Monday, March 29, 2010

Bloodsuckers, Blimps, Botox and Bozo. Oh My!

So here’s all I’ve got for you today: Lady M and Big Guy lost the Nickelodeon People’s Choice Award for “cutest couple” to Taylor Lautner and Twilight co-star Kristen Stewart.

ex_taylor_lautner_kristen_stewartFine. Although I do want to raise a few issues: a) they’re not a real couple, they just play one on TV  b) they’re like - what? - 13?  c) neither of them are even half African American and d) unlike the O’s, again, they just play blood-sucking vampires on TV. What’s wrong with those stupid kids who voted anyway? Don’t they know a historic presidency when they see it? 

At least we snagged the “Big Help” award. And that’s better than being just cute anyway, right? We wore one of our lovely argyle sweaters. You might recognize it from last year’s spring trip to visit the Queen. If it’s good enough for the Queen, it’s good enough for Nickelodeon. And see: it still fits. If by “fits” you mean 13 year old Kirsten Stewart.

why isn't this orange Lady M graciously accepts her Nickelodeon award remotely. I don’t know why hers isn’t orange. It looks more like a cocktail shaker in silver. Or a torpedo.

In other news, the wraps and Botox aren’t turning out quite as well as we’d hoped, but there’s good news: Carla’s Botox turned out even worse.

  mo accepts nicks big help awardyikes carla


She actually looks like she could play Kirsten’s blood-sucking vampire mom on Twilight. Although she does look better behind her giant Dior goggles:


carla2Carla arrives in New York Sunday.

Meanwhile, Big Guy flew off to Afghanistan without telling Lady M about it, which is never a good idea.She wouldn’t have gone with him anyway, but she likes being able to tell him how much she’s done for the country, and how exhausted she is with all of her responsibilities, and how inconsiderate he is to even ask her to do more.

There will be hell to pay when he gets back.

He did have a great time greeting the troops in his flight jacket though:

i cn't hear you Is it just me, or is Big Guy starting to look like Dr. Spock? Except for the ears, of course.



He’s not a real  Starfleet Commander in Chief, but he does play one in Washington. Remind me to tell you what Big Guy thinks the Prime Objective is someday. You’ll get a real kick out of it.