Another sparkling performance in black

Did you see the most recent sparkling performance in black?

Yes, Lady M looked wonderful at the Congressional Black Caucus Awards Dinner last night. Butt that’s not what I’m talking about.

I’m talking about the stunning performance of the other black man running for president: Herman Cain! Hey dude! Don’t you know that the Dems own the downtrodden-black-man-in-America motif? OK, technically that would be the downtrodden black man who’s been discriminated against at every turn, always gets the short end of the stick and never gets a shot at the corner office motif. And as the son of a house cleaner mother and a janitor/chauffer father, Herman normally would have qualified. Butt he gave up his membership when he got his BA in math and MS degree in computer science and went on to serve as CEO of Godfathers Pizza and Chairman of the Kansas City Federal Reserve Bank. He’s now clearly a member of the lucky, privileged, wealthy class who can afford to pay a little bit more.

Butt still, our party owns the one-black-man-three-votes-to-make-it-fair meme. And Herman is screwing it all up.

In an upset of stunning proportions, Cain walked away with a victory in Saturday’s Florida straw poll, polling more than Perry and Romney combined!!!! Wow! What kind of sick twisted mind games are those racist Tea Partiers playing with us now? And who is this Herman Cain who doesn’t know which side his bread is supposed to be buttered on? This is definitely not in the play book. So we’ll play it down and move on to something of more substance for our cause:  Lady M and Big Guy - last night - at the annual Congressional Black Caucus awards dinner.

Here’s our now-famous air kiss:

and our fabulously popular puddling hemline:

our famous “skirt hike” to deal with the puddling hem:

and of course our signature bangle collection, nicely done here in ebony and white diamonds:

Unfortunately, the above shot snuck through the side-view photo embargo, displaying the limits of containment systems and corset belts. BTW, if you’re wondering about the little loopy thing behind Lady M, it’s just your standard black tie corset tie.

          

The other loopy thing behind her is, of course, Big Guy:

So, no more booty shots, OK? Let’s focus on our positives:

Oooow! Look at that tiny waist! And Lady M’s is looking pretty sucked in too.

You can see it better on the golf course, where Big Guy shows Big Dawg a few tricks while competing in a contest of the incredible shrinking presidents:

You’ve probably never thought of this Bill, butt try using the other end on the green.

 

Just putt it in the hole, Bill

That’s all I have time for now, more tomorrow.

NOTE: this dispatch has been posted from the road, somewhere in the middle of Ann Barnhart territory in Colorado. I might even have seen some of her cattle.

Linked By: centralcal on JustOneMinute, Thanks!

Race to the Top: I Thought We Were Supposed To Be Post-Racial?

I think Big Guy just checked another item off his to do list: seizure of the  government/education propaganda machine, aka Race to the Top. And guess what? Because Congress has been dragging their feet on it for months, he decided to do it himself! Without their help. Because who needs legislators when you are the Won and only?

So, there you have it: a brand new No Child’s Fat Behind program! What? Oh, never mind. I got that mixed up with Lady M’s seizure of the government/union nutrition and childcare program.

Big Guy’s is a redo of the No Child Left Behind – I always did get those two confused. Here’s what he announced at the Big White yesterday:

“Congress hasn’t been able to do it, so I will. Mr. Obama said in a speech at the White House. Starting today, we’ll be giving states more flexibility to meet high standards.”

Two points:

First, some of the R-words are complaining that Big Guy overstepped his bounds by essentially dictating new terms for the states to follow in order to get their federal funding without benefit of the duly elected officials whose job it is to legislate such terms and conditions. Butt that’s just silly. Big Guy’s authority knows no bounds. A little something he learned from other world dictators leaders of HOPE and CHANGE.

               

Secondly, “flexible” and “standards” are generally not words used together in the same sentence by sticklers who think standards should be…well, standards. How inflexible of them.

Any way Big Guy is just issuing waivers to states that agree to follow his brand new set of rules and standards for the education of the mushy young brains of America’s future.

I understand the states will have to mandate uniforms in order to get their waivers too

Big Guy and  Arne just made up the new rules and standards themselves, since that’s usually what bogs down the people’s duly elected representatives to Congress.

In announcing his new education reform plan, Big Guy told a group of educators gathered at the Big White that “If something isn’t working, and it’s clear it isn’t, you’ve got to do something different.”

