Divas In Denver

Suffice it to say that if Fran Drescher and Susan Sarandon look more appropriate than you do, it’s not a particularly good day.

Susie and MO at the Governor’s luncheon: nice touch with Lady M’s contrasting argyle patterned skirt made from more leftover upholstery fabric

Fran at Aurora Central High in navy dress and knee boots

OK, Susan was wearing tennis shoes, and Fran had knee boots on, but other than that they managed to look pulled together.I’m not sure why, but MO changed into gray slacks after lunch for her appearance at South High. Probably to be more “comfortable,” if you know what I mean.

All in all I’d say the mentoring in Denver went well. When South High Student Body President Linda Jiminez complained to Lady M about how unfair standardized testing was because in her school many students don’t even speak English, MO just explained that that’s the oppressive system that white men have put in place and it’s not likely to go away any time soon. Then she went on to explain that she herself, who did speak English, didn’t do so hot on standardized tests in high school either. But when it came time to pick a college, she said Princeton looked mostly at her writing and leadership skills, as well as her extra curricular activities. So I guess being president of the stamp collectors club really paid off for her.

Come to think of it, that’s pretty much how Big Guy got into Harvard too. So here’s the take away girls: work on the writing (English optional), leadership and extra curricular (cheer leading is especially good) activities, and one day you too might be proud to be an American.

Technorati Tags: michelle obama,mentoring program,standardized tests

The Rocky Mountain Horror Show: In Pictures

Great, Lady M has the sniffles and I think I’m coming down with a virus too.

I‘ve heard that the H1N1 virus can crash my hard drive, and even though there’s a security patch for it, I’m not eligible because my basic architecture is too old. Kathleen Sebelius claims that I should have had a patch installed back in the 90’s. I don’t know, I heard rumblings that they just didn’t order enough of the software patches, and ever since that “Joey and the Pirates” post, Katy has been a little cool towards me.

But we’re still soldiering on: doing our part for the American people while Big Guy continues to trip over his protocol experts in the far East. Today we’ll be in Denver: the mile high city. I thought at first it was the ribbon cutting ceremony at the city’s first medical marijuana clinic, but that must be next month.

Today we’re kicking off another in MO’s series of mentoring programs for young girls. We’ll be at the Governor's Mansion for a Girls Mentoring Luncheon, and I’m sure Lady M will manage to say a few inspirational words. In addition to the girls who’ve been selected as mentees, Lady M invited Susan Sarandon and Fran Drescher to attend.

I”m sure they’ll both make great mentors for young women. I believe their specific forte is dressing for success. Just like MO.

Susan Sarandon impersonating the Green Fairy

Susan as the red queen with extra baggage and without hands

Fran, before belly button fatigue set in, wearing the equally short-lived fad of sweaters with a spare sleeve.

And of course, here’s Susan in her breakout role in the Rocky Horror Picture Show, 1975. Note: ever the trendsetter,Susan was wearing underwear as a costume before Madonna was even out of high school.

Technorati Tags: Rocky Horror Picture Show,H1N1 vaccine,Michelle Obama's mentoring program

Pull The Drapes, and Pass the Ammunition

Why oh why does she do this to me? It’s not as if she’s unaware of all those snarky bloggers out there constantly harping on her proclivity for wearing clothes constructed from ordinary household items: tablecloths, upholstery fabric and (the worst) draperies. Not to mention the barrage of criticism about her belts: “boob cinchers”, “fan belts”, “Bentley grilles” and “cemetery gates”.

So why, why, WHY would she dress like this? And pose in this room, on that chair, with those draperies in the background?

All three, in one picture. Why don’t we just hand the enemy their ammunition?

Is she trying to overload my circuits? Cause permanent damage to my hard drive?

It’s either that or a clear cry for help. I’m going to tweet Oprah and Dr. Phil  as soon as I’m done here.

Sacrifice Like Me

Stinging a little from the criticism of her looking like a smurf-ette at the Tomb of the Unknowns, Lady M changed into something a bit more casual for her hit appearance at George Washington University with the Mrs. B.

In case you don’t recognize the outfit right at first, here’s another view:

She’s wearing her Zero + Maria Cornejo jacket that first showed up at the Copenhagen disaster tour a few weeks back.

I honestly thought she had burned everything she wore on that trip.

From what I could make of the event, she was trying to convince Veteran’s to join forces with her and Big Guy’s civilian Service Corp in order to better serve the country. BO signed into law earlier this year a national service legislation that includes a Veterans Corps, “designed to engage veterans in service.”

I guess giving an arm and a leg isn’t enough anymore.

Technorati Tags: Civilian service corp,Veteran's service core,veterans

Hark! Is That a Democrat Waking to the Drumbeat of History?

Wow! WoW!! WOW!!!!

