It’s New Year’s Eve (or “NYE” as the media has recently decided to abbreviate it now that everybody texts everything) and MOTUS is saving herself for the stroke of midnight.
So in the spirit of our lazy legislators and deliberately remiss journolists I’m doing my “best of 2012” - half today, and half tomorrow! I’m not sure if that’s a two-fer or a four-fer, butt it’s definitely a replay.
So please enjoy these memories from the vaults of MOTUS as the clock strikes midnight and we all turn into pumpkins, thanks to our do-nothing Congress.
(God bless their little hearts; someday we’ll all come to the realization that we’d be better off if they NEVER did anything.)
So let’s tackle this past year from the top:
January: Bitch Stole My Look!®
In which we witness the Oscar contenders emulating Lady M’s fashion forwardness.
February: Karl Loves the Wons
In which Karl Lagerfeld endorses Big Guy and Lady M’s reelection since, as he so diplomatically put it, “… I want Mr. Obama who I think is very okay— because there is nothing better anyway — [to be re-elected], especially because of her."
In which we join Lady M for the annual Rites of Spring in her Garden of Good and Evil where she plants the seeds of future revolution.
In which we discover that nobody actually read Big Guy’s first authorized autobiography.
May: Hitler Discovers Obama Stole His Theme Song. ‘Nuf said.
In which the Molsterman first appears and reports on the round-the-clock shredding going on at Fast and Furious ground zero: the DOJ.
To be continued…
Oh, and if you plan on celebrating our new pumpkin status tonight…let’s be careful out there. You don’t want to wake up feeling like you ate a bale of cotton.