Thursday, December 22, 2011

Big Guy Goes Shopping with the Dog and Bags Himself an Elephant

Yesterday was another jam packed day full of activity for Big Guy, even though he’s supposed to be on vacation in the alleged state of his birth. Yet he’s still managed to help you with your gift buying by selecting some always popular books – all available on Amazon – for everyone on your gift list.

We’ve temporarily suspended our war on Christmas in order to redirect the artillery to the even more popular class war.(Class Warfare, available on Amazon, $17.97)


In fact, we’ll actually be invoking the spirit of Christmas as a foil in the class war.  “How dare the heartless Republicans go home for Christmas without passing the payroll tax reduction bill? They don’t care about your babies!” 

See how that works? In truth, nobody can understand why they won’t just pass the damn bill now! Butt I don’t know why Big Guy doesn’t just do what all lesser bosses do when faced with a crisis on the job: summon all the worker-bees back to work to get the job done.

We’re executing our “Leading from Behind” strategy

I guess he doesn’t want to mess up Congress’ unspecified holiday plans. Nor does he want to let this opportunity to blame the heartless R-words go to waste. After all they’re taking food out of the mouths of children suffering from obesity.

And good news! You too can become a foot soldier in the class war! Join our gang of tweeters in the war room by telling us what extra hardship you’ll endure by losing that extra $40 from your paycheck for 2 months! 

Of course you must be employed and actually getting a paycheck in order to play. Not so with our fun lottery to win a dinner with Big Guy and a Lady M: 

this could be youSpace is Limited: so contribute now!

I even got an email from Reggie inviting me to take part in this special promotion. Really – Reggie of all people! I think he’s going to follow in Debbie Wasserman Schultz’ footsteps and get his advanced degree in Political Campaigning, aka, fundraising:


So, after thanking the House Republicans for the swell holiday present that they handed him on a silver platter:

quote-page-2This Is Not A Game (available for $3.97 on Amazon)

Big Guy called the press and went on an impromptu shopping trip, continuing his recommendations for books your friends and relatives may enjoy.

boboBobos in Paradise: The New Upper Class and How They Got There. Only $10.87.

Bo shops for some treats with Little Bo at Petsmart it’s always nice to have a few bones to gnaw on – it’s a nice bonding exercise:

x610The Lovely Bones. $10.19

Then we bagged some good buys at Best Buy:

bo bagmanThe Man with the Red Bag: $6.40 Amazon Prime

And BO actually used his own credit card to buy some Wii games (!):

bo at best buyBig Change at Best Buy: Working Through Hypergrowth to Sustained Excellence (an excellent buy at just $4.00 – if it works)

Then he picked up some thin-crust specialty pizzas at Del Ray’s (don’t tell Lady M) to pick up 3 pizzas to go: one large (14") thin crust "Supreme Clientele" pizza, which has red sauce, mozzarella, pepperoni, sausage, peppers, red onions, olives, and mushrooms, and sells for $19. Big Guy’s other two pizzas were special orders: A 14" thin crust pepperoni and sausage pie, and a 14" thin crust pie with green peppers and red onions. Each was $20. He paid with cash that someone just happened to have handy.

del ray pizza boManagement and Feeding of Sheep: $31.45 Amazon Prime


bo stranger in a strange landPie in the Sky: the Authorized History of Punkin Chunkin' : $20.  Amazon Prime

and returned to the Big White to continue to wage war on for the American people.

broadway boundHerding Cats: Teaching and Leading in a Postmodern World: $12.95 Amazon Prime

Just another day in the life of Big Guy: Saving the world from democracy while helping you, the little people, with your unspecified Winter Holiday shopping. It’s OK, you can say “thanks” at the polls next November.

PS: Chickaboomer is all over this story too: Obama Pulls A Boner