MOTUS just wants you to go read this post as soon as possible. Hat tip to one of MOTUS’ Anon commenters. It will speak for itself:

Thank you Former President George W. Bush and Former First Lady Laura Bush.

Normally I wouldn’t do this, but it makes me proud to have served in the previous Administration, even though I didn’t get to go on as many fun vacations as I do now.

Post is from HillBuzz, which also posted this snarkily captioned photog of yesterday’s ceremony:

One of these things is not like the others.

 

Please, don’t tell Lady M about this post or my glass ass will be grass. Then I’ll end up at the NASA Lab for a week getting all the cracks filled and polished down.

And no; MO was not purposefully impersonating a Smurf.

Technorati Tags: Veteran's Day Memorial. Tomb of the Unknown Soldiers

Is That Ammunition Belt An Appropriate Veteran’s Day Accessory?

Oh dear, oh dear!  I thought Lady M and I had an understanding about the radiator belt. But she’s been none too agreeable ever since her poll numbers were released and she found out that Bo’s (the dog, not Big Guy) favorables are higher than hers. Just beating the pants off Big Guy wasn’t good enough, she needs to beat the dog too. Honestly, the egos around here are a little - shall we say -fragile? Although it doesn’t help that articles like this keep popping up on the blogs either.  Maybe I can get the CIA to block certain sites from her computer, to avoid domestic unrest.

But here’s how it went down this morning: We’re all dressed and heading over to Arlington Cemetery for the Veteran’s Day ceremony at the Tomb of the Unknown Soldiers.We’re heading out the south portico, Secret Service already in lock step behind everyone, and everything seems to be fine. Then, from out of no where, MO whips out her fan belt and cinches it around the waist of her J.Crew turquoise tweed coat.

A stealth attack. What could I do? I’m already operating at diminished capacity due to the rain, and then she pulls this on me? I didn’t bother downloading the last giant-belt software update because –as I already told you – I thought we had an agreement. You see the results; a perfectly good look totally ruined.

And in case you’re wondering why Lady M is looking so smug, it’s because she slipped one past me. Have they not heard the expression “don’t bite off your nose to spite your face” in South Chicago?

Technorati Tags: Tomb of the Unknown Soldiers,Veteran's Day ceremony,Arlington Cemetery,Michelle Obama

Fort Hood Memorial: It’s Not About Us. Or Terrorism, Apparently

A sad occasion, so let’s just say Lady M does not look awful and leave it at that. I think I can declare victory with the dress and jewelry, but respectfully deny any responsibility for the Klingon hairdo that I couldn’t talk her out of or otherwise deflect.

  The President and Mrs. Obama depart for Fort Hood Memorial

The Obamas arrive for Fort Hood memorial for our fallen heroes.

A sad day for the families and a sad day for America. But at least Lady M is starting to grasp the concept of appropriate mourning clothing. Although she’s sill trying to blame the last fiasco on her social secretary who put it in her Blackberry as “morning” ceremony for Medal of Honor winner.

It’s still uncomfortable duty for both BO and MO so we’re going to have a task force put together to figure out how to prevent other Islamic extremist officers from going rogue. Apparently it’s going to require more than Halal meals and time off for Ramadan.

 

Technorati Tags: Fort Hood memorial service,fallen soldiers

BO’s Video Conference at Brandenburg

I have been inundated with questions about why Lady M and Big Guy didn’t attend today’s big 20th anniversary celebration at the Brandenburg Gate commemorating the end of communism. At least in Germany.

But come on, we’ve already been there, done that. Remember? It was one of our earliest campaign stops. While it seemed a bit odd at the time, since Germans couldn’t actually vote in the U.S. election, it makes more sense now that we know BO is “president to the world.”

Angie absolutely loves Big Guy, that’s why she went out of her way to invite him to today’s celebration. And I’m sure she understood how busy we all are around here. MO had to appear on the Sesame Street anniversary show – a little bigger over here than the dumb wall thing in Germany – and BO’s still celebrating last Saturday’s slick win with Toes and Nancy.

Besides, I’ve got to help MO pick out a more appropriate frock for the Fort Hood memorial service tomorrow. The last time she honored one of our fallen heroes there was simply no end to the criticism over the dress (which, I repeat for the millionth time, I advised her not to wear.)

We hope to do better this time.

But getting back to the Brandenburg flap: it’s not like we weren’t represented. Video tape. It’s a beautiful thing.

Obama’s Video Feed at the Brandenburg Gate Celebration

How cool is that! It reminded me of Big Guy’s acceptance speech at the Democratic convention way last year.

 Obama’s Acceptance Speech at INVESCO Field

Got to love those classic columns. Communism is optional.

Technorati Tags: Brandenburg Gate,fall of communism,Fort Hood memorial