Wednesday, July 2, 2014

Soccer ‘R Not Us

I know - it seems like it’s been going on forever! And still two weeks to go. It’s not the World Cup itself, it’s the Google Doodles. How many more of these stupid multicultural soccer gifs on its header (hee, hee) do we have to endure? 48 so far, and counting:


Yeah, Team USA lost to the chocolate people - and no, that’s not racist, it’s just who they are:

Sure, it would have been nice to win something for a change, as we’ve been on a losing streak for a while now. First we were handed a bitter loss when the 2011 World Cup games were stolen from us by Quatar while we were still stinging from our loss of the 2016 Olympic Games to Brazil (now that was racist). And that’s why Brazil is the the only nation south of our former border that we are allowed to officially hate.

So, with our loss to Belgium we’re out of the World Cup playoffs; yawn. Everybody around here is more concerned about our 13 game, 9 to zip losing streak against the Supreme Court. This has made our relentless march to nullify the Constitutional limits on Big Guy’s powers somewhat of an uphill battle. Even Monday’s narrow 5 to 4 loss at the hand of the Supremes has some people spooked (not in a racist way), mumbling things like “if we can’t implement our plan to end the Republicans’ War on Women® what can we implement?”  I’ve even heard some whispers of “What next? The Senate?”

So I’m going to go out on a limb and predict that basketball and football are still safe around here, even in the age of Obama. Because Bo’s always found b-ball more compelling than soccer:

bo basketball

And we still really like spiking the football:

bo football

Although our Secretary of State clearly favors soccer, as he should:

kerry_drop_footballJean Carré, reporting for duty


POSTSCRIPT:  A bit late for Canada Day, butt fun anyway -

h/t to my Bro, eh?

Linked By: @Standlow, @ValCSilver, @dchrist81 on twitter, and BlogsLucianneLoves, and Free Republic, Thanks!

Cross-Posted on Patriot Action Network