’s official Big White Holiday Greeting Card – that would be this adorable painting of our adorable Little Bo posed by the fireplace:

WH-CHISTMAS%20CARD%20AOfficial 2011 Holiday Card

I’m not sure how much the painting cost, butt I think it was done by one of the starving artists at OWS. So that’s another job created or saved.

Anyway, we’re really busy packing up the last minute shipping crate of wardrobe accessories for our Hawaiian vacay, so all I can give you is a quick recap of some of this week’s news stories that I didn’t get a chance to report on yet.

First, let me be perfectly clear: Eric Holder did not INTEND to lie to Congressman Issa about those walkin’ guns.

Screenshot Studio capture #340H/T BKeyser

His intent was to convince him that he was the most ill-informed Attorney General to have ever served in that capacity. (While simultaneously advancing and anti-gun agenda – our administration is known for our multi-tasking.)

Governor Corzine didn’t INTEND to comingle clients money with investment funds and inadvertently lose billions of dollars.

Screenshot Studio capture #343If your intent is not to lie, it’s best to keep your lips zipped      H/T BKeyser

His intend was to cover his losses by doubling down on his bet. (Note: seldom works in Vegas, obviously doesn’t work in European markets either.)

And Governor Rod Blagojevich didn’t INTEND to sell Big Guy’s Senate seat.

20090129_blago_evidence_33

He intended to auction it off to the highest bidder.

obamaseatforsalepng

And just a quick overview of last night’s R-word debate: Newt pouted, Mitt puffed, Perry Tebowed, Michelle smacked a couple of the guys around, Ron stuck his head further into the burning sands of the Middle East and Jon and Rick were MIA. So basically, we could have skipped this one.

The only interesting note coming out of it is that the MSM, believing that they have already adequately neutralized Michelle Bachmann, now feels safe enough to note that she’s actually a “skilled debater.”

Really? Who would know? I mean, unless you actually listened to her. Instead of spending all your time ridiculing her and trying to morph her into your new “Dumb Sarah” doll.

palin-bachmannDANGER! DANGER! DANGER! GOOD LOOKING REPUBLICAN WOMEN BELIEVIN’ IN THE CONSTITUTION! SHOOT ON SIGHT!

And then I have just this little side note: Romney has been cleared of charges that he used a KKK slogan in his stump speeches. Because he didn’t. Despite what Ms.NBC erroneously reported.

As Professor Reynolds reported:

Conservative blogs called out MSNBC for the report, and when executives at MSNBC and NBC News saw that, they were disturbed that the blog’s observation was reported as fact, without any added reporting.

That’s pretty much how they do everything: Without any added reporting.

MSM: can’t live with ‘em, butt sure as hell can live without them.

Need I say more?

Love the candy cane tie, butt oh,oh! Isn’t that a Christian symbol?

No wonder the Post office is in trouble.

Screenshot Studio capture #345note: not real US postal stamp

See you in Hawaii.

Linked By: Michelle Obama on Business Insider (Thanks Lady M!), and The Radio Patriot, Thanks!

Thursday, December 15, 2011

Did He Really Say That?

Today I’m running a special edition of the “Did He Really Say That?” contest. I’ve got two heavy weight contenders: POTUS and VPOTUS. I report, you deride.

To appreciate Big Guy’s entry we have to review the run up to the comment entered in today’s competition. It occurred at Fort Bragg, where he was bragging about ending Bush’s “dumb” war in Iraq:

Now, I’m sure you realize why I don’t like following Michelle Obama.  (Laughter.) 

 

MO fat butt

She’s pretty good.  And it is true, I am a little biased, but let me just say it:  Michelle, you are a remarkable First Lady. 

 

MO doggy

 

You are a great advocate for military families.  (Applause.) 

 

michelle-obama_nich

 

And you’re cute.  (Applause.)

mo cat lady

 

I’m just saying -- gentlemen, that’s your goal: to marry up.  (Laughter.) 

 

movin

Punch above your weight.

WTF?…DID HE REALLY SAY THAT!!??

Oy! “Punch above your weight”? Is he punch-drunk? Are those negative poll numbers finally getting to him? Yikes! If he thinks he’s taking a beating in the polls, wait until he gets back to the East Wing.

             mo's backside

Cripes, for the smartest man in the world, that was sooooo not smart.

And who besides Big Guy and Lady M could manage to make the official end of a “dumb” war all about them:

Oh, and I thought you’d like to know: in the interest of our new frugality measures, Lady M wore recycled for the occasion: the blouse from her first Babwah Walters interview. Because after all, does ending a “dumb” war really warrant getting a new outfit?

        mo babs  sweater mo

Babwah - talk about punching above your weight…

We let Jay-Jay handle the hot question of the day: Does Big Guy still think Iraq was a “dumb” war, Mr. Presidential Press Secretary?

Reporters tried again on the flight to North Carolina, noting the many sacrifices made over the last decade of the war to ask Press Secretary Jay Carney: “Was it worth it?” Carney also was cautious. “History will judge whether the war was worth it,” he said, adding, “The president’s position has not changed, which is that he did not support getting into this war, did not support the way that the previous administration led us to war in Iraq. And he made that clear during the campaign and that’s not a position that’s changed.”

I take it that’s a “yes.”

Butt I digress. Today’s second entry in the “Did He Really Say That?” contest is none other than Joey B - a past winner many times over, butt still a perennial contender. He was recently interviewed by Esquire, who produced a highly edited article of some of Joey’s more, uh, discrete thoughts. Among the best:

… I would argue that this president has had more land on his plate from the day he got in office than any other president – including Franklin Roosevelt.”

