Sunday, August 26, 2012

Todd Akin, Bunny Ranch Girls, Michelle…connect the dots

As is often the case, last week was so busy I didn’t have time to cover all the important news so today I’ll try to catch up.

I’ll start with the touchiest one: Todd Akin. While even his own party condemned his stupid comments and called for him to withdraw from the Senate race, a couple of awards for most creative criticism are in order. First runner up is Barbara Boxer for her creative appellation of “first wives and mommy-haters” to all pro-choice anti-women Republicans. Butt first prize is awarded to none other than MoDo, the NYT’s resident hysterical feminist and delicately balanced mind.

modo menUnfortunately for MoDo, two can play this game

Gosh, how long has it been since you last heard someone refer to a Republican as a “troglodyte” – even on the lefty blogs? Plus MoDo helps put everything in its proper perspective by quoting Dr. Paul Blumenthal, a professor of obstetrics and gynecology for the Stanford Program for International Reproductive Education and Services - not sure exactly what that is butt I bet it includes women’s reproductive rights (emphasis added):

“What is very disturbing to me is that people like Mr. Akin who have postulated this secret mechanism for avoiding pregnancy have developed their own make-believe world of science based on entirely self-serving beliefs of convenience or just ignorance,” he said. “I don’t think we want these people to be responsible for the lives of others.”

I know a lot of “troglodytes” who feel that way too: about Obamanomics, the religion of global warming, and any number of other self-serving liberal agendas.

obamas-work-is-done-here“I don’t think we want these people to be responsible for the lives of others.”

Next, you may have wondered why, on the very day the CBO came out with a warning that the country is teetering on a precipice above the 11th ring of fiscal hell (damn that do-nothing Congress!), Big Guy was off in Las Vegas (baby!) talking about teachers and education.

The answer to that one is easy. We need to ensure that we can continue to borrow enough money from China to hire more teachers to ensure that they continue to implement the proper propaganda education program of young American minds: Global Warming and ecology, new English (Spanglish), new history, and most of all new math. That curriculum will ensure that nobody is smart enough to even know what the CBO is talking about, let alone hold it against a Democrat. For added insurance, Big Guy’s new education program promises that there will be no math.

paulryanmathBig Guy’s most horrible nightmare

And although today officially ends Lady M’s week-long “Guest Editor” status, I would be remiss if I didn’t mention what an outstanding job she’s done at her audition over at iVillage!

mo-iVillage-editor_thumb6_thumbEven though she had to share space with Sex Tips from the Bunny Ranch Girls.

Today’s segment is all about healthy eating (again) this time with a focus on the Big White Organic Garden of Good and Evil.

“When I first arrived in Washington, I wasn’t even sure that we could plant a garden. I didn’t know whether we would be allowed to change the landscaping of the White House grounds, or whether the soil was fertile enough, or whether there would be enough sunlight. And I had hardly any gardening experience, so I didn’t even really know how to go about planting a garden in the first place,” the first lady writes in American Grown.

Butt neither she not Big Guy have ever been the type to let their ignorance stand in the way of getting “schtuff” done!

“But one thing I did know was that I wanted this garden to be more than just a plot of land growing vegetables on the White House lawn... I hoped this garden would help begin a conversation about the food we eat, the lives we lead, and how all of that affects our children.”

Honestly, how does she do it? Right in the middle of the campaign sacrifice tour, she finds time to do an interview every single day for this rag very popular site.

Earlier in the week MO explained how eating dinner together as a family was a top priority for her and Big Guy:

"Surprisingly, the best healthy habit is eating dinner together on a regular basis. I think we underestimate the importance of families sitting down around the table at a set time. And it’s hard for many families.

It was hard for us until we got to the White House, but we talk about this all the time. Barack can at least control that part of his schedule. He can stop whatever he is doing, come home at 6:30 p.m. We kind of structure our lives around mealtime."

Oh yes…Big Guy definitely processed that order. That’s why he had to leave BeBe and his staff in the lurch, and that’s why he had to leave his hosts holding the doggie bag at the Rhode Island Runner dinner they held in his honor. Family dinner hour takes precedence, even if your “guests” have paid $7500 to dine with the Preezy. And somebody’s got to “scoop the poop,” right?

Anyway, I think the iVillage interview format suits Lady M perfectly, don’t you?

mo iVillageiMO. uLess.

I’m thinking syndication, Spring of 2013. “The iMO Show: where we discuss America’s relevant issues; gardening, healthy eating and racism” If Oprah can do it, Big MO sure as heck can too. Did I mention that she has a sociology degree from Princeton, and a law degree from Harvard? Lady M, not Oprah.

Linked By: Larwyn’s Linx on Doug Ross@Journal, and AnnieLaurie76 on twitter, and BlogsLucianneLoves, and NOBO2012 on Free Republic, Thanks!