Friday already, and there’s a lot of family news to catch up on that I didn’t get a chance to cover during the week.
First, let me be clear, if Big Guy had a half-brother in Kenya, he’d look just like George Obama.
…just an old sweet song keeps George-O on my mind
In fact he does - have a half-brother in Kenya that is. And it is George! And if you look closely you can even see the family resemblance.
Apparently George has fallen on hard times and his son (Big Guy’s nephew) needed surgery that George couldn’t afford. So he did what any father would do, he reached out to the only brother he knew that would help him: Dinesh D’Souza. I guess he tried to call Big Guy, butt he was unavailable, uninterested or just disinclined to pitch in.
Just like Hillary when BO called on her to help out.
Oh well, at least our negotiations with Hill landed us an endorsement and speech from Big Dawg at the convention.
Anyway, from half-brothers to mother-in-laws, we just couldn’t get away from family controversy this week. After Big BO’s slip up (placing Little Bo’s charm-potential ahead of Granny R’s) he immediately recovered and ingratiated himself back into her good graces:
“You know, I love my mother-in-law, too - that’s where Michelle got her looks from.”
Of course that landed him back in Lady M’s dog house, for obvious reasons:
So we quickly moved on to a much sweeter story: the “first kiss” as related to no other than the first Big O in Chicago - the Oprah herself. Commemorating the composite first kiss, a lovely plaque on a rock was placed at the site of the actual event:
And how sweet is this? It was at a Baskin Robbins – which explains the “tastes like chocolate” remark. Despite the fact that BO is half white, it wasn’t a racist comment after all, regardless of what Touré thinks about the use of racial coding to access “some really deep stereotypes.”
Butt enough about racial animosity in this historical post racial presidency. This marker will no doubt be just the first in a series of plaques about our historic presidency all across America.
The only problem with the new plaque of course is the inconvenient fact that it’s at a Baskin Robbins, which was one of those failing companies that those Vulture Capitalists at Bain Capital invested in, revived and sent about it’s new revitalized business. Bummer.
Although I see they did create a special ice cream to mark the “first composite kiss” :
Although this will NEVER replace the ever popular Barocky Road ice cream they created back in ‘09 to commemorate the inauguration:
And I guess as long as we’re talking about illegal pleasures, I should note for the record that Lady M tried to make up for all the backlash she got for scolding little Gabby for eating her Egg McMuffin. She temporarily hopped off the healthy eating chuck wagon and gave Big Guy the green light to enjoy his deep-fried Twinkie at the Iowa State Fair:
"Even though you say I don't let you eat them, you eat what you want."
And don’t even think about getting started with me!
After all, I didn’t build this dog eating thing into a controversy; somebody else did that.
Have a nice weekend.