Bo, announcing his waivers. Unclear who all these people are, butt clearly it’s not the Glee Club.

I think I agree with that. So I wonder when we can expect to see waivers granted to all the states to opt out of Obama care? Because it doesn’t sound like Obamacare is shaping up to work out. And when we might see waivers granted to oil and gas companies, to let them start drilling again?. Because our Energy Policy sure isn’t working.  And I’ll check Big Guy’s schedule to see when he’ll be announcing his change of heart on passing that Jobs Bill, right away.

And when he’s done with that maybe he should call Ben Bernanke

H/T: SADHILL 

and tell him to scuttle the next planned “quantitative easing” and stop the printing presses.

Of course he can do all that after we put a new budget together that curtails all that deficit spending that doesn’t seem to be working out very well either.

Seriously; I think Big Guy’s finally on to something here.

 

IMPORTANT NOTE: Thank you to everybody who signed my petition at “We The People” petitioning Big Guy to resign right away. As of now, we still need 4,965 more signatures by 10-23 to get an official White House response, and 115 more to get my petition listed in official “We The People” search results. All this has to be done before Plouffe Daddy breaks through my new petition firewall. I have tweeted Rush Limbaugh seeking his help in gathering signatures. If you can think of anyone or any site that can help, please give them the direct link to my petition:

We the people petition Barack Obama to resign the office of President of the United States effective immediately.

We can CHANGE America Back!

Linked By: Larwyn’s Linx on Doug Ross@Journal, and  Claire @ SondraKistan, Thanks!

We The People.gov

This is the the email I got yesterday announcing that our new “We The People” initiative has gone live! That’s right, now anybody, with little or no effort, can:

1. Create and sign a petition,
2. Rally support for your cause by gathering signatures, and
3. Get an official response from a valued & loyal member of Team-Obama.

Now tell me that Big Guy’s days as a community organizer aren’t paying off. This isn't the first big 2012 campaign public service initiative we’ve rolled out. Our @ATTACKWATCH initiative on twitter is reaping big rewards and stopping the smear 5 days per week(we take weekends off here at the Big White, to “generate”). The response has been overwhelming. We have had unexpectedly robust participation from conservatives and R-words. Who’d of thunk they would be seeing something and saying something?

 

Thursday, September 22, 2011 You’re the first to know The White House has just launched We the People on WhiteHouse.gov and you're the first to know. We the People is a new way for Americans to create and sign petitions calling on the Obama Administration to take action on a range of important issues. Learn more and get started: We the People is easy to use. Here's how it works: Create or Sign a Petition: Anyone 13 or older can create or sign a petition on WhiteHouse.gov asking the Obama Administration to take action on a range issues. Build Support and Gather Signatures for your Petition: It's up to you to build support for a petition. Use email, Facebook, Twitter and word of mouth to tell your friends, family and coworkers about the petitions you care about. The White House Reviews and Responds: If a petition reaches 5,000 within 30 days, it will be reviewed by a standing group of White House officials, referred to any other relevant policymakers and an official response will be issued. The idea of petitioning the White House or the government isn't new, but this tool is. The White House has never tried anything like this before, and as a result, we'll probably have to make some adjustments as we go. As we do, we'll keep you posted on the White House blog. So think about an issue you care about, who you can reach out to join you, and get started: http://www.WhiteHouse.gov/Petitions P.S. Help spread the word about this new tool by forwarding this email to anyone else who would find We the People interesting. Stay Connected This email was sent to motus@michellesmirror.com Manage Subscriptions for motus@whitehouse.gov Sign Up for Updates from the White House Unsubscribe motus@whitehouse.gov | Privacy Policy Please do not reply to this email. Contact the White House The White House • 1600 Pennsylvania Ave NW • Washington, DC 20500 • 202-456-1111

Anyhoo, I’ve created and signed my first petition and HOPE that you will all help me rally support and gather signatures. In order to receive that official Big White response Big Guy promised, we need 4,999 signatures by 10-23-2011 and I know we can do it. Here’s the text of my petition sentence:

“We the people petition Barack Obama to resign the office of President of the United States effective immediately.”

I decided to follow a wise man’s advice and K.I.S.S.

 

 

I don’t think they’ll be able to trace this back to me, butt just to be safe, I’m going to be reflecting from the road for the next couple of days.

