This morning marked the official kick off of the O’s War on Twinkies, aka “Let’s Move”.
So here’s the O’s command and control plan for battling kiddie-porn fat: eat healthier( as determined by companies who supply food and cafeteria services to school lunch programs across the country and who,incidentally, have been big contributors to the Won’s campaign coffers) be more active (through government funded pre,post and during school programs) and get healthier (that part’s just an edict – because we won – and we’re worried about healthcare costs ).
The whole gang got together this morning to watch Big Guy ink the Presidential Memorandum creating the first ever Task Force on Childhood Obesity. EVERYONE is involved, which is how you can tell it’s
really big money important: the DPC, Office of the First Lady, Interior, USDA, HHS, Education, NEC and other agencies, as necessary. But look, here’s what’s cute:
Look closely: they are all color coordinated! Blue tie, blue tie, blue tie, blue dress and – ah – sweater, blue tie. Kitty seemed to be the only one who didn’t get the memo, or maybe she felt that her hair was close enough. I’m not sure what it means, but after the purple coordinated SOTU, I believe I’ve spotted a trend. Not as big as pole-dancer boots, but definitely a trend. Anyway, that explains why Andy Stern wasn’t present at the signing – he only has purple ties.
So the Task Force on Childhood Obesity will be conducting a review of every single program and policy relating to child nutrition and physical activity (there are thousands and thousands, as you might imagine) and develop a national action plan that “maximizes federal resources.” I’m not sure exactly what that means, but I’m pretty sure the deficit hawks aren’t going to like it. We have to get that review done in 90 days or less, so we have plenty of time left in our historic administration to award big contracts to loyal supporters who can
benefit contribute to the effort. And remember: it’s all about the children. Because they’re too fat.
We are going to be very busy. So LET’S MOVE!
Somehow I think a lot of people would like to do just that, if they had any idea where they could go.