While South Carolina counts the GOP votes, Big Guy remains in the Oval working on his SOTU speech.
Here he is with staff, counting the ways he’s been successful in circumventing the Do-nothing Congress to create Jobs, Jobs, Jobs all by himself.
Our working title for the speech so far is “Putting America back to work, one Recess Czar appointment at a time” - because we can’t wait!
Just this week, BO named tourism Job #1b (as you recall from yesterday, Job #1a is fundraising, in order to WTF). Because when tourists come to visit, they spend money (like in Las Vegas)! They go to restaurants, stay in hotels, buy at local retail (all taxed to the hilt) – all of which create jobs! See how this works?
Every year, tens of millions of tourists come from all over the world to visit America. They stay in our hotels, eat at our restaurants, and see all the sights America has to offer.
See how quickly BO is picking up on how capitalism works? He’ll be able to beat the R-words at their own game by the time November rolls around.
That’s good for local businesses. That’s good for local economies. And the more folks who visit America, the more Americans we get back to work. It’s that simple.
It is that simple. This trickle down economic trick works elsewhere too. Say you happen to have a whole bunch of people building a huge cross-country pipeline. Or possibly people drilling gas/oil wells, or mining uranium. Even though these are mostly all high paying union jobs, I guess they’re jobs that go to the union segment that we’ve already written off in our reelection bid.
We can’t wait to seize this opportunity. As I’ve said before, I will continue to work with Congress, states, and leaders in the private sector to find ways to move this country forward.
Really? Because a lot of people thought the TransCanada pipeline project might be just such an opportunity.
But where they can’t act or won’t act, I will. Because we want the world to know that America is open for business. And that’s why I announced steps we’re taking to promote America and make it easier for tourists to come and visit.
Oh, okay, now I get it! This is just about tourism, not commerce.
We’re going to expand the number of countries where visitors can get pre-cleared by Homeland Security…
Hey, here’s a thought: how about American citizens who have to travel several times a week (because they’re one of the lucky ones who still has a job) get a pre-clearance by Homeland Security so they can bypass the TSA gendarmes?
And we’re going to speed up visa processing for countries with growing middle classes that can afford to visit America – countries like China and Brazil.
*sigh* Sadly, it appears as though we’re going to have to outsource our tourist industry too, since middle class Americans can no longer afford to vacation in America.
And we can’t wait to make it happen.
Too often over the last few months, we’ve seen Congress drag its feet and refuse to take steps we know will help strengthen our economy. That’s why this is the latest in a series of actions I’ve taken on my own to help our economy keep growing, creating jobs, and restoring security for middle-class families.
Well, this is just a tiny preview of what you’re in for. Be sure to tune in to Big Guy’s Big State of the Union speech Tuesday night for additional information and instructions.
We’ll be doing a few more dress rehearsals between now and then. Both of the speech, and what we’ll be wearing for the occasion.
We’ve already established the fact that we can WOW (win With Out Whites) so there’s really no need to pander to that segment of our base anymore. “The president’s re-election is at stake here,” he said. “There’s bigger fish to fry. There’s more at stake here than just a pipeline.”
Indeed, how many times do I have to point out that getting reelected is Job Won?