If you agree with my proposal on what action Big Guy’s Administration should take on this important issue, put it up on your facebook page. It’s our first bite of the apple and we only have until 10-23-2011! We can CHANGE America.

Yes we can!

And remember: be careful out there.

Linked By: BigFurHat @ iOwnTheWorld and, Reliapundit and, Blonde on NewsBusters, and ConservativeCanadian on Conservatives4Palin, and FLDemFem on NO QUARTER Thanks!

Peace is Hard, Butt We’ll Always Have Dancing.

Another day, another speech, another photo op (see yesterday’s post for coverage on that) for posterity.

Lady M was there with the other spouses to enjoy the days events. Here’s a little current events quiz for you: how many  (uncovered) knees do you see in the UN delegate’s spouse section?

I said knees.

Seriously, is Lady M amazing or what? Can you even believe that’s the same woman from the DNC soiree the night before? Tuesday night she was all, like, swooshed back updo; flirty, sexy, kitten-y even. Yesterday at the UN: all professional long, sleek tresses with bangs and business-like suit - except maybe the skirt could have been just a bit longer.

 

Kitten MO, left, Lioness MO right

I guess longer hair is de rigueur for the women of Washington this year. Although they don’t all wear it equally well, IMHO. So far I’d give the advantage to the women of the R-words camp.

Butt I report, you decide:                 

                       

Hill (D)

                        

                       Sarah (R)                      

                          

The other Michelle (R)

                           

Little Debbie (D)

Anyway, Big Guy’s  “Give peace a chance” speech at the UN yesterday, deemed “eloquent” by CNN, was not considered one of his best by others. In fact I’ve heard the term “stinker” used – and that was around the Big White. Some even suggested he might want to fire his staff of speech writers.

Oh dear! That’s not really going to be an option, as this is the one big speech Big Guy wrote himself. Which explains why Nile Gardiner across the pond thought it sounded “more like a professorial address by a university lecturer than a speech by the leader of the free world.” And that was the nicest thing he said. He went on to say it sounded like “several speeches cobbled together in haphazard fashion.” (Where’s Bill Ayers when you need him?) that was “hopelessly naive in parts.”

Wow! This Nile guy was brutal. He even pointed out that there was not one single applause line in the entire, interminably long, speech and that “a deathly, sceptical [ed. that’s British for “skeptical”] silence greeted the most powerful figure on earth.” And that was just Lady M’s reaction.

Butt don’t worry, the Wons have a lot of time to campaign before 2012 rolls around and they weren’t about to let a few bad reviews spoil their special NY date night. They put in an appearance at Bill Clinton’s annual “Global Initiative” – what ever that is –

then grabbed a quiet little dinner before flying back to Washington. Since Lady M was auditioning some new hair/nail and makeup people while we were in Gotham City, she arrived home sporting yet another new look. I call it her “young and swingy” side:

Big skirt, tiny cardi (don’t forget to hold hands! Only 14 more months till elections.)

And  I guess that both of the Wons really enjoyed those square dance patters we practiced on 9/11 because I think I spotted some new crinolines as they were deplaning! On Lady M, I mean.

“Comb your hair & button your shoe,
promenade home like you always do.”

Ah yes, peace may be hard butt we’ll always have dancing! 

Butt that’s another whole post.

Leading from behind: it may look like you’re dancing.

Linked By: Sparky on Gateway Pundit, Thanks!

The Middle Class Warriors Workin’ for Change: at Home and the Middle East

Whew! My Technical Difficulties Have Been Repaired!

Early this morning, the engineers at Echo brought the comment system back online. The outage was system wide and knocked the Echo1comment system offline on all websites using it. Butt now we’re back in business. Please resume gratuitous snarking!

MAJOR UPDATE: PHOTO SNEAKS PAST EMBARGO!

Good News everybody! The road warrior is back! As a warrior for the middle class – because no one else is on their side. And they tend to vote.

As you know, the Mr. and Mrs. landed in New York on Monday to perform one of the most critical obligations of Big Guy’s presidency.

No, not to veto the UN’s vote to grant statehood status to Palestine. That’s being handled by someone else. Hillary maybe. In what has come to be Big Guy’s hallmark, he’s just going to give a big speech today and leave the details up to the rest of the little people at the UN (in this context, “little people” would include everyone other than Big Guy).

Is there a body language expert in the room? I hope not too.

