Saturday, April 7, 2012

Heating up our voting blocks: Jews, Girls, Greenies and more.

*Sigh* Some people will complain about anything:

p040612ps-0344smallrezBig Guy’s Seder Dinner last night

“One of the most disturbing aspects of modern American Jewish life is the almost obsessive desire of many Jews to universalize every aspect of Jewish belief while downplaying the original meanings of customs and ritual. Leftist Rabbi Arthur Waskow help set this in motion decades ago with his “Freedom Seder” in which he hijacked the Haggadah recited by Jews on Passover to promote other causes. Since then, transposing the seder in order to morph the Jewish holiday that celebrates the freedom of the Jewish people into something that has nothing to do with the Jews and Judaism has become so commonplace it is something of a cliché.”

As if Big Guy would use his Passover message to politicize anything. Just because we’re in the middle of the most important reelection campaign in the history of the world:

The story of the Exodus is thousands of years old, but it remains as relevant as ever. Throughout our history, there are those who have targeted the Jewish people for harm - a fact we were so painfully reminded of just a few weeks ago in Toulouse. Just as throughout history, there have been those who have sought to oppress others because of their faith, ethnicity or color of their skin…

There was no mention of the son Big Guy never had, butt he was clearly on his mind:

Once we have passed from bondage to liberty, how do we make the most of all that God has given us? This question may never be resolved, but throughout the years, the search for answers has deepened the Jewish people's commitment to repairing the world, and inspired American Jews to help make our union more perfect. And the story of that first Exodus has also inspired those who are not Jewish with common hopes, and a common sense of obligation.

Ed Schapiro tells us to get out our de-coder rings for this one:

The key phrase here is “make our union more perfect.” Obama typically uses that phrase when discussing racial divisions in America. His famous race speech in 2008 in which he threw Jeremiah Wright under the bus, for example, was titled,A More Perfect Union.”

Butt I wouldn’t get too excited about Big Guy “politicizing” Passover. It’s not as if the Jews have been singled out as an “interest group” that he’s courting for reelection. Anymore than women were being targeted yesterday at Big Guy’s Big White Forum on Women and the Economy.

bo-the-oceans-will-recede_thumb1“Vote for me and the oceans will recede, your contraceptives will be paid for and dry cleaners will no longer be allowed to charge more for blouses than men’s shirts.”

No. It’s just that our historical, most ecumenical president ever, celebrates the holidays of all religions of the world, in HOPE of picking up a few more votes along the way. It’s really non-partisan. See for yourself:

 Past Passovers:

bo seder 2011Could I get a little bacon in my matzo ball soup?


bo mo hanukkah

 Ramadan, of course; here, here and here:

bo iftar

Christmas:President Barack Obama and First Lady Michelle Obama pose for a formal portrait in front of the official White House Christmas Tree in the Blue Room of the White House, Dec. 6, 2009. (Official White House Photo by Lawrence Jackson)

This official White House photograph is being made available only for publication by news organizations and/or for personal use printing by the subject(s) of the photograph. The photograph may not be manipulated in any way and may not be used in commercial or political materials, advertisements, emails, products, promotions that in any way suggests approval or endorsement of the President, the First Family, or the White House. 
Our First Big White Christmas


“Michelle and I extend our warmest thoughts and wishes to all those who are celebrating Kwanzaa this holiday season. Today is the first of a joyful seven-day celebration of African-American culture and heritage. The seven principles of Kwanzaa — Unity, Self-Determination, Collective Work and Responsibility, Cooperative Economics, Purpose, Creativity and Faith — are some of the very values that make us Americans.”

That part about “collective work and responsibility” – not really all that American though. Unless you’re a member of the Symbionese Liberation Army.


The SLS should not to be confused with the New Black Panther Party,


also an offshoot of the original Black Liberation Army, butt whose holidays we don’t officially celebrate.


bunny hop

which we’ve celebrated every year we’ve been here. (Although there was that one year when things didn’t go so well. Warning: very scary.)

Spring Roll Run-through: with Peeps

Diwali (Hindu/Sikh Festival of lights),


…once even traveling all the way to India with Lady M to celebrate the Festival of Lights with the a group of local dancers:

uh uh wrinkle alert

Festivus (the Festival of Grievances and Feats of Strength):

mo mean madnob hill fundraiser

We’ve pretty much been airing our grievances and flexing our muscles since we got here.

Thermo (high holy day of the religion of Thermology*)

dufus and gufus

*Thermology. A godless religion that worships environmentalism and rails against the satanic forces of industry and capitalism. The religion is based on the(unsubstantiated) belief that earth achieved its ideal temperature in 1906 and has been rising,to our detriment, ever since. Adherents of the religion are required to accept this basic premise on faith and do whatever is necessary to reduce Earth’s fever so as to return it to the pristine state of the Belle Époque. Once that ideal state has been attained, it is mankind’s responsibility to maintain earth’s perfect temperature in perpetuity. 

The Church of Thermology (aka the Church of Immaculate Deception) requires its members to participate in cleansing and purification rituals that include the rejection of the evil  element carbon, while simultaneously embracing Whole Foods, Priuses and South American dictators.


So tomorrow, in another show of ecumenism, the Wons are off to the Christian church of their choice (TBD) to celebrate the Resurrection of Global Warming. Even though it looked as though it was all a big hoax, it has mysteriously risen from the dead.

Just a point of clarification: no one in the Administration practices and/or celebrates any aspect of the Voodoo religion.