When the Red, Red Robin Comes Bob, Bob, Bobbin’ Along

Wow! You’ve got to admire Lady M don’t you? Jammed into a busy week of praising Disney for banning ads for junk food from its airwaves

 

"Food and beverage advertisers who seek to promote their products on Disney Channel or Disney XD will be required by 2015 to meet guidelines regarding serving size, calories, fat and sugar content."

humping her new book (debuting at #1 on the NYT best seller list of gardening books by political wives!)

These aren’t ripe yet.

and humping (so-to-speak) for the reelection campaign,

Lady M  still found time to squeeze in one of her “most important jobs: being a mom”  responsibilities: by throwing a pre-teen pre-birthday party for Wee Won 2, who turned 11 yesterday.

File photo cuz u no the rules by now: no cell phones anywhere the WONs eat

Being the wonderful mother she is, Michelle jumped at the chance to give her daughter what she wanted. A get together with Sasha’s sister Malia and ten classmates was arranged earlier this week at a Red Robin in Virginia, and by all accounts, the afternoon couldn’t have gone more swimmingly. The girls chowed down on chicken sandwiches, burgers with avocado and milkshakes, while mom set aside her preference for healthy eating for a few hours.

According to US Magazine, sources at the restaurant have gushed about how easy to get along with and generous the whole party was.

Seriously, that’s what everyone says about Lady M, especially after the adult beverages have been served.

“Before leaving the restaurant, the First Lady left a generous tip for the server and tapped management on the shoulder to let them know ‘everything was wonderful and the girls had a great time.’”

You little people did a nice job today, Queenie

Quite honestly, I kind of like the idea of having a family and budget-friendly birthday party rather than those over-the-top soirees that include pony rides and live puppies in the kids’ goody bags. Kudos to the First Lady for keeping it real.

For sure:Keeping it real at the NBA playoffs in the Lakers box

Keeping it real on the Botswana savannah

Keeping it really real at the Nickelodeon Awards

 

Sadly, the President himself wasn’t able to get his own Red Robin fix in as he was off campaigning, [in young Hollywood]

 

but something tells me he picked up something special to celebrate Sasha officially becoming a tween.

Yo, dude, Sasha’s gonna love this!

I love it when the Obama’s do regular American things, and there are few more regular American things than overindulging at a chain restaurant.

 

Like the Red Robin…no wait; the Red Robin? Home of the “bottomless fries” Red Robin?

And the custom, what, like 5 pound hamburgers?

Special seasoning? (A secret blend of 20 herbs and spices, 99% of them salt. Sorry Mayor Bloomberg.)

Endless sugary beverages? (Again, sorry Bloomie)

Double barreled milkshakes?

And mile high mud pie?

Of course you could always get a dry grilled chicken filet sandwich and a nice glass of icy cold water with lemon.

Not that anyone did.

Butt then, it was all for the children. So I’m sure you all don’t mind picking up the check. And the very generous tip.

Thanks!

Linked By: Larwyn’s Linx on Doug Ross@Journal, and MRM on twitter, and NOBO2012 on Free Republic, anyonebutbarry2012 on GrettaWire, Thanks!

Graduating

Oh dear, it’s the graduation season. And MOTUS herself has to attend not one butt two graduation celebrations today so I only have a little time to post before embarking on a long day of reflective glory.

In  reelection campaign years, everything – including commencements - are political. For example, Big Guy’s Barnard address was considered a big “win” for telling women to take a seat at the table that Republicans were trying to get them to serve coffee at.

St. Barry, patron saint of women who love Obama

So like I said all commencement speeches are political. Except for when you give them that personal touch, and make it about you instead, like Lady M at Virginia Tech last month:

She also spoke about her personal experience with the healing power of helping others.

"I went through a similar process in my own life" at the age of 26, Obama said, after one of her best friends died of cancer and her father died of multiple sclerosis.

"For months, I felt like I couldn't breathe," she said, recalling memories of her father and how hard her parents worked to provide for her family and help her and her brother attend college.

"And as I grieved, I came to realize that the best way for me to honor my dad's life was by how I lived my own life," said Obama, who said she quit her job at a big Chicago law firm and ultimately started a community-based nonprofit that helped young people.

So there’s a message in there for graduates. Somewhere. Oh yes: it’s not all about landing a high paying job. There are other ways to become wealthy.

And then of course there is the special Joey B style commencement speech:

Yelling

He mesmerized the graduates of Cypress Bay High School in Miami at the the new Marlins’ ballpark:

 

Is it just me, or does his echo chamber speech make him sound like Principal Poop at More Science High?

High School Madness:  Firesign Theater

Raw! Raw! Raw!

Anyway, Joey told the kids how special they all were:

"What you’ve built in 10 years is amazing," the vice president said at the graduation ceremony for Cypress Bay High School, the first such event to be held at Marlins Park.

"As we’ve heard from your principal, you haven’t just distinguished yourself on the field, you’ve distinguished yourself in every field – soccer championships, tennis championships, math championships. More AP tests than I can count, and nationally ranked debaters," Biden said.

