"Those with power fight to make sure every rule tilts in their favor. That's what democracy is up against." —Elizabeth Warren
Right on! Right on! Right on! The most progressive wing (NetRoots) of the most progressive party convened last week in Detroit (where else?) to demand human rights for the victims of the city’s racist and inhumane water shutoffs and to unofficially acknowledge that Elizabeth Warren is Barry’s heir apparent.
Lizzie took the opportunity to outline the 11 tenets of progressivism, because 11 is a nice round number:
- "We believe that Wall Street needs stronger rules and tougher enforcement, and we're willing to fight for it." (And by “fight” I mean after we get as much from them for our campaign as possible)
- "We believe in science, and that means that we have a responsibility to protect this Earth." (I believe that is a fallacious statement, butt then again I’m not a scientist.)
- "We believe that the Internet shouldn't be rigged to benefit big corporations, and that means real net neutrality." (Again, I mean after we get our big bundling contributions from these big corporations.)
- "We believe that no one should work full-time and still live in poverty, and that means raising the minimum wage." (Fallacious statement #2)
- "We believe that fast-food workers deserve a livable wage, and that means that when they take to the picket line, we are proud to fight alongside them." (And we don’t care if that means Big Macs cost $15. We don’t think you should be eating them in the first place.)
- "We believe that students are entitled to get an education without being crushed by debt." (Might I suggest they get a job? Better education than 99% of the college curriculums offered now days, and if Elizabeth gets her way, they’ll be making $15 an hour.)
- "We believe that after a lifetime of work, people are entitled to retire with dignity, and that means protecting Social Security, Medicare, and pensions." (The operative term here is “lifetime of work”)
- "We believe—I can't believe I have to say this in 2014—we believe in equal pay for equal work." (I can’t believe believe I have to say this in 2014 - STFU!)
- "We believe that equal means equal, and that's true in marriage, it's true in the workplace, it's true in all of America." (If your Mom didn’t teach you that life isn’t fair, you will probably never grasp the intrinsic fact that human beings, by design, are not equal.)
- "We believe that immigration has made this country strong and vibrant, and that means reform." (Fallacious statement #3, whether “reform” means amnesty or open borders.)
- "And we believe that corporations are not people, that women have a right to their bodies. We will overturn Hobby Lobby and we will fight for it. We will fight for it!" (We will fight for the right to bypass the Constitution. Because some things are just too important to let it get in the way, like the right to employer paid abortifacients.)
In short, 1 percenter Lizzie focused her keynote NetRoots address on denouncing other 1 percenters who do not share her generous and caring heart. So you can add Lizzie to the growing list of progressives championing the elimination of “income inequality” by taxing the benefactors of “white privilege” who actually have jobs and work for a living. Also, you can add her to the list of charter members of the “millionaire denialism” movement:
After Liz’s stump speech, actor Mark Ruffalo (the “Hulk,” if that helps) appeared on stage to say that he was in Detroit to protest the city’s controversial water shutoffs for nonpayment:
“It’s a choice between our America and the .001%’s America,” he said.
In order to fully understand the extent of this humanitarian crisis you need to know that the Detroit Water Board - owned by the bankrupt city of Detroit – started shutting customers off for non-payment last March. At the time they had $120 million in arrears, as over half of the residential customers had already determined that water was a basic human right and therefore did not pay their bills at all. Currently the Water Board is down to a far more reasonable $90 million arrears. I’ll let Nadine, who has had her water shut off for being just $5700 in arrears, explain the inequality of this situation:
“I just cannot imagine that there’s thousands of people right here in the city that are going through this and that so many people see nothing wrong with it. They feel like, ‘Well if you didn’t pay your bill, then you shouldn’t get water.’” (h/t to my bro)
I KNOW! I can’t believe it either!!! Imagine thinking that you should have to pay for stuff like your Obama-phone, or your lobster tails! When there’s so much inequality in this country. That’s so, so…Republican. Because “millionaire denialism” only works for “dead broke” Democrats.
Anyway, I think Nadine should be allowed to run up her water bill to a nice round $9000 before anyone harasses her again. Because with the Water Board running an arrears balance of $90 million – if my math is correct – Nadine will then be a member of the .001%.
Cross-Posted on Patriot Action Network