“WHO'S THAT GIRL”

Whoa! Dude. We know MO started that whole “toned arms” trend, but seriously, Madge, have some fries with that macrobiotic tofu.

I’ve seen frog legs with more meat on them.

I know you’re not FLOTUS, but you’ve got more money than the entire Chicago Machine. You could afford a whole house full of trans, hyper and quantum imaging mirrors(call me if you need a referral). They could make you look Vanity Fair ready on a moments notice - even if your derriere was the size of the Capital dome.

I just knew that Kabbalah thing wasn’t going to turn out well. Although, I guess it’s better than Scientology.