Monday, June 13, 2011

WTF. Californication, Here I Come!

As you can see, everyone is very excited about Lady M coming to California:

Here’s what we know so far:

Our very busy day started at 10:00 AM PDT with a “story meeting” with members of the “creative” guilds and unions (aka, writer, actors and directors)to discuss:

"the stories and issues of today’s military families so that their experiences can be integrated into film, television and digital media,"

A “story meeting” is Hollywood buzz for a panel discussion. Lady M was joined on the panel by Katherine Fugate, creator of the lifelike Lifetime series “Army Wives.” So that should be good. Plus it justifies us packing up Air Force One II for the cross-country fundraiser PR photo op Joining Forces Inter-guild Task Force (Starring Stephen Spielberg and Tom Hanks – two long time supporters of Big Guy! Happy coincidence!).

kearns hanksTom Hanks,at the O’s Embassy Dinner for the Queen

Director J.J. Abrams moderated.

jjand lady mJ.J. idolizes Lady M. The feeling isn’t mutual

I don’t like to butt in or anything, butt if they really want to figure out how better to reflect the reality of military families, I can help. First: you stop reflecting fraudulent alternate realities (something I know a thing or two about) and start reflecting reality (something I still know a thing or two about). Butt I don’t think that’s what they really want to do. It’s television, for goodness sake. It’s just like print media, only with moving images and talking heads.

joining forcesThis has been fun, butt I’ve got to run now

Then, we had lunch in Pasadena ($1000 a plate fundraiser for the DNC) It was lovely, about 500 of Lady M’s biggest supporters in Pasadena. And the ones who popped for $10,000 got photos and “private time.” Which, BTW, is what Sasha asked for and received for her birthday: a weekend with the Wons at Camp David. Too bad Daddy had to return early to golf, and Mommy was so busy lining up her contacts in California. It was still good. We did have cake and ice cream.)

Oh yes, and then we had to jam in the taping of Lady M’s starring role in  iCarly over at Nickelodeon before our next fund raiser for the DNC. I’ve seen the script, and as far as I can tell, they pretty much type casted Lady M. She just has to come in and tell a bunch of kids what they did wrong, and what she would do instead and then preach to them about respecting rules and boundaries and blah blah blah. At least that’s what I got out of it.

Tonight, a $1000 a plate dinner (hey! nobody said healthy food was cheap. That’s why we have to get more money to give to the SEIU to feed the children). The dinner’s being held at the home of Michael Smith (you remember him, right? He’s the one who designed the Big White family quarters around Lady M’s wardrobe. Or was that the other way around?)


And he also redid Big Guy’s office. Anyway,  as you might imagine, he has a huge, gorgeous home to die for that he shares with boyfriend and HBO executive James Costos in the tres ritzy Holmby Hills neighborhood. The wire will say it’s in Beverly Hills, butt trust me, HH is w-aaaay nicer.

It’s nice because now we have friends at all of the big media conglomerates!  Other than Fox, of course. I sure hope Ricky doesn’t decide to look into collusion in BIG MEDIA like we did with BIG OIL. Because we can’t afford to tick off the Hollywood set the way we did the Wall Street crowd. They provide not only funds for the campaign coffers, butt “in-kind contributions” that we can’t possibly put a price tag on.

Expect BIG names at tonight’s soiree.