Wednesday, June 13, 2012

The Contexterator-in-Chief explains all the trouble in the world.

I see that Big Guy was busy giving autographs to his adoring fans yesterday while Lady M was busy raising money for the campaign…

bo baltimore fund raiser adulation

No wait! I’ve got that backwards. It was the other way around.

mo american grown

It’s really getting hard to keep their schedules straight, since they’re nearly identical these days.

So, while Big Guy was out drumming up support for WINNING and moving the hope ’n change FORWARD,

bo oh noRomney’s a vampire capitalist. Now repeat after me: ‘I hope he fails’

by blaming the stinkin’ economy on Bush for stickin’ him with the bill for that big old steak  and martini dinner:

bo hyatt regency baltimore Read my lips: George. W. Bush. Ate. Your. Lunch. Got it?

and pointing at Berlin as the source of all those headwinds from Europe for being selfish and not spreading their wealth around to all the other have-not countries, like Greece.

Bo points finger at berlinIt’s the Krauts’ fault, greedy vulture 1 percenters. Just like in WWII.

1019-Greece-Financial-Crisis-strike-unions_full_600Greece agrees: it’s Germany’s fault

Fortunately that gave everybody a reason to look the other way after cub-reporter and press secretary, Mr. Claire Shipman, stepped in it. After lecturing the press corpse on Monday for taking Big Guy’s comment on “the private sector doing just fine, thank you,” out of context, he proceeded to advise them that they weren’t doing their jobs correctly. And he should know, since he is Mr. Claire Shipman. I believe that Jay-Jay’s exact words were: “You all ought to do your jobs and report on context, of course.”    

Of course, heeding that advice would eliminate nearly all mainstream reporting, so I will assume he was being hyperbolic. Besides, bringing context to Big Guy’s statements on the economy requires math. And that’s something neither Big Guy nor his band of sycophants are very fond of or good at. tried to help out by explaining simply that the math proves that public sector jobs in the current environment are unsustainable. You would think that would be something Big Guy should understand because he’s been preaching about the power of sustainability since forever. Butt sure enough, they lost him and the rest of the big brains around here once they threw in the rocket science equation:

at-the-blackboardNo, really, it’s nowhere near that complicated.

Shrinking tax revenues MINUS increasing wages, benefits, pensions EQUALS deficits

And that’s before it gets really complicated: There’s even more rocket science behind the shrinking public pension funds  (just like your 401k!) due to the stock market collapse – despite the fact the private sector is doing fine. Then there’s the rocket science involved in the shrinking tax revenues available for paying public union wages, benefits and pensions, again, due to the fact that the private sector is doing just fine. No wait…that doesn’t make sense, does it? See how complicated this gets? No wonder the big brains are having such a hard time.

So let me make it perfectly clear:

pensionpigThere’s not enough money in the Public Unions Pension Piggy Bank.

And nobody is making enough money (in the private sector that’s doing just fine) to put any more in.

piggybank-e1300373062172Please feed me

Butt none of the pigs want to move away from the government trough.


Just like in Greece:



I dunno, butt I’m thinking that if I were David Axe-man Axelrod, I’d be questioning the wisdom of using the campaign’s favorite 2008 carryover optic anymore:

Screenshot Studio capture #504

Those columns don’t look quite as classic as they once did. At least I think it’s the columns.

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