Tuesday, July 13, 2010

When Snarks Attack 8: The Winner

The polls are closed, the results are in and the 8th Golden FLOTUS is in the hands of another MOL. The winner of the June 2010 Snark Attack Of The Month is:

arabella trefiol

Congratulations arabella trefoil!!! Your “manorexic” snark won you the fame and ovation of gazillions MOLs, MODs and FOMs all over the planet, and earned a permanent place in my Snark Hall of Fame.

Arabella trefoil’s out of the park snark: “... Maybe he's a manorexic...“ brought the Golden FLOTUS around all the bases to her home plate. Don’t you just love sports analogies?

Apparently, your winning snark, also inspired a hit “song” by the punk-alternate band “Scarling” (who obviously can see into the future):

PLAY WHILE YOU READ IF YOU WISH

He's utterly sarcastic- aesthetically confused
He tells me I'm bombastic I want to be his muse
An ordinary person who peeked into his void
Would only wake up bitter and deeply paranoid


He's unenthusiastic. Emotionally abused
He's thinks that it's fantastic- I'd walk ten miles in his shoes
As I watch him disappearing. I know that it's not right
I love him completely - At least for tonight


Do do do....
There's a lack of understanding a mutual malaise
He thinks I'm reprimanding with my uncertain gaze
Though -I can't conceal my feelings ...Like he can't purge his Pain


Cause once he sees a mirror.... logic goes down the drain
He's unenthusiastic. Emotionally abused
He's thinks that it's fantastic I'd walk ten miles in his shoes
As I watch him disappearing. I know that it's not right
I love him completely - At least for tonight


There's a roughness to our romance- A sadness to his step
And though he won't admit it... I know he's often wept
Perhaps it's just frustration, at stars he'll never reach
Reflecting his self image.... Bleeding poetry in the sheets


He's unenthusiastic. Emotionally abused
If I wrap him up in plastic, I'll save the part he'll never use
I watch him disappearing. I try to hold on tight
Can't love him completely - At least not tonight

So, arabella trefoil, the cherished Golden FLOTUS is yours forever, to use and display as you wish, and will always and forever be here in my coveted Snark Hall of Fame.

arabella trefoil GF-final

It was a big turnout at the polls with over 5 million votes cast. Toes certified the final count after it was certified by our new New Black Panther Party accountants. The results (rounded to the nearest thousand) were are as follows:

  1. arabella trefoil – 1,820,000
  2. Anonymouse – 1,120,000
  3. MichelleIndependent – 630,000
  4. PortiaElizabeth – 420,000
  5. MJ – 330,000
  6. nellyq / Suzette – 230,000
  7. DeniceVB – 210,000
  8. Lynn / Madame DeFarge – 180,000
  9. FLDemFem – 140,000
  10. bettyann – 110,000
  11. Jules – 90,000

In a side note, I regret to report that the sample Golden FLOTUS coffee mugs were not up to my MIL Spec standards. Raj is working on the complex Golden FLOTUS image and we will try again.

Once again, I offer my congratulations to arabella trefoil and all my worthy finalists. Oh, I almost forgot. arabella, Big Guy sends his congratulations too.

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