Thursday, October 1, 2009

Bringing Home the Bacon: It’s What We Do

Lunch was a bust: smorgasbord. Again. They do love fishy little things on bread with pickles over here. Oprah was not pleased either.

But look at Denmark's Queen Margrethe: you can just tell by looking at her that all she ever eats are sardines. On the other hand, Prince Henrik, the  Queen’s husband, seems to enjoy a cheese Danish occasionally.danish royals 

 frederik and mary

Danish Crown Prince Frederik and Crown Princess Mary - above, right: more fish eaters.

Queen Magrethe speaks English quite well,  so right away when she started yammering at us in her native tongue: “Når jeg så dem få ud af flyvemaskinen, og jeg så, hvor store deres bag ser i denne påklædning jeg troede, min gud, vil hun ikke har et spejl?” it raised my skepticism lens to code red.

I usually rely on TOTUS for translations, since he has all the language packs pre-loaded, but since he won’t arrive until later tonight, I had to run it through my laptop language converter. You won’t believe it, but – and this is a direct translation – it means “When I saw you get off the airplane, and I saw how large your behind looked in that dress I thought, my God, does she not have a mirror?”

A mirror!? Hellooo! Of course she has a mirror:a high-tech, state of the art one at that. I wouldn’t have told Lady M what Queenie said, except I want her to understand how important it is to allow me to deplane first from now on.

Just to prove my point, please note these pics from the Copenhagen Opera House for the IOC opening ceremony, where I’ve been fully deployed:

Better, you must admit.mo-olympics mo oly2 

And I hope you didn’t miss the symbolism of this beautiful gold dress: We are definitely bringing home the gold, in more ways than one.