Saturday, November 2, 2013

Sex, lies and – if you insist – let’s go to the videotape

After a month of criticism of our Obamacare Website - so full of “glitches” that we can still count on one hand the number of legit enrollees -

number one now in 4 colorsWe’re #1 – now in 4 different colors!

we’re adopting a whole new approach.

new yourker mocks obamacare websiteBecause apparently the old one didn’t work right

Here are the primary tactics of our new strategy:

#1: Blame the Republicans. This one nearly always works; this time they are culpable because everyone knows they’ve been trying to sabotage Obamacare from the start. And they’re racists.

#2: Blame the greedy, heartless insurance companies. They’re rotten apples. That’s why we need to get rid of them altogether. And go to a single-payer system.

#3: Advise people that the cancellation notices from their insurance companies are a feature of the Affordable Care Act, not a bug. (see “rotten apples,” above)

#4  If all else fails, employ the Clinton Nuclear defense: “Everybody lies about keeping your healthcare plan.”

Screenshot Studio capture #1453…and healthcare

In case you haven’t figured it out, this new approach is intended to shift the focus away from “OBAMACARE ISN’T WORKING.”  Hey, there’s no need to shout, you’ve got our attention!

I don’t know which phony scandal we can refocus on though:

So many phony scandals to choose from, it’s hard to know which one we can use as a squirrel. Maybe “Fast and Furious.” There’s nothing new being discussed in that phony scandal right now, is there?

Perhaps we need a new squirrel of an entirely different stripe.

black and white squirrel

Butt sometimes those new squirrels end up looking more like skunks.

striped_skunk_and_squirrel_42-17339130eeeuuuu!

Besides, we’ve already got a black and white squirrel around here that stinks a lot.

boseering eyes All skunks worthy of their stripes have developed a deadly stink-eye.

So maybe we’ve reached the point where we need to employ another trick from the trusty progressive playbook; time to “reframe the problem” altogether. Obamacare: it’s so big, so awesome and so grand that no one man, no one woman and no one existing Government Department of Health and Human Services could ever possibly oversee its implementation. We need to form a brand new agency with 10 more levels of oversight and review to ensure it’s successful operation.

Obamacare-Chartpjm-7-28-10Because the first 200 levels aren’t enough

So here’s the deal: this mess is clearly not Barry’s fault. He made it perfectly clear from the gitgo: If HE likes your healthcare plan, you can KEEP your healthcare plan. Period. And I’ve got this fresh new videotape that proves it.

So ask yourself: just whose fault is it that the do-nothing Congress passed a law that they gave to a do-everything-incompetently bureaucracy, led by a know-nothing President?

That’s a rhetorical question, so if you insist on responding, please remember to do so in the  form of a question.

Linked By: Larwyn’s Linx on Doug Ross@Journal, and Abby L Call, Mireille Buser on facebook, and BlogsLucianneLoves, and NOBO2012 on Free Republic, Thanks!

Cross-Posted on Patriot Action Network