Lady M was reading this the other day about eco-friendly bamboo luxury fibers being used in high-end fashion such as Viridis Luxe - favored by the eco-elites in Hollywood – when a little light went off in her head. Why not use her clout to promote not only healthy eating, but healthy dressing as well? Better living through organics!
So now we’re going to expand the Big White’s organic garden to include fruits and veggies suitable for high fashion. MO wanted to put in a bamboo grove, but the Secret Service nixed that idea for security reasons: too much cover for potential evil doers.
Besides, as it turns out the luxury fibers aren’t so eco-friendly after all. Apparently to create fabric, “it's chopped up and dissolved in toxic solvents—the same process that recycles wood scraps into viscose or rayon.” Eeeeuuu! Who knew?
So we considered other eco-friendly crops. Cotton was out for obvious reasons.
Flax is still in the running, although it’s pretty hard to consider linen “luxury” along any lines other than you need a staff of servants to keep it ironed.
So MO has pretty much settled on sweet potatoes. Pretty fibrous, and delicious with those little marshmallows.
We have all winter to iron out the details. We need to find a fiber manufacturer who can process the sticky fibers without chemicals. Apparently there’s no such process known to man yet, which is the same teensy-tiny problem the bamboo people have encountered as well, but like I said, we have all winter. As well as George Soros’ entire empire at our disposal: how hard can it be? Besides, he’s already committed to Big Guy that if he can create or save 1million jobs by pursuing an eco-friendly process for turning sweet potatoes into silk.
Lady M is going to delegate that processing part, maybe to Eric Holder, in order to focus on her strong suit, design, We’ve lined up a whole list of designers, and Lady M can’t wait to share some of her very own creative fashion ideas with them.
How can this not be a win-win deal for everyone?
So watch for our new Spring line of wearable vegan resort wear!
As well as a full line of handbags and millinery:
And even feminine undergarments:
A full line of eco-friendly, totally sustainable fashion. Good enough to eat. Mmm, mmm, mmm!
We’re still not sure what to call Lady M’s fashion line. Let me know which of these you like best: “Greening Your Seaming”, or “Gussets and Russets?” We’ve already rejected “Gowns of Greens: Made From Beans” and “Casual Cords Made From Gourds.” Just too wordy.
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In my humble opinion I think the line should be named "MO gussets and russets".
ReplyDeleteLove the idea although I think the lowly potato could be used as it's so starchy and could likely be used to make recyclable, disposable clothing. MO should like this. Wear once and it gets recycled so that Her fashion faux pas never reappears in the public eye!
Horrific. MOTUS, dear, have you any Windex? Maybe she can't see herself clearly in you? On second thought, no, it's not you, she's clearly delusional and thinks she's fifty pounds lighter and thirty years younger than she is.
ReplyDeleteMOTUS,
ReplyDeleteThat photo of Mrs.0 holding the sweet tater cries out for a captioning contest!!!
As a matter of fact, since MO provides so many opportunities for captioning on a daily basis, you could offer your readers a weekly chance to let their witty selves shine.
BTW..I have asked this question many a time on many a blog..WTF is that thing MO was wearing with the double cardigan and polka dot belt? I remember seeing that photo for the first time and thinking one of the security guys behind her looked like he was trying hard to keep a straight face. To me, it looks like she walked into Joanne Fabrics, purchased the cheapest looking trims she could find and then glued them onto a plain white apron. Geez.... MOTUS where were you on that day?
Funky,
ReplyDeleteMO did consider potatoes, but didn't like them for a couple of reasons: 1) They're commonly referred to as the "white" potato. She greatly preferred to use a potato of color. Peruvian purples were her fave, but a bit harder to cultivate here; 2) the unshakable connection with the decidedly low-class Mr and Mrs Potato Head.
Fuzzy,
"thinks she's fifty pounds lighter and thirty years younger than she is." Ah, don't we all! But true: some mirrors are less forgiving than others.
Anon,
Oh, I do love the weekly contest concept! I will have to consult with my techy nerds at NASA to see what might be done.
By the way the colorful middle-school art project top was worn in London and since I was banned in Britain along with Michael Savage I was unable to accompany her on that trip. Apparently some of my reflections of Saudi women in burkas (a previous administration) were considered subversive ( I flashed an ankle).
Hil is still trying to work out my clearance for the next trip. Hope it works, I sure would like to visit the Queen.
"....Hope it works, I sure would like to
ReplyDeletevisit the Queen."
-----------------------------------------------
I am positive YOU will dress appropriately and
follow PROPER protocol!!!
I just ran into this picture.....
http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Dg2BsvifoXY/ScW-NHwhXkI/AAAAAAAAAkg/3WkBnJmYkdI/s400/Obamas+garden.jpg
Breeze
Darn, that link won't work!
ReplyDeleteLet's try this pic, even though it's not as
funny...
http://thelittlechimpsociety.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/12/gothicobama.jpg
Breeze
OK, once more on the original picture, from a
ReplyDeletedifferent source:
http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3020/3015655286_a2dcbbffef.jpg
If that does not work for you, Motus, google:
OBAMAS AS AMERICAN GOTHIC PAINTING
Caption #1:
ReplyDelete"Oo-oo----I WISH!"
(Okay, okay----*sigh* -
20 Hail Mary's, 10 Our Father's....)
Seriously, MOTUS, what does MO have against liposuction? I mean, heck, she's had work done elsewhere; why not on THOSE?
ReplyDeleteMOTUS, One crop ignored completely (and I'm surprised that POTUS didn't get in on this one)...HEMP! I've heard that it's not the same kind as POTUS use(?) to smoke in college, but I'm sure a few of his favorites (Maui-Wowee?) could be mixed in with the rest of the crop and no one would notice.
ReplyDeleteThe only potential negative I can imagine might come from Bwanna Soros in keeping POTUS focused on The List of Things to Accomplish to Bring Down the USA and the Capitalist System in 2 Years". But you know, he's achieved so much on the list in just the first year, that Bwanna S. just might let him have a little R&R in the WH instead of having to travel the world while Rahm and Ax do the heavy lifting.
Actually, Mountain Mama, I really don't think
ReplyDeleteshe looked too bad until she moved into the
W.H., then she put one way too many #s!
I don't think she eats enough of her own veggies......
Breeze
Anon: Perhaps she doesn't want to add "glow in the dark" to her "look".
ReplyDelete"that thing MO was wearing with the double cardigan and polka dot belt?" (outfit in London)
ReplyDeleteThe best bet is that she let the girls decide what she wore. Either that, or they switch out closets once in awhile. I can certainly understand the guy behind her trying to hold it in. I certainly didn't succeed holding it in when I first viewed the photo! This was during the early days of MO being proclaimed as a proud, bold new fashion stepping out in the world! I thought what proud, bold new fashion world they were a part of!
Breeze,
ReplyDeleteGot the pics: they're great. Will save for future application.
MM,
I think you better double up on the HM,OF's. And re. lipo: she just doesn't see it. That's probably my fault.
Annie,
What a great idea for getting him off cigarettes. And don't worry about George. He knows BO isn't all that necessary at this point.
Cricket,
You might even say this is the look that launched our fashion icon. You're probably right about the girls though.