Friday, August 19, 2011

No Economy is an Island, Entire of Itself

michelle-obamaArrival on the Rock, c. 2010

I know you’ve been suffering LMWS (Lady M Withdrawal Syndrome), and there’s been speculation about Lady M undergoing, ahem, cosmetic “enhancements” while she’s been out of sight. As is often the case in these situations, our imaginations are far more interesting than the truth.

MO’s just been busy. Last week was spent on the normal pre-vacay preparations: chelation, detox, manicure, pedicure, waxing, buffing and shining. Then there was the always difficult and complicated process of selecting an appropriate new vacation wardrobe from the gear sent over by our designers. And of course, we needed to choose a few trinkets from our favorite jewelers that might be appropriate for vacationing amidst millionaires and billionaires who can afford to pay a little more.

michelle_obama_tom_binns_3

In short, Lady M was doing her bit to stimulate the economy. With all that stress, when do you suppose she had time to undergo cosmetic surgery procedures? Other than the Botox and Restylane I mean?

We’re going to make the most of this vacation, because Pluff-Daddy has already advised the Wons that, if they want to stay the Wons, they won’t be vacationing on the Vineyards next year ahead of the elections. He’s thinking of Frontier Days in Cheyenne instead.

So, since we’ll be doing a whole bunch of sacrificin’ from now on, we’ve got a lot of luxuriating to squeeze in ahead of Big Guy getting back to D.C.. Once he announces his jobs plan to create or save millions more American jobs in order to avoid ANOTHER worldwide recession, it will be work, work, work.

 unemployment-3All worldwide recessions worth their salt begin at home

You will be happy to know that Lady M and the Wee Wons arrived here on Martha’s Vineyard yesterday afternoon – and guess what! Little Bo got to come last night with Big Guy! Don’t worry, I’ll look out for him and make sure he doesn’t eat any dead water fowl.

So, just to carry you over until we get a few snaps from this year’s happy family, here are a few memories from  previous years’ island adventures with the Wons:

mo icecream

Above, we have a candid shot from one of last year’s ice cream runs: Lady M is sporting the backwards-forward look that we pioneered. Big Guy later adopted that approach for his economic program. Although I’m not sure either of them can actually claim to have invented the concept.

Jimmy Carter Miss Me Yet

Below, we donned casual gear for a biking workout around the island.

noon feedingLady M’s wife beater biker look, c. 2010

This look, ironically, is one that both Big Guy and Lady M have been known to sport:

Obama Addresses Health Insurance Reform George fe24QDAiJfvl

He: single white wife beater. She, double white wife beaters. Let’s not have a “best guns” contest.

bcb30_MICHELLE-OBAMA.jleaving the vineyardLeaving the Rock, 2010

And here’s the adorable little baby doll dress that we wore to dinner at the Sweet Life CafĂ© that sparked one of those perennial “baby mama” rumors. As if.

michelle-obama-martha's-vineyard-the-sweet-cafe-narciso-rodriguez

BTY, there were two fundraisers held for Big Guy last night butt he didn’t go to either of them. What did they expect though, they were only charging $1000 a head. What with all the pressures facing us right now, Big Guy can’t afford to show up for anything under $10,000.

Well, that will have to do for now. I’ve got to run, Lady M wants to try on some new gear that just arrived from our favorite designers, “on loan,” of course.

Big Guy will be playing a round today at Mink Meadows (don’t you just love that name?) before getting back to save the world from the pending alien invasion. No, not Islamo-terrorists, silly. And no, certainly not Mexican drug dealers or day workers “willing to do the work Americans won’t do” either. We’re talking serious aliens, like in the Matrix or something:

Bad news from NASA: If we don’t reduce carbon emissions, the aliens might come and kill us.

So don’t think that Big Guy is just “vacationing” here on the Rock. He’s busy with his newest economic advisor (Paul Krugman) planning the next World War. Because sometimes you have to destroy the economy in order to save it.

6042290958_298f203843_zposter credit: BKeyser. Click to embiggen

“ If we discovered that, you know, space aliens were planning to attack and we needed a massive buildup to counter the space alien threat and really inflation and budget deficits took secondary place to that, this slump would be over in 18 months.”

We’re definitely not in Kansas any more. “You know?”

“And therefore never send to know for whom
the bell tolls; it tolls for thee.”

Linked By: Larwyn’s Linx on Doug Ross@Journal, Thanks!