Monday, October 24, 2011

The Great Apple Exposé: And I’m Not Talking About Steve Jobs

So - guess who got married last weekend?  Deputy Campaign Manager, Obama 2012, Julianna “Smooty” Smoot, that’s who. And guess who wasn’t invited? That’s right - “Obama 2012” and his lovely wife – that’s who.

The wedding was held in Northport, Michigan, a small village on the tip of the Leelanau Peninsula, overlooking Grand Traverse Bay on Lake Michigan:

northportgifNorthport: it’s a long way from Occupy Chicago where Smooty is working on Big Guy’s reinstatement program

Dewey from Detroit assures me that the tiny village of Northport is quite lovely any time of year, butt especially in autumn. I like it there because there are so many places that just naturally reflect the surroundings - something a mirror finds comforting.

Screenshot Studio capture #308Big trees reflected at Northport’s marina

from the gt lighthouseThe Fresnel lens at Northport’s Grand Traverse Lighthouse reflects the sun

northport2 Grand Traverse Bay reflects the sky,


…and the sky reflects the wind

grand traverse bay at the light house

northport sunrise …and both the bay and the sky reflect the sunrise

storms brewin in northportAnd these skies over downtown Northport reflect a gathering storm on the horizon: it’s blowing in from Chicago again

Much to reflect on there. Anyway, I heard the wedding was lovely, even though it looks to me like Smooty robbed the cradle:

smooty and lom 44 and 40

Not only that, butt I understand that her new husband, Lon, is a…are you ready? A venture CAPITALIST! I would like to go on record right now predicting that this one will never last.

Oh well, at least they had a nice fall honeymoon in lovely northern Michigan – a place no one will be interested in “occupying” until next summer now.

deer winterExcept the deer

Butt enough romance; I better get back to my day job. A few Lady M news items to catch up on in case you missed them: Here is MO’s historic first tweet:

Screenshot Studio capture #306Wow! Look! You type letters in and they magically appear on this screen! With a little tweetie bird!

Screenshot Studio capture #310

Which was accompanied by her first ever “twinkles” message as well:

Screenshot Studio capture #307Princeton grad, Harvard Law grad, former practicing lawyer, former highly paid (1%?) executive and now, proud twinkler.

Also, do you remember those lovely apples that graced the tables at the State Dinner for the South Korean President and his Mrs.?

state so ko dinner decorations fake and made in china

Well here’s something you might not have been able to guess: they were all FAKE! I know. I can’t believe it either! Apparently they were all re-purposed for another one of Lady M’s photo ops last week: a party for school cafeteria professionals (aka lunch ladies, butt now represented by a union) nutrition directors and school principals (representing the NEA) on the South Lawn.

Check out some of the nutrition directors,below, checking out the giant “apple.” They were encouraged to “put notes on top of the giant apple, with creative ideas for boosting the health environment at schools.” 

a fake apple a dayDon’t be tricked: this giant “idea apple” is all phony. And don’t forget about what happened to Adam and Eve. Am I allowed to say that?

Boy, I can’t tell you how disillusioned I am over this whole apple thing. I mean APPLES! As in “AS AMERICAN AS APPLE PIE” apples. If our Apples are FAKE, what exactly does that imply, anyway? I shudder to think.

And I’d like to launch an investigation to find out exactly where those fake apples came from. I’m guessing China.

And now I’m beginning to question all those “farm”-to-table events we’ve been holding for the past 3 years too. And all those photo ops in the “produce” section at Walmart. Has this entire historical 3 years just been some sort of an elaborate scam?

sham wow bo 2

I wish I could just retire to northern Michigan right now. Where all of the reflections can be taken at face value, and where, I understand, they grow some of the best apples in the country. Right there. In real orchards. Real apples.

mi apples4


Hey! How about if Big Guy uses Lady M’s “Idea Apple” and invites all the POWS to the Big White to submit their ideas for how to solve our economic problems? Because I’m sure they’ve got a bazillion brilliant ideas. And at least that would give Mayor Bloomberg a chance to hose down Zoo-cotti Park before the peak of the Swine Flu season.

Linked By: Larwyn’s Linx on Doug Ross@Journal, and Attercliff on, and Blonde on NewsBusters, Thanks!