Unlike a certain Mr. McCullough Jr. whose commencement address at Wellesley High School  last week provided a rather unwelcomed reality check by telling the grads how decidedly un-special they were:

Driving the point home, he added, "Think about this: even if you're one in a million, on a planet of 6.8 billion that means there are nearly 7,000 people just like you."

The teacher warned students that Americans have come to appreciate accolades more than genuine achievement, and will compromise standards in order to secure a higher spot on the social totem pole.

"As a consequence, we cheapen worthy endeavors, and building a Guatemalan medical clinic becomes more about the application to Bowdoin than the well-being of the Guatemalans," he said.

In the quest for accomplishment, everything gets watered down. A 'B' is the new 'C.' Midlevel courses are the new advanced placement, the teacher said.

Butt what would Mr. McCullough know, he’s just an English Teacher.  And Joey B, I might just point out, is Vice President!

Of the United States!

All 57 of them!

Which reminds of a H. L. Menken quote:

The government consists of a gang of men exactly like you and me. They have, taking one with another, no special talent for the business of government; they have only a talent for getting and holding office.

So, keep that in mind as your sons, daughters, grandkids, nieces and nephews graduate this year. Any one of them could grow up to be president someday. That’s exactly how special they are.

On the other hand, there’s nothing wrong with being an accountant.

Unless, it was your understanding that there would be no math. (h/t: SNL)

Linked By: NOBO2012 on Free Republic, and MRM on twitter, Thanks!

If you like your economy, you can keep your economy-UPDATED

BREAKING NEWS UPDATE: This post was given the 1st Place Award by Adrienne’s Corner:

Butt, the first place award goes to MOTUS, who reflected the real meaning of that miserable press conference with a depth of understanding only a mirror can produce - and we thank her.

Please join me in scampering over to Adrienne’s Corner to thank her for this truly magnificent award!

Lady M decided to lay low yesterday after Thursday’s trip to the pie store.

I wish I’d brought a larger pie bag, I can only get two in this one.

Just as well, I had my hands full. I was called in to provide some optics for the Big Read and Presser. You probably saw my handiwork on your teevee:

Did you see it?

      

Stage left, no MOTUS optics, stage right, MOTUS enhanced gravitas

Due to the gravitas of the issues being discussed yesterday, Big Guy felt he needed to project a little extra awesomeness so he had me reflect his world famous Oracle of Delphi columns onto our stock stage set presidential podium backdrop:

Because everyone remembers how well they worked the first time we used them:

Of course I had to scale them back a little. Butt I think yesterday’s historic “the private economy is just fine,” and “I’m insulted you would think otherwise”  presser went pretty well, don’t you? At least the optics end of it?

Although I’ve heard from Dewey’s Flatsimile Studios that I’ve violated Dewey’s copyright on the cartoon stage set he created for Big Guy:

“Bitch stole my set!”

I’m hoping to negotiate an out of court settlement, and since I’ve retained Dewey as my attorney I’m pretty sure I can.

Anyway, I just thought I should point out that everyone missed the real news in yesterday’s presser:

Today, we’re fighting back from the deepest economic crisis since the Great Depression.

with no exit in sight

We’ve created 4.3 million jobs over the past 27 months. The private sector is doing fine.

doin’ fine there

Where we’re seeing problems is with state and local government,

not so fine here

often with cuts initiated by governors or mayors who are not getting the kind of help they’re accustomed to from the federal government.

really, really not fine

 

The big challenge we have in our economy right now is state and local government hiring has been going in the wrong direction.  You've seen teacher layoffs, police officers, cops, firefighters being laid off…

oftentimes, cuts initiated by governors or mayors who are not getting the kind of help that they have in the past from the federal government and who don’t have the same kind of flexibility as the federal government in dealing with fewer revenues coming in. 

The problem is that it requires Congress to take action, and we're going to keep pushing them to see if they can move in that direction.

So,while everyone’s yapping about “the private sector is doing fine” comment, they missed the big point of Big Guy’s message: without government there is no economy.

Let’s connect the dots: a) the economy is in the dumpster, b) the private sector is doing fine, and c) state and local government hiring has been going in the wrong direction, ipso fatso, we need to send more federal money to state and local governments to avoid the lay off of any more public employees.

Got it? The Economy = Government. The economy is only bad because public employment is down; the private sector is robust (with the exception for that teeny little segment called “construction” butt that isn’t really all that important).

Of course that’s a lie an exaggeration: partially true only through the miracle of government mathamagicals which un-counted all the jobs lost during Big Guy’s first year in office (because those must have been Bush’s fault, right?)and counts all temporary (e.g. Census) and part-time jobs. And although almost everyone else knows our “robust” jobs numbers were achieved by magic tricks, Big Guy really thinks the private sector jobs number is robust. Like the Wisconsin re-call results, nobody really wants to tell him.

Butt I digress: the truth is Big Guy really, really believes the economy IS the government sector. Or at least that’s his vision for the economy. There’s a term for that, what is it again? Oh yes: “Socialism.”

 

Butt after that, all holy-hell broke loose - damn, that RRRT (Romney Rapid Response Team) is fast –

 

… and Big Guy had to calm things down a little:

The president walked back the comment later in the day. ""It is absolutely clear that the economy is not doing fine," he said. "That's why I had a press conference."

 

“Let me make this perfectly clear.”

Well, we did the best we could. It’s not as easy to walk something back as you might think. Just ask the Big Dawg.

Anyway, after that, the day was on a definite upswing. The Giants were here to celebrate their NFL Superbowl championship, followed by a swanky $40k/plate fundraiser.

Let’s check in with the 24/7 BO-tie economic indicator cam for an instant read:

Definitely on an uptick. Either that, or it’s just blowing in the wind.

Linked By: Adrienne’s Corner With 1st Place Award!!!, and NOBO2012 on Free Republic, and MRM on twitter,  and Lara Martinez on twitter, Thanks!

Barry and Kumar

As the Congressional Intelligence Committee investigates major and dangerous high level security leaks, House Oversight Committee Chairman Issa continues hearings on “Fast and Furious:” 

Ricky explains to Jason Chaffetz what the meaning of “is” is.

and and the House Judiciary Committee grills Ricky on the DOJ’s refusal to uphold voter ID laws…

Big Guy was busy tending to the important presidential responsibilities: raising awareness of his need to raise money for the upcoming battle with the R-words. Here’s the group of young Hollywood gazillionaires he met with yesterday to make sure they’ve got his back. He needs them to help him get out the youth vote and to fill that quickly depleting campaign war chest.

Young Hollywood gets an early morning call for “Breakfast with Barack”

This week’s New strategy: getting out the celebrity youth vote.

Sources tell The Hollywood Reporter that the meeting was part of the Obama re-election campaign’s “Young America Effort,” an initiative to build support and turnout among the younger voters who were key to the president’s election four years ago

Because, as we’ve discussed before, that’s where the money is. And they have the best access to the most malleable minds of mush.

Plus, it’s looking like there may not be enough registered dead Democratic voters to pull off a convincing victory, so we’re hoping young Hollywood will help us sign up a new constituency of as-yet unregistered voters: the pre-dead, pre-adults. That’s right, tweens! After all, who has more at stake in America’s future than tweenagers?

Justin Bieber at Winter Holiday Party, Willow Smith (then 10) performing at Big White 2011 Easter Egg Roll

So we’ve launched an (unofficial) campaign to make sure they all get a chance to register and vote for Big Guy in November too. Because after all, we just want to make sure that every one – regardless of sex, race or age - gets a fair shake to cast their fair share of votes.

Anyway, some of the young stars of Hollywood that Big Guy had breakfast with include – well, probably nobody you know:

Among those who met with the president were The Avengers star Jeremy Renner, Glee actress Dianna Agron, Star Trek's  Zachary Quinto, Southland's Ben McKenzie, Jessica Alba, Bryan Greenberg, Adam Rodriguez, Zach Braff, Brandon Routh, Ian Somerhalder, Jared Leto, Kal Penn and Sophia Bush

…whoa! Hold the phone! Kal Penn!?

Kal Penn, star of the small and large screen Kal Penn? Kal Penn, the actor that Big Guy is a huge fan of, and vice-versa, Kal Penn? Wow!  Big Guy admires Kal’s work so much he even created a special job for him in the Big White. He had to leave after a few months to spend more time on his career, butt still.

You may know Kal not from his Big White duties butt from his starring roles in the hugely successful modern day adaptations of the original Choomer Cheech and Chong flicks, the adventures of Harold and Kumar:

   

I’m not looking to start any rumors here or anything, butt I have heard discussions about the possibilities of Big Guy teaming up with Kal again on a future project:

Brought to you by the creator of the hit movie “Dude. Who Stole my Choomwagon?” Opening sometime after November 6, 2012.

Well, I’ve got to run. We’re setting up for a rare, unannounced presser. I think Big Guy will be reading about the economy, intelligence leaks and the do-nothing Congress. I’ll explain tomorrow why I have to be there.

Oh, and for the record: if there’s any lingering doubt in your mind as to whether Billy Bob Clinton is suffering from senility due to his misremembering the requirements for when we have to deal with taxes and spending issues, – which lead to his sincere apology - Charles Krauthammer explains his word salad here. 

And I’d just like to remind you that, unlike Big Guy, the Big Dawg didn’t inhale.

 

Oh and speaking of choomwagons, I know you already discussed this yesterday:

Butt despite our ongoing embargo on rear end views here’s yet another leaked document from the Big White: a photo of Lady M getting her choomba into the choomwagon. Now I think someone will finally get to the bottom of these leaks.

Linked By: Moonbattery, and Larwyn’s Linx on Doug Ross@Journal, and Lady Liberty 1885, and Blonde on News Busters, and NOBO2012 on Free Republic, and anyonebutbarry2012 on GretteWire, Thanks!