Thursday, January 27, 2011

Taking the WTF Tour on the Road

This week, President Obama, Vice President Biden, and members of the President’s Cabinet will travel across the country to highlight the President’s plan for winning the future and creating jobs by out-innovating, out-educating and out-building the rest of the world. 

White House Press Release


The day after the most eloquent speech in the history of the Republic, Big Guy kicked up his WTF campaign, 2012 version, in Manitowoc, Wisconsin.

125280337AazdlF_fs Manitowoc: Big Guy’s beacon of light in a frozen wasteland 

Located on the shore of Lake Michigan, here’s a little known fun fact about Manitowoc: in 1962 a 20 pound chunk of Sputnik 4 fell to earth, landing in the middle of North 8th street in the middle of the night. Big Guy told his audience that they believe it, butt until yesterday morning, he had no idea about the Sputnik connection to Manitowoc!

"It was part of a satellite called Sputnik that landed right here, and that set the Space Race in motion," Obama said. "So I want to say to you today that it's here, more than 50 years later, that the race for the 21st century will be won."

I’m not sure about winning the race for the 21st century, but that is proof that he had no idea about the Sputnik coincidence. The “Sputnik moment” that inspired Kennedy’s challenge and Big Guy’s SOTU speech was Sputnik 1, launched in 1959 (prior to BO’s alleged birth in Hawaii).

The White House to Main Street trip yesterday started with a visit to Orion Energy Systems, manufacturer of high intensity modular fluorescent lighting, and other “innovative” solar and energy saving products.

orion Let there be light!

And this year, we’re all about innovation. It’s how we’re going to “win the future” (WTF: the Big White’s words, not mine).

Next on our innovation tour: Skana Aluminum, which reopened recently after being shuttered for a year due to the previous owners bankruptcy. Skana currently has over 70 employees and expects to reach 100 employees in 2011.

multi handed O Big Guy demonstrates some of the innovative techniques being used at Skana: multi-tasking.

BO also visited TowerTech while he was in town, noting that it was "one of the largest wind tower manufacturers in North America — a company that's grown by several hundred workers in recent years."

Wow! several hundred! In recent years!! That’s the kind of innovation we’re talking about! At that rate, the 900 jobs lost when Mirro Cookware moved their manufacturing jobs to Mexico can be replaced in less than a decade!

Butt Big Guy is doing his best. Just last December he signed Incentives to Support Investments in Renewable Energy: 

“an extension of the 1603 grant program, which provides incentives for the production of renewable energy like wind and solar. For example, some of Orion’s customers have benefited from this program, supporting demand for its products.”

Translation: products not economically viable without being subsidized by American taxpayers. Butt that’s OK because it will make us more INNOVATIVE! And windmills and solar panels are technically INFRASTRUCTURE, right? We’ll work on the “economically viable” part later, when we make everyone use wind and solar energy. In the mean time, two out of three ain’t bad.

broadway here i come The Won, rehearsing  his WTF Tour at Orion Energy. He’s planning to take it on the road for the next two years. Watch for it in a city near you.

The only problem I can see with Big Guy’s WTF tour – and using one of his sports analogies  -  instead of putting one in the win column, it’s starting to look a lot more like we’re committed to snatching defeat from the jaws of victory.

And it’s probably all due to our lack of civility.


BTW, upon returning to Washington, Big Guy was met with another round of Global Warming. Just the thing we’re trying to save the planet from by investing all your money in clean energy innovation.