Rather than stand by her man as he stood by that little French wench Carla, Lady M decided to fly back to Washington to spend more time with the family.
So she “kissed” Big Guy goodbye and climbed aboard that big ol' jet airliner to be carried home, where adulation is not only expected, it’s guaranteed.
So with Lady M winging her way back to America, Big Guy was left to his own devices (with Reggie’s help, of course) to work out the world’s problems with the other G8 leaders in the swanky French seaside resort of Deauville.
And they’re not just having fun: they’re saving the world. Of course in order to do that, they’ll need a LOT more money. And to show his chops in that department, Big Guy came up with a plan to address the fiscal crisis: because who else can bring the WTF factor to Europe? He’s pursuing a time honored plan to bring in gobs of cash: that’s right – a new world tour!
He’s getting the band back together,to Win the Future:
As usual it’s up to Big Guy, the pied piper and leader of the band, to make it all happen. Watch the finesse as he rounds up the usual suspects:
Good, here’s Nicholas!
Hey! There’s some more of them over there: Hey! Guys!
Dmitri, you go that way, Nicky, come with me…
Now stick close behind me…
Still with me?
Where the hell’s Angie? We need a broad.
OK then. She’s so short I didn’t see her there next to you Nicky.
Just ignore the
protestors fans and keep following me. We’ve got a little studio work to do before our next live performance.
Ok, I know this first gig isn’t what we were all hoping for, but consider it the out-of-town warm up for our triumphant return to the bright lights on Broadway!
It looks like some of us still need to do a little work before we’re back on top. Silvio, Angie, you need to hit the gym. And the salad bar. Nicky, Davey: brush up on the melody lines, maybe update a few of the lyrics to reflect current events. I’ll work on the dance steps. And we need to make a pact: when talking to the media, we’re simply not going to discuss old disputes that resulted in all the riffs, bad feelings and the breakup of the band in the first place.
So, if the press brings up any of the following issues - the world economy being in the dumpster, the bloody Middle East revolutions now moving into months, not days, the likelihood of terrorist nations getting nuclear weapons, Israel being on the brink of annihilation at the hands of Islamafascists - just respond by blaming global forces out of our control.
And if that doesn’t work, just blame Bush and switch the talking points to how we are currently planning on covering a bunch of new, hot hits on our world tour. For example, World-wide Internet Regulation. That should have them willing to shovel out the big bucks again.
And don’t worry guys: What could go wrong?
After all, we’re on a mission from God. Or Allah. Whatever.