No, what I’m referring to is the far more important task of replenishing our war chest. No, not America’s war chest, I mean our war chest. Two DNC fundraisers yesterday: and what better way to get our Mojo back than sucking up the adulation of our groupies?

We may still have some work to do with our fan club in the Middle East though. It looks like we’re still having a failure to communicate there. I guess that Apology Tour for America in the Muslim world didn’t reap all of the benefits we were hoping for. I think Big Guy may have to do a Twitter Town Hall or something over there.

Palestinians, unaware of Attachwatch.com, burn an American flag in broad daylight. And without the required environmental permits. 

So we’ve decided to focus on the positive! Back to our fundraisers. Where else could the Won’s go to reclaim that 2008 old black magic? Thank goodness there are still enough rich people left who can afford to pay a little bit more. $2500 – $35,800 per seat more, to be exact. Butt for their money they got two Wons and a really good show:

  

We’ve practiced this over and over in front of a mirror (!)

Ah yes! Allusion and artifice! We aren’t the Wons by accident!

For Lady M’s part, she appeared at 2 fundraisers yesterday, the first one with the ladies who lunch.  Gloria Steinem, iconic feminist, not usually among the LWL crowd, was there to drop her dime into Big Guy’s pot. Odd, given all the talk about his, ahem, “woman problem” lately. Butt I guess he gets a pass because…well, I guess I don’t know why. I sure would hate to think it’s just a racist thing.

The really big show was last night though at Gotham Hall where America’s wealthiest millionaires and billionaires turned out to cheer on Big Guy’s class war against them. I don’t get that one either, butt maybe its because they heard BO say that “This is not class warfare - it’s math.” The way I’m programed to do math, the math doesn’t add up either, butt then, I don’t have a Master of Arts in Political Science with a certificate in political campaigning like some people do.

Anyway, back to the evening’s highlights, where Big Guy told the swooning crowd that they should contribute to he re-election campaign “right away”:

TOTUS, Big Guy and Lady M, declaring their allegiance to the Middle Class

Lady M and Big Guy had their best game faces on, coochie-cooing at each other about being “sexy” and “cute” and needing more “date nights” (ha!). And Big Guy really touched the crowd’s bleeding hearts when he lowered his voice and talked about being raised by a single mom (and grandma and grandpa) as “a little mixed kid in Honolulu.” You know we’re in full campaign mode when the audience needs to pack Kleenex.

Here’s a close up of MO’s famously toned shoulders and arms in her fashionable tuxedo vest. Unfortunately she forgot to pack the shirt and jacket that goes with it.

"Are you ready for work? We all have to be fired up and ready to go."

I sure don’t want to be the one to tell Lady M that there are millions and millions of Americans who have been ready for work for 3 years now. They’re still waiting.

Big Guy, the Nobel Peace Prize winner of 2009, will be meeting with Benji and Abbas later this morning to clear up that whole Palestine/Israel mess. He’s going to tell them both that they have to pass the proposal right away. He’ll also warn them that he’ll veto it if it doesn’t include a tax increase that ensures that everyone pays their fair share.

I’m not sure if he means that, or if he’s just getting his campaign message mixed up with his Leader of the Free World message.

 

Update. This just in from the UN. Per Big Guy, “Peace is hard.” Well, that explains everything! Except the Nobel Peace Prize.

Picking the winners is hard too

Major Update 2: UN Photo Embargo Breech

I’ve done my best to handle the optics here, butt Big Guy just keeps going rogue. This was the shot I authorized of Big Guy with some of the little UN people:

Was that enough? Nooooo. He’s got to pose for some additional shots after I left to go shopping with Lady M:

“Here I am, stuck in the middle with you”

I’m glad these little UN people found this so amusing.

Mr. Claire Shipman tried damage control saying that it looked “photoshopped to him”, but that doesn’t seem to have calmed the waters. Now, it’s been picked up by Rush Limbaugh, American Digest, Fausta and probably the whole wide world.

The only good thing about it is that maybe it will keep everybody focused on the picture and not his speech, which, in a nutshell was: “It’s hard.” (Didn’t the MSM make fun of George W for weeks for saying something, uh, identical to that? So I suppose we’re going to have deal with that too, no?) Anyway, I’m just glad they  didn’t get their mitts on this one:

Woops, sorry about that Tsakhia

Linked By: American Digest and Seriously on The Obama File, Thanks