Monday, November 30, 2009

Turkeys, Trees and Tarts. Oh My.

Good Grief! I leave for a few short days and all hell breaks loose around here.

First, I hear Big Guy’s pardoning some turkey, but thank God it wasn’t KSM. Just some gobbler on it’s way to Disney World.courage I hope old “Courage,” as Big Guy named him, hasn’t heard about what happened to his brother up here in D.C. while he was enjoying the Thanksgiving Day parade in sunny Florida.

I understand the whole fam went to the homeless shelter to donate 2 more turkeys that hadn’t been pardoned and dump off the rest of the vegetables from the organic garden that they couldn’t pawn off on anyone at the state semi-vegetarian dinner.

o's at homeless

The O’s then spent a quiet Thanksgiving in the WH, enjoying the usual fare: the aforementioned turkey (may he rest in peace), oyster stuffing (this should not be served if there are young children present), mac and cheese (more appropriate), taters two ways, greens (I thought they got rid of them at the homeless shelter?) and six (!)  kind of pies. I guess we won’t be wearing that Naeem Khan gown again any time soon, with or without the Spanx bodysuit.

Then there was the excitement over the arrival of the Christmas-Holiday Tree for the White House. Here’s Lady M with Santa, and it looks like she’s wearing one of his belts.


I’m gone a few hours and we’ve already forgotten the difference between fuchsia and scarlet?BIG RED BELT

By the way, I hear that religious ornaments have not been banned from the official White House Christmas-Holiday tree after all. It was just a big mix-up. I found a couple of boxes of these laying around the Blue Room, and as you can see they’re very festive and should look very nice on our tree.


And when I left town last Wednesday, I thought everything had gone swimmingly at the first official State Dinner at the Big White. Then I find out we had intruders. How rude!

I suppose the Secret Service is going to take the hit for this, but frankly, if anyone around here would just read the protocol guidelines and their job descriptions, they’d see that the Social Secretary has the final call on guests admitted to State Dinners. But Desiree Rogers, in her Comme de Garcon runway nightmare was a little too busy hob-nobbing to pay attention to her official job responsibilities, (which include finalizing the guest list) and the Barbie-doll-in-waiting slips right in.

sd desiree


Seriously, I could have made Desiree something out of a couple of old potato sacks that would have looked better. Can we say “fashion victim”? At least take the apron off.







So we get these two low-life media whores slipping into the tent without so much as an invitation.  Normally I would have said that the sari costume was a dead give away that they didn’t belong. Unfortunately, it appears that liberals think that wearing the clothes native to the country of the honored guest is somehow a deferential and respective gesture. Honestly, I wish someone would read the protocol manual!

what liberals wear to statewhat liberals wear2

Dr. Sanjay Gupta and wife Rebecca Olsen, and the rude Tareq and Michaele Salahi. Apparently they don’t know the difference between fuchsia and scarlet either.


  state indra nooyi


Indra Nooyi, CEO PepsiCo, NOT wearing a sari. Even though she, being Indian born, could if she so chose.






state dinner imposters

Whoops! This is never supposed to happen. The stringy blonde hair, I mean. 



Like I said, the SS is going to take the fall for this, but just between you and me, there might be someone around here that loves to be the big shot and invite people to things he really isn’t authorized to. 

statecrashers eahm If I keep my mouth shot, maybe I’ll get box tickets again for the ballet this season.


PS Thanks everyone, for the comments while I was gone. It will take me awhile to catch up on my correspondence.