If you’re done wrapping presents and baking cookies, and find yourself looking to kill some time - and who isn’t this time of year -
As you know, we left for our Winter Holiday vacay on the alleged isle of our birth much earlier than usual, and I didn’t get my shopping done. I was certain that Big Guy would stay in D.C. to make sure Healthcare.gov was working before we left, butt I guess I mis-misunderstood his priorities. And now that we’re here, I find out that Lady M borrowed my debit card to do some on-line shopping at Target for Big White staff gifts before we left, and now my bank has put a hold on it.
So the Crayola Story Studio was just what I needed! I’m making Big Guy and Lady M a special coloring book called It’s A WONderful Life, highlighting and commemorating the important, historic events during their reign. I’m HOPEing that Harvey Weinstein will buy my book, make it into a movie and enter it in the 2016 Sundance Film Festival. Because seriously, it's got WINNING! written all over it - in fact, that’s it’s alternate title.
You can make your own coloring book story about the reign of the WONs too; or you can just download and color the one I made. If you make your own, please remember to share it with us. Maybe I’ll add it to my story book and you can cash in on the movie residuals!
Here are a few pages from my historic coloring book, It’s A WONderful Life:
Since I’m looking to attract Hollywood’s attention, my first page commemorates Lady M’s Nickelodeon space-age glittery “Metallica” frock:
Next, Lady M steals the Academy Awards via satellite in another metallic space frock. Here she is handing out the “Best Movie of the Year” award:
As you can see in my coloring book adaptation, we implemented a few special effects for this appearance.
And here’s a page commemorating Big Guy’s first, historic, campaign platform from his first, historic campaign for Prezzy:
Next, my page commemorating Big Guy’s first, historic Nobel Prize:
And finally, what story of the historic events of the Won’s Regime would be complete without a salute to Obamacare:
Well, I’ve gotta’ run out and buy Lady M a box of crayons. I think I’ll go totus porkus (whole hog) and get her the 152 count Ultimate Tub featuring 120 "regular" colors, 16 "Scintilliants" and 16 "metallic" crayons.
She’s gonna’ need the Scintilliants and metallics for most of my featured frocks! And I’m pleased to report that the Ultimate Collection now includes (by law) the new “Multicultural Flesh Tones” set:
If I have any money left over I’m going to get her the glitter and molten metal collections as well; they just scream “Lady M,” Right?
So, I’m waving my copyright on “It’s a WONderful Life: the Coloring Book” just for the next few days, so for a limited time you can download the pages from my coloring book for free and color these pages, or let the kids/grandkids color them while you’re making those cute little Penguin Ho Hos.
Just remember a few basic coloring rules: if you are a conservative or a Republican, make sure you stay inside the lines. If you are a liberal, make sure you use every color at least once; if you’re a Democrat be sure to share your crayons with others who don’t have as many as you do, and if you are a Moderate, well, don’t bother coloring it all; just sit back and critique the work submitted by everyone else.
Cross-Posted on Patriot Action Network