Hee hee. I know we want to compare our self to FDR, so that would explain why Bush’s recession is now “much worse than anyone thought” butt seriously, we haven’t been dragged into a third world war by an air attack by a foreign country from the East. I sure hope that’s not in our re-election plan book.

Butt here’s Joey’s entry for today’s contest:

My dad used to say, "You know you're a success when you look at your kids and realize they turned out better than you." I am a success. But I should have had one Republican who wanted to be an investment banker and make a lot of money so that when they put me in a home, I get a window with a view.

Because there aren’t any Democratic investment bankers:

Today’s winner gets a window with a view.

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Drowning in the Shallowness of it All

I guess we’re changing our political slogan of the month from “Pass the Bill NOW!” to “Veto the Bill NOW!” I’ll have to get clarification on our 180 degree turn, butt I believe it has something to do with the new payroll tax bill extension coming only in size XL.

We’ve had a ban on Holiday gifts in size XL ever since we moved in here. You see, “XL” designates everything that’s wrong with America: the belief that things can always grow, expand, get bigger. When in fact what we really need to do is learn how to get by with less.

In fact, we haven’t allowed anything marked “XL” in the Big White since day Won.

  First Lady On TVOf course that ban has a downside

Butt the Big White staff does have some ideas to help you complete your holiday shopping - while at the same time contributing to a good cause. Can’t think of what to get for those pesky Republican friends and relatives of yours? Smootie has the perfect gift suggestion: a donation to Big Guy’s campaign in their name! Because after all, isn’t “Christmas” all about spreading the spirit of peace on earth, goodwill towards men?

In a fundraising note to supporters, deputy campaign manager Julianna Smoot on Tuesday suggested making a donation “inspired by your favorite conservative friend or relative,” especially if that person is fond of spreading right-wing chatter about the president.

Donors can alert their conservative friends to the contributions, or simply let them know “someone” has given money to Obama on their behalf. “It will drive them nuts!” Smoot wrote.

Twisting the knife further, she suggested supporters should watch their Republican friends go through the primary process and “kindly remind them we have our candidate, and we’re proud of it.”

Wow (last month’s new slogan/strategery)! Way to remember the “Reason for the season” Smootie!

SaturnaliaKeeping the Saturn in Saturnalia since 2009

After all, the Progs live by the axiom “The only thing better than getting what you wished for…

big guy

is getting more than you wished for:

Obama-Alien-Greeting-Boy-at-Door--59096

In other news today: Lady M and Big Guy will both be appearing in a victory lap at Fort Bragg to celebrate Big Guy’s leadership from behind.

Take a memo: “I said, end this war now!”

Now can we just get back to doing the work of the American People? We’ve still got a lot to do before our work is done here. Butt it looks like everything is going per plan. So far.

There was a time when even the NYT thought Americans had “too much common sense to be deluded by the shallow sophistries of…Socialism.” Now, I’m not sure you’d want to take that bet. Not for ten cents or ten thousand dollars. Entitlements tend to change the odds.

flood_6inch_impacts-600x405Let me be clear: millions have drowned in the shallowness of super socialism’s sophistry.

America: Take it Back. ABO 2012

We can do it. Yes we Can Can.

one-term-yes-we-can

Linked By: American Digest (Check out the incredible “Timelapse Journey”), and tweeted by Zilla of the Resistance, Thanks!

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Christmas time in the City: jackboots, silver boots and thigh-highs

Well, finally!  Following the certification for her world-wide Jumping Jackathon Lady M has gone into the  Guinness Book of World Records as winning!

Well here – I’ll Let Lady M tell you about it herself:

Only when powered by government math-a-magics can 464 kids on the Big White lawn morph into a record breaking 300,265 around the globe! Lady M shattered the old record by over 280,000! This ability to coalesce our forces and multiply our numbers bodes well for our re-election efforts around the country.

And you would think that would be enough for one day, butt that was only the beginning of historical events at the Big White yesterday. Big Guy also ended one of George Bush’s wars. Formal remarks to follow.

232x151And now, back to you, Nouri

Butt before we get back to that, and Lady M’s busy afternoon schedule, I have a quick wrap up from the weekend. Some of you have been asking for details on the sparkly shoes Lady M wore at the Christmas in Washington concert on Sunday:

sparkly shoes    drag queen pumps   Lust-2001, 3 3/4 Inch Heel Stretch <em>Glitter</em> Costume Knee Boot - ...

Yes, they are from the Drag Queen collection, butt just be grateful we didn’t go with the full height silver boot which was also in contention. And speaking of boots, we got our over-the-knee-and-to-the-thigh brown suede boots out to read Christmas (!) stories to the children at the Children’s National Medical Center yesterday.

slim santa moEvery picture tells a story

 

future member of the young republican club What do you see: a love struck young man, or a future Young Republican?

And guess what? Little Bo got to tag along because the kids seem to love him.

mo and little bo

Some of you were concerned about that unnatural bulge – the one on Lady M’s back – that we see here:

2011-12-12t224844z_1701445973_gm1e7cd0ixp01_rtrmadp_3_usa-obamaIt’s nothing to worry about. I’m not at liberty to divulge the precise nature and purpose of the device, butt I can tell you that it is not a wireless network box for direct communications with the Shake Shack.

The story reading event was a big hit with everyone. Little Bo even found somebody to love.

smooches

Meanwhile, back in the anti-war room, Big Guy was still taking his bows for ending the war that he “strongly opposed” while running for the Big White; saying that “I think history will judge the original decision to go into Iraq,”  he did add that because of the huge sacrifices by American soldiers and civilians and the courage of the Iraqi people, “we have now achieved an Iraq that is self-governing, that is inclusive and that has enormous potential.”

And we all know how important it is to be "inclusive."

AssadAhmadinejad

To paraphrase Charles de Gaulle: Iraq has a great future. Butt it always will.