Thursday, December 23, 2021

This Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things: Socialist Christmas Edition

Weren’t we just talking about Sweden’s Gävle goat aka Gävlebocken 2 weeks ago? Why, yes, we were.


Unfortunately, Sweden's giant straw yule goat is like catnip for arsonists; it’s been torched again.

sweden yulegoat burning 2001

The Gävle Goat spokesperson says she doesn't understand why people want to destroy it. I see her point, BLM doesn’t even have a field office in Gävle. A lot of people just shrug it off as part of the tradition. Socialists - of all colors and stripes – do seem to enjoy destroying tradition.

washington statueAppropriately enough, this defaced statue stood in Druid Park

The problem might be the Swedes commitment to postmodern deconstructionism. The very first year the goat  statue was installed (1966) someone burned it down on New Year's Eve. Through the years assassins - one dressed as Santa Claus and one as a gingerbread man — have shot the goat with burning arrows, doused it with accelerant or simply flicked their Bic. In 2010, someone attempted to abduct it with a helicopter. And in years where it’s too damp with snow they’ve been known to resort to smashing and stomping it to death, the ultimate expression of disapproval. During its 53-year-history, the goat has only survived unscathed 15 times.

sweden-yulegoatThe bones of the goat are all that remain after the torching

Some people have suggested that perhaps the whole concept of a horned, cloven hoofed animal representing Christmas is what drives grown men (current suspect arrested is 40) to vandalism. Nah, I’m going with it’s the socialism. 

fox-news-tree-on-fire-2-.pngWarning: progressives remain deeply committed to bringing socialism to our shores.

Socialism is why we can’t have nice things anymore. I don’t want to be more like Sweden.I want to be more like America (was). And remember: Rudy the Red-nosed Reindeer is also a horned, cloven hoofed animal representing Christmas. Don’t shoot Rudy with arrows.

reindeer happy dance gif