Sunday, January 17, 2010

When Snarks Attack: 4

Well it’s that time again. But as I mentioned a while back, the super-secret field assignments I’ve gotten lately have put quite a bite into my blog time. The biggest problem has been that my super-secret Snark of the Week nominating committee has likewise been dispatched to help with all of the humanitarian crises we’ve been handling: securing our “Kennedy Senate seat,” our healthcare rationing plan, the whiney veggie-doubles litigation and a bunch of other stuff. So I was thinking, why don’t I ask you for a little help? 

Would you be angels and help by being my super-secret nominating committee? I think it would be a lot of fun and it will still be super-secret since you won’t know who’s been nominated until nominations are closed and I post the final nominees for voting. I know it’s a lot to ask, so I’m switching to a semi-monthly contest (that’s every 2 weeks, for those of you with “semi-bi” dyslexia).  And here’s the best part, you can nominate your own snarky comment (and (shhh) nobody will know).  As long as Big Guy isn’t near. He doesn’t believe in secret ballots. Unless they’re from ACORN.

ObamaVotingwMichelleTasosKatopodis“No, no, no; we’re not voting for Hillary any more.”


Here are the rules for the nominations phase:

1- Chicago rules Do Not apply. Although if you go into any Acorn office dressed like a  hooker or Lady M, they will show you how to get around any voting rule.

2- Snarks must have been snarky between 12:01 Sunday, December 27, 2009 and 11:59 Saturday, January 16, 2010. (yes, I know that’s 3 weeks, but we have a little catch up from the holidays – we were on vacation you know)

3- Polls will be open for our historic administration’s standard 72 hour lag time.

4- Ten (10) Snark Finalists will be posted for final voting, you guessed it, 72 hours after the polls close.

5- If more than 10 Snarks are nominated, selection of Snark finalists will be based on the number of times a Snark has been nominated (so get down to your local Acorn office to figure out how to hack into the voting ASAP).

6- For this week’s nominations only, our “Keep the Kennedy Seat in the Family” Rule has been imposed by Toes: If you are a registered voter in Massachusetts, or are willing to be bussed in next Tuesday, and promise to vote against that dreamy Scott Brown (sigh) at least once, you’ll be automatically nominated. You most likely won’t win, but you will be nominated.

scott brown 2 mcawesome012010

h/t: my favorite Hill Buzz boys for pics (and (shhh), supporting Scotty)

To enter a nomination, click the “Other” button and give an abbreviation of the post title, the Snarker’s name, and the date & time of the snark. Space is limited, so brevity matters. Just ask Scott.

If you don’t want to nominate anyone, I’ve included two handy pre-written answers. If you choose the second one, tweet me right away and follow up with an email disclosing the “amount” (full disclosure: all “proceeds” go to the Lady M Fund for Massachusetts Voters with Severe Ballot Error Disorders. We’re anticipating a recount.).

Ok Snarks and Snarkettes, let the nominations begin!