Sunday, September 29, 2013

Garbage in, garbage out!

Did you hear about the garbage plan they’ve implemented in progressive “Mini”-sota (I changed the spelling for reasons that will be evident later) to reduce waste? Tiny trash cans:

miniature-trashcanSmaller than an illegal Big Gulp

Designed to encourage less trash-making and more recycling, they limit what employees can toss before they have to dump the collection into a bigger can down the hall. On the side of each can is written, “This is all the GARBAGE I make!”


mini trash can

Because I guess it’s a given that if you don’t provide large trash receptacles for people to throw their garbage into, they won’t throw away as much stuff. Or something.


Let’s see how it’s working in Detroit, where I understand people are so poor they can’t even  afford large trash cans. Plus, I don’t think they pick garbage up with any regularity now that the city’s bankrupt. 

It looks like it’s working, as far as I can tell, they’ve just decided to recycle everything:


Hey, can we get a really big recycling bin down here?

Detroit dumped-tires

Truthfully, it’s going to take awhile – by some estimates about 100 years and 3 or 4 generations - to completely recycle Detroit. Butt you can’t believe everything you hear on Fox News. And besides, that $300 million that Eric Holder (Justice Department?) brought to Detroit last week to help clean up the blight of a city $18 billion in debt should take care of everything. Right?

Anyway, back to the mini-can concept;

Despite the jokes, the change was made with earnest good intentions.”

Well, yes; aren’t they always?

DetroitDetroit: “we had to blow it up in order to save it.”

Butt hey! The mini-trashcan plan gave me a great idea! How about we use the concept to promote other “ earnest good intentions” ideas: Obamacare, for example?

obamacare garbage-ideologyMini-Obamacare: because, as it turns out, size does matter. (jackboots, size 13)

Wow! This could even be our new strategy for 2016: “Mini-mize-me: Keep Hope Alive!” We’ll offer mini-jobs, mini-paychecks, mini-healthcare, mini-wars, mini-scandals….And instead of kicking off the primaries in Iowa, we’ll move to neighboring “Mini-sota.”

And, sorry Hill, I think I know the perfect candidate to head up this mini-campaign:

Screenshot Studio capture #1374Screenshot Studio capture #1375The Mini-miser

h/t  commenter Yura Moran on Moonbattery

“Geniuses! They are frickin geniuses! Next we make them use tiny plates so they eat less, and put tiny gas tanks in their cars so they drive less. We are already giving people tiny jobs so they work less. And tiny health care so they get sick less. And tiny hopes so they dream less.”

MiniHappyMealSo eat your mini-happy meal and shut your yap! And stuff the waste in your pocket. There’ll be lots of room in there, where your money used to be.

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Cross-Posted on Patriot Action Network