Our First Ladies of Sweetness and Light, before the Military Family Launch
As you know FLOTUS and SLOTUS launched their plan to support military families last week, and then took to the air to spread the word.
I thought I’d take this opportunity to share a few of the remarks they made as they crisscrossed the country doing good works for the American people in general, and military families in particular.
Dateline, Camp Lejeune, North Carolina
The Big White Ladies show up with the laundry
DR. JILL: Hello. I'm Jill Biden, and -- gosh, thanks for inviting us here today. We're so excited. And thank you to Martha Stewart. Gosh, she's done a great job. (Applause.) And thank you to the ladies who are in charge of Operation Shower. They've done a great job. [Gosh.]
LADY M: Wow. So are you all having fun? Is this fun? Have you gotten into the fun part of it?
So how many of you are first-time moms? Oh, so most of you are. That's very -- you know, just thinking back on -- you know, my youngest is nine, will be 10. I enjoyed my pregnancy. I enjoyed every minute of it. And I hope you all are enjoying every minute of it.
Lady M is so empathetic, she can place herself in any situation.
And here she is, trying to relieve the new moms’ anxiety:
And that's one of the things that most Americans don't realize, is that you guys have to do this alone sometimes, and you're doing it not knowing whether your spouse is okay, or will be okay, which adds to the stress. It adds to the pressure.
Note to self: next time, let’s try this with a focus group first.
That's what Joining Forces is all about. It's asking every sector of this society to step up and support you all, because you all are serving in your own way. And the children that will be born will be serving, too. They're serving right now this country…
It’s probably just me, butt this sounds - just a teensie tiny bit – like Lady M is talking down to these women. Maybe we could punch it up a bit, perhaps to a 6th grade level, before we go back on the road?
And we did this at the White House. We brought you guys White House onesies and blankets. We took up a drive. We had boxes all over the West Wing and the East Wing. People wrote checks. We brought -- I mean, this was fun.
I’m sure our military moms are glad that Lady M and Dr. Jill had fun while your staffs took up a collection. It shows how much you care.
So I want to thank you, ladies, for holding it together, because you all look great. You all look pretty doggone good. [ed. and we all know that’s what’s important: looks] And we're just so proud of you all. Proud of you all, proud of you for holding it together while your man is doing something hard. (Laughter.) And there's nothing like having a man that's doing something hard, right, Jill?
(Laughter.) Sheesh. (Laughter and applause.)
Sheesh, indeed! Maybe we should practice that little routine in front of a “mirror” too. It doesn’t sound quite right.
So with that, we're going to have each of you come up so we can meet you, take a picture, if you'd like. And then we'll do a big group shot. So we'll have a class picture.
Group hug! And photo-op. That’s how you can tell we really, really care.
Dr. Jill demonstrates how to wear horizontal stripes correctly
LADY M: … all of this that you see around is donated by the community -- 100 percent of every salary of every brick of every piece of wood, of every bit of food. This is all done by the community…This family center is an example of how communities step up and support the military families and the troops. And they do it with their own dollars, with their own energy.
What!!? You mean “community” can actually do something on their own? Without Big Guy’s permission? Without the government? Who knew? Butt “100 percent of every salary of every brick of every piece of wood” – they’re paying the bricks and dead wood now? That does sound more like government.
And this is the kind of thing that individuals and businesses and nonprofits working together can create. So this is our task. We want to travel the nation, showing and lifting up and shining a light on models like these to give people around the country the inspiration and the ideas they need.
Whoa! We are wading dangerously deep into enemy territory now: “individuals and businesses and nonprofits?” Not the government!? Oh, I get it – because it’s the military, right? Butt wait, isn’t the military the one thing we ALL agree is a function of the federal government? I’m so confused. Maybe if I read the 2700 pages of the ObamaCare bill, I’ll figure it out.
Dr. Jill, squeezed in between two icons: this is an “advanced” entry in the “which doesn’t belong and why?” contest
DR JILL: Hi. The kids are probably saying, "Who?" (Laughter.) Anyways -- well, nice to see you. It's nice to be here. I'm Jill Biden.
We’re off to a good start, anyways. And in the interest of keepin’ things realz, Dr. Jill has decided to drop the “Dr.” part of her name for our First-Ladies-in-support-of-military families tour.
LADY M: Great! We are excited to be here. This has been a big day for Jill and myself because yesterday we launched this huge national initiative. We're calling it Joining Forces, as Jill mentioned. We're rallying the country to make sure they're aware of your stories, you guys' stories, because you know you are heroes just like your parents are? Do you realize that? Because you all are sacrificing. Your lives have been turned upside down, but you guys are doing it with grace, and we're so, so very proud of you.
OK, this time she actually is talking to 8 year olds. I know. It’s sometimes hard to tell.
And today we've been all over the country. Just today do you know how many cities we've been to in just one day? We were in North Carolina, then we flew to San Antonio, and now we're here! And tomorrow we're going to Ohio. We're all over the place because we're trying to spread the word.
I think even many 8 year olds know that North Carolina and Ohio aren’t cities.
By the time our multiple-degreed and credentialed First Ladies arrived for their multiple appearances in Columbus, Ohio they were pretty much exhausted.
You can tell from Lady M’s remarks, because she pretty much handed it off to everyone else, instead of talking about what she was doing. Besides, now that the R-Words have swept in to rule the Buckeye state, we’ve pretty much dropped it from our plans to WTF. Here are a few excerpts from her less than 4 minutes of comments at the USO event (2 minutes of which were applause):
Let’s give Jill a round of applause. (Applause.)…
Yay, Mayor Coleman! (Applause.)…
So let’s give them a round of applause. (Applause.)…
Again, let’s give them another big hand. (Applause.)…
And I think that, again, we have to give you guys another big round of applause. (Applause.)
We’re going to come down and shake some hands. (Applause.)
Again, I can see the beneficial effect a few sweet rolls and sugary, caffeinated beverages might have before these events.
Butt then again, we worked so hard to lose that last 5 pounds… maybe broccoli and wheatgrass would be a better choice.