MOTUS A.D.: Happy Father’s Day!

Sunday, June 16, 2013

Happy Father’s Day!

May I be the first to wish Kanye West Happy Father’s Day? His current squeeze, the lovely Kim Kardashian,

just gave birth to a baby girl yesterday.

So he’s technically got the “dad” box checked, and as soon as his lovely baby-mama, Kimmy, gets her youthful figure back,

they’re going to throw themselves a big party and pretend they’re getting married “forever.” Again, in Kim’s case.

Maybe wedding #3 will be the magical one

I know, I know – Kimmy’s mom said they’ll have a “private wedding” and you think that means “small,” and “private.” We’re talking “Kimye” here: everything is relative. I mean, she spent $15 million on wedding #2 that lasted exactly 2 New York minutes. “Small” doesn’t mean what you think it means to these people. It’s just like in politics.

“Obamacare will reduce everyone’s healthcare premiums by $2500/yr, cover an additional 11 million people and provide better care for all. And if you don’t believe me, you’re an idiot. And a racist.

Anyway the lovely Kim and her baby-daddy had a little girl. Lucky little lady; she’s got a couple of classy parents who know how to capitalize on their considerable talents.

Baby-Mama & Baby-Daddy

A Daddy who knows how to grab the spotlight:

Grabbing the mic and Grammy from Taylor Swift in order to give it to someone Kanye thinks is more deserving. Again, just like in politics.

“So we gave your tax dollars to the green energy companies we picked to win. And we did better than Wall Street!”

And the new baby will have the most famous-for-being-famous mommy, evah!

Add famous-for-being-pregnant to the list of Kimmy’s talents.

In case Kim’s primary talent has slipped your mind, maybe this will tweak your memory:

Butt back to Father’s Day: how important is a father in a child’s life you ask? Big Guy tells us in his weekly address:

… I still wish I had a dad who was not only around, but involved; another role model to teach me what my mom did her best to instill – values like hard work and integrity; responsibility and delayed gratification – all the things that give a child the foundation to envision a brighter future for themselves.

Apparently Mom did okay in the envisioning a brighter future part, butt apparently it really does take a father to actually instill those values of “hard work and integrity; responsibility and delayed gratification.”

Big Guy even admits as much:

That’s why I try every day to be for Michelle and my girls what my father was not for my mother and me.

Then, because Big Guy has fundamentally changed America, and American family life, he went on to give a shout-out to all kinds of dads - birth-dads, sperm-donor dads, second-daddy dads, and dads-who-used-to-be-moms dads:

Being a good parent – whether you’re gay or straight; a foster parent or a grandparent – isn’t easy. It demands your constant attention, frequent sacrifice, and a healthy dose of patience. And nobody’s perfect. To this day, I’m still figuring out how to be a better husband to my wife and father to my kids.

Let’s hope Big Guy figures out that husband-father thing pretty soon so he can concentrate on learning to be Commander-in-Chief. Because things seem to be heating up all over the world, and I’m not talking about global warming.

And I want to do what I can as President to encourage marriage and strong families.

So far, so good

We should reform our child support laws to get more men working and engaged with their children.

Some jobs might help

I’m working on that, ladies.

“And I will not rest until every American who wants